How to Handle Disappointment
Experience your emotions., Give yourself time to mourn., Be nice to yourself., Talk it out.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Experience your emotions.
In the direct aftermath of disappointment, it's important that you experience your emotions.
When dealing with anything difficult in life, it's vital to acknowledge your emotional reaction even if it's painful or difficult.
Even your emotions are unpleasant in the wake of disappointment, it's important to let yourself feel them.
Your emotional reaction is an important tool when it comes to processing and coping with disappointment.
Emotions offer insight into what the event meant to you.Your emotions may be negative at first.
You may be angry, sad, frustrated, and feel discouraged.
Allow yourself to experience these emotions fully but remind yourself they are temporary.
Try not to analyze your thoughts.
Just let them come on their own and silently acknowledge them in your head.
It can help to name the thoughts as they come.
For example, think to yourself, "Right now, I'm feeling angry.
Right now, I'm feeling scared." -
Step 2: Give yourself time to mourn.
It's unnatural to expect yourself to bounce back from a disappointment instantly.
You need time to take time to mourn what could have been in order to process the disappointment.
It's normal to feel regret following disappointment.
There will be an uncomfortable gap between how you wanted things to turn out and reality.
It's important you acknowledge this gap.Try writing down your feelings in a journal.
Many people going through setbacks, like breakups or job loss, find they recover from negative feelings quicker when they confront them directly in writing.
Take 5 to 10 minutes to just free write your feelings.Your feelings and thoughts may not necessarily be rational when mourning.
You might see things in a very black and white terms.
Keep in mind, when confronting your feelings, that they are not an objective analysis of the situation.
While it's okay to feel what you're feeling, remind yourself that your emotional response does not define you as a person. , Many people have a tendency to be hard on themselves when dealing with disappointment.
It's important to be kind to yourself after rejection.
Try to pull yourself out of the cycle of self-blame and self-loathing.
If a relationship didn't work out, for example, your first instinct may be to blame yourself.
If you're turned down for a job, you may decide it's because of your shortcomings.
In reality, sometimes two people are just not right for each other.
Sometimes, you may simply not meet a company's needs even though you're a qualified, talented worker.It's important, in the aftermath of disappointment, to not engage with self-depreciating thoughts.
Try to be kind to yourself.
You should be able to look at a situation objectively and see how you can change and better yourself.
However, do so through a lens of compassion rather than harsh judgment.
Remind yourself this setback does not define you and you are allowed to make mistakes., Keeping your emotions buried after disappointment is unhealthy.
Find a compassionate friend or family member and talk to them about your feelings.
Choose someone who's a good listener and non-judgmental.
Stress that you're not asking for advice but just attempting to process your feelings. -
Step 3: Be nice to yourself.
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Step 4: Talk it out.
Detailed Guide
In the direct aftermath of disappointment, it's important that you experience your emotions.
When dealing with anything difficult in life, it's vital to acknowledge your emotional reaction even if it's painful or difficult.
Even your emotions are unpleasant in the wake of disappointment, it's important to let yourself feel them.
Your emotional reaction is an important tool when it comes to processing and coping with disappointment.
Emotions offer insight into what the event meant to you.Your emotions may be negative at first.
You may be angry, sad, frustrated, and feel discouraged.
Allow yourself to experience these emotions fully but remind yourself they are temporary.
Try not to analyze your thoughts.
Just let them come on their own and silently acknowledge them in your head.
It can help to name the thoughts as they come.
For example, think to yourself, "Right now, I'm feeling angry.
Right now, I'm feeling scared."
It's unnatural to expect yourself to bounce back from a disappointment instantly.
You need time to take time to mourn what could have been in order to process the disappointment.
It's normal to feel regret following disappointment.
There will be an uncomfortable gap between how you wanted things to turn out and reality.
It's important you acknowledge this gap.Try writing down your feelings in a journal.
Many people going through setbacks, like breakups or job loss, find they recover from negative feelings quicker when they confront them directly in writing.
Take 5 to 10 minutes to just free write your feelings.Your feelings and thoughts may not necessarily be rational when mourning.
You might see things in a very black and white terms.
Keep in mind, when confronting your feelings, that they are not an objective analysis of the situation.
While it's okay to feel what you're feeling, remind yourself that your emotional response does not define you as a person. , Many people have a tendency to be hard on themselves when dealing with disappointment.
It's important to be kind to yourself after rejection.
Try to pull yourself out of the cycle of self-blame and self-loathing.
If a relationship didn't work out, for example, your first instinct may be to blame yourself.
If you're turned down for a job, you may decide it's because of your shortcomings.
In reality, sometimes two people are just not right for each other.
Sometimes, you may simply not meet a company's needs even though you're a qualified, talented worker.It's important, in the aftermath of disappointment, to not engage with self-depreciating thoughts.
Try to be kind to yourself.
You should be able to look at a situation objectively and see how you can change and better yourself.
However, do so through a lens of compassion rather than harsh judgment.
Remind yourself this setback does not define you and you are allowed to make mistakes., Keeping your emotions buried after disappointment is unhealthy.
Find a compassionate friend or family member and talk to them about your feelings.
Choose someone who's a good listener and non-judgmental.
Stress that you're not asking for advice but just attempting to process your feelings.
About the Author
Jacqueline Lane
Specializes in breaking down complex DIY projects topics into simple steps.
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