How to Handle a Child's Meltdown at the Store

Remain calm., Don’t give in., Ignore them., Divert their attention., Take them to a different area., Use positive reinforcement., Don’t worry about what others think., Be aware of their triggers., Spend one-on-one time., Know their limits.

10 Steps 5 min read Medium

Step-by-Step Guide

  1. Step 1: Remain calm.

    When your child begins to have a meltdown, remember to remain calm.

    Do not respond to your child’s tantrum by yelling, screaming, spanking, and becoming angry with them.

    Instead, take a few deep breaths and talk to your child in a calm voice.In a calm, soothing voice tell your child, “Once you calm down, we can talk and figure out what is wrong.” Don’t try to reason with your child while they are having the tantrum.

    You want to teach your child that negotiations and compromises happen when they are calm and in control of their emotions.
  2. Step 2: Don’t give in.

    By giving them what they want while the tantrum is happening, you are giving in.

    By doing this, you risk reinforcing inappropriate behavior.

    You do not want to do this, so stand your ground.By standing your ground, you are demonstrating to your child that their behavior is inappropriate and will not elicit the desired response. , When your child is having a meltdown they want attention.

    So any kind of attention, whether it is positive or negative, can reinforce negative behavior.

    Instead, give them some space to let them get their frustration out while you make your way to a far corner in the store.When your child makes an effort to calm down by themself, this is when you should ask them if everything is ok.

    Certain situations can also cause your child to have a meltdown, for example, going from one place to another or after ending a fun activity.

    These are emotionally charged situations where your child may just need your love and support.

    In these situations, instead of ignoring your child, stop and hold or hug your child until they can calm down., If you sense that a meltdown is about to happen, divert your child’s attention by giving them a toy, a snack, or by showing them something interesting.

    Children have short attention spans, so take advantage of it.Keep toys and snacks in your purse or pocket for moments like these.

    Take them to the seafood section and show them the swimming lobsters, or take them to the fruits and vegetables section and ask them to pick some fruit for you. , If your child will not or cannot calm down, take them to a different location in the store.

    Go to a far corner that is quiet and away from other customers.

    Here you will be able to focus on your child, and it will give them time settle down and recover.Alternatively, you can take them outside of the store until they calm down. , Once your child has calmed own on their own, reward them with praise and hugs.

    Show and tell them that you are happy that they were able to calm down by themself.Hug your child and tell them, “Everything is ok.

    We are almost done.

    When we get home you can have a snack and watch a video.” , Know that there are going to people who judge you when your child is having a meltdown.

    Try not to let these people affect your mood and your ability to calm down your child.

    Do not apologize for your child’s behavior.Instead, use clear and positive statements like, “We are having some difficulties today” or “We are ok.

    I do not think this will go on for too much longer.” , A variety of things can trigger a meltdown.

    However, the most common triggers are hunger, being tired, not getting what they want, or having to stop an activity they like.

    Therefore, try to notice patterns by taking note of when the triggers happen.

    This way you can respond appropriately.

    For example, if your child is hungry, then give them a snack before going to the store or bring one with you.

    If your child has meltdowns as a result of being tired, make sure they take a nap before going to the store with them.

    Additionally, try to avoid areas in the store that you know might trigger a meltdown, for example, the toy or candy section. , If the trigger is something unavoidable, then you will need to create a structure for them that will prepare them for the activity.

    By preparing them for the activity, your child will feel like they have more control over the situation because they know what to expect.Before engaging in the activity, talk to your child.

    Tell them that you are about to go to the store.

    Also, give them an incentive to be good, for example, a trip to the park or the ice cream store if they behave. , If you know that your child is hungry or sleepy, then try to avoid taking them somewhere or prolonging your errand run.

    Take them home and address their needs before finishing your errands.

    Additionally, before taking them to the store, make sure their needs are met.
  3. Step 3: Ignore them.

  4. Step 4: Divert their attention.

  5. Step 5: Take them to a different area.

  6. Step 6: Use positive reinforcement.

  7. Step 7: Don’t worry about what others think.

  8. Step 8: Be aware of their triggers.

  9. Step 9: Spend one-on-one time.

  10. Step 10: Know their limits.

Detailed Guide

When your child begins to have a meltdown, remember to remain calm.

Do not respond to your child’s tantrum by yelling, screaming, spanking, and becoming angry with them.

Instead, take a few deep breaths and talk to your child in a calm voice.In a calm, soothing voice tell your child, “Once you calm down, we can talk and figure out what is wrong.” Don’t try to reason with your child while they are having the tantrum.

You want to teach your child that negotiations and compromises happen when they are calm and in control of their emotions.

By giving them what they want while the tantrum is happening, you are giving in.

By doing this, you risk reinforcing inappropriate behavior.

You do not want to do this, so stand your ground.By standing your ground, you are demonstrating to your child that their behavior is inappropriate and will not elicit the desired response. , When your child is having a meltdown they want attention.

So any kind of attention, whether it is positive or negative, can reinforce negative behavior.

Instead, give them some space to let them get their frustration out while you make your way to a far corner in the store.When your child makes an effort to calm down by themself, this is when you should ask them if everything is ok.

Certain situations can also cause your child to have a meltdown, for example, going from one place to another or after ending a fun activity.

These are emotionally charged situations where your child may just need your love and support.

In these situations, instead of ignoring your child, stop and hold or hug your child until they can calm down., If you sense that a meltdown is about to happen, divert your child’s attention by giving them a toy, a snack, or by showing them something interesting.

Children have short attention spans, so take advantage of it.Keep toys and snacks in your purse or pocket for moments like these.

Take them to the seafood section and show them the swimming lobsters, or take them to the fruits and vegetables section and ask them to pick some fruit for you. , If your child will not or cannot calm down, take them to a different location in the store.

Go to a far corner that is quiet and away from other customers.

Here you will be able to focus on your child, and it will give them time settle down and recover.Alternatively, you can take them outside of the store until they calm down. , Once your child has calmed own on their own, reward them with praise and hugs.

Show and tell them that you are happy that they were able to calm down by themself.Hug your child and tell them, “Everything is ok.

We are almost done.

When we get home you can have a snack and watch a video.” , Know that there are going to people who judge you when your child is having a meltdown.

Try not to let these people affect your mood and your ability to calm down your child.

Do not apologize for your child’s behavior.Instead, use clear and positive statements like, “We are having some difficulties today” or “We are ok.

I do not think this will go on for too much longer.” , A variety of things can trigger a meltdown.

However, the most common triggers are hunger, being tired, not getting what they want, or having to stop an activity they like.

Therefore, try to notice patterns by taking note of when the triggers happen.

This way you can respond appropriately.

For example, if your child is hungry, then give them a snack before going to the store or bring one with you.

If your child has meltdowns as a result of being tired, make sure they take a nap before going to the store with them.

Additionally, try to avoid areas in the store that you know might trigger a meltdown, for example, the toy or candy section. , If the trigger is something unavoidable, then you will need to create a structure for them that will prepare them for the activity.

By preparing them for the activity, your child will feel like they have more control over the situation because they know what to expect.Before engaging in the activity, talk to your child.

Tell them that you are about to go to the store.

Also, give them an incentive to be good, for example, a trip to the park or the ice cream store if they behave. , If you know that your child is hungry or sleepy, then try to avoid taking them somewhere or prolonging your errand run.

Take them home and address their needs before finishing your errands.

Additionally, before taking them to the store, make sure their needs are met.

About the Author

A

Alexander Palmer

A passionate writer with expertise in organization topics. Loves sharing practical knowledge.

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