How to Handle Seeing Your Rapist in Public
Stay calm., Avoid a confrontation., Leave if you need to., Take some deep breaths., Connect with someone you care about., Figure out what to do next., If your rapist follows you, make a scene., Notify security or the police.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Stay calm.
Remember that you are in public and that you are not by yourself.
They can't hurt you.
Look straight ahead and keep walking.
You are strong. -
Step 2: Avoid a confrontation.
Telling them off, while tempting (and certainly deserved), is unlikely to do any good.
At best, you'll make a public scene, and at worst, your rapist will retaliate now or later. , You don't have to stay in the presence of this horrible person.
If you are with other people, excuse yourself and go.
You don't have to explain yourself.
Choose a place that is away but still public (in case your rapist follows). "I'm going to use the bathroom." "I need some air." "Excuse me."
You may feel very shaky and panicky.
This is normal.
Focus on inhaling deeply and feeling your stomach rise and fall in tandem with your breath.
Try practicing relaxation techniques such as...
EMDR eye movements Counting (by ones, twos, sevens, etc.) Imagery Focusing on your senses , If you have a trusted friend or family member with you, explain to them what just happened.
If not, take out your phone and call them.
Hearing the sound of their voice may help you feel less panicked. , Can you leave the scene completely, or do you want to stick it out because you were in the middle of something important? Will there be someone present to support you? How will you leave safely? , Cry loudly and profusely—let out all the tears you've been holding back.
Point to or recoil from your rapist to make it clear who is upsetting you.
Don't censor your reactions.
This will alert other people that your rapist is scaring you, and they will come to your aid.
The rapist will be forced to back off.
Screaming "Stay away from me!" "Leave me alone!" or "Don't hurt me!" can make it very clear to passersby what's going on.
This is very unlikely to happen.
Your rapist's presence was probably a coincidence, and they were most likely going about their business as usual. , They can arrest your rapist, and hopefully put them behind bars.
This can take a load off your mind, and you can walk around without needing to ever see them again. -
Step 3: Leave if you need to.
-
Step 4: Take some deep breaths.
-
Step 5: Connect with someone you care about.
-
Step 6: Figure out what to do next.
-
Step 7: If your rapist follows you
-
Step 8: make a scene.
-
Step 9: Notify security or the police.
Detailed Guide
Remember that you are in public and that you are not by yourself.
They can't hurt you.
Look straight ahead and keep walking.
You are strong.
Telling them off, while tempting (and certainly deserved), is unlikely to do any good.
At best, you'll make a public scene, and at worst, your rapist will retaliate now or later. , You don't have to stay in the presence of this horrible person.
If you are with other people, excuse yourself and go.
You don't have to explain yourself.
Choose a place that is away but still public (in case your rapist follows). "I'm going to use the bathroom." "I need some air." "Excuse me."
You may feel very shaky and panicky.
This is normal.
Focus on inhaling deeply and feeling your stomach rise and fall in tandem with your breath.
Try practicing relaxation techniques such as...
EMDR eye movements Counting (by ones, twos, sevens, etc.) Imagery Focusing on your senses , If you have a trusted friend or family member with you, explain to them what just happened.
If not, take out your phone and call them.
Hearing the sound of their voice may help you feel less panicked. , Can you leave the scene completely, or do you want to stick it out because you were in the middle of something important? Will there be someone present to support you? How will you leave safely? , Cry loudly and profusely—let out all the tears you've been holding back.
Point to or recoil from your rapist to make it clear who is upsetting you.
Don't censor your reactions.
This will alert other people that your rapist is scaring you, and they will come to your aid.
The rapist will be forced to back off.
Screaming "Stay away from me!" "Leave me alone!" or "Don't hurt me!" can make it very clear to passersby what's going on.
This is very unlikely to happen.
Your rapist's presence was probably a coincidence, and they were most likely going about their business as usual. , They can arrest your rapist, and hopefully put them behind bars.
This can take a load off your mind, and you can walk around without needing to ever see them again.
About the Author
Ruth Lee
Ruth Lee is an experienced writer with over 6 years of expertise in lifestyle and practical guides. Passionate about sharing practical knowledge, Ruth creates easy-to-follow guides that help readers achieve their goals.
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