How to Replace Harmful Stims
Consider whether the stim is actually harmful., Start noticing what's going on before you start the stim., Recognize that stimming is a tool., Consider getting outside feedback.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Consider whether the stim is actually harmful.
Just because someone tells you a stim is wrong doesn't mean it's actually wrong.
A harmful stim is one that makes you feel bad—it causes pain or damage to your body, it's unsafe/unsanitary, or you feel it causes you hardship (e.g. ripping so much paper that it's getting expensive to buy this much).
A stim that makes people uncomfortable because it's different is not your fault.
White canes and wheelchairs might make people uncomfortable too, but those disabled people aren't expected to abandon them.
If your stim is not "socially appropriate," that's fine.
Only abandon it if you (and you alone) aren't comfortable with it.
The only time your stim should change for others is if it involves touching them without their consent. -
Step 2: Start noticing what's going on before you start the stim.
Keep a log if it helps, or just remember.
What sort of situations trigger the stim? What needs might you be experiencing? Pay attention, so you can start searching for patterns. , This stim gives you something—an outlet for stress, a sense of relief, or something to keep your hands busy.
If you understand what causes the stim, you will be much more effective at quitting. , The autistic community can provide insights, especially the #AskAnAutistic hashtag, and autistic writers willing to share their alternative stims.
You can also talk through it with a therapist or habit reversal specialist.
Research to see if the stim has turned into a disorder, such as dermatillomania (skin picking) or trichotillomania (hair pulling).
These can be difficult to handle. -
Step 3: Recognize that stimming is a tool.
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Step 4: Consider getting outside feedback.
Detailed Guide
Just because someone tells you a stim is wrong doesn't mean it's actually wrong.
A harmful stim is one that makes you feel bad—it causes pain or damage to your body, it's unsafe/unsanitary, or you feel it causes you hardship (e.g. ripping so much paper that it's getting expensive to buy this much).
A stim that makes people uncomfortable because it's different is not your fault.
White canes and wheelchairs might make people uncomfortable too, but those disabled people aren't expected to abandon them.
If your stim is not "socially appropriate," that's fine.
Only abandon it if you (and you alone) aren't comfortable with it.
The only time your stim should change for others is if it involves touching them without their consent.
Keep a log if it helps, or just remember.
What sort of situations trigger the stim? What needs might you be experiencing? Pay attention, so you can start searching for patterns. , This stim gives you something—an outlet for stress, a sense of relief, or something to keep your hands busy.
If you understand what causes the stim, you will be much more effective at quitting. , The autistic community can provide insights, especially the #AskAnAutistic hashtag, and autistic writers willing to share their alternative stims.
You can also talk through it with a therapist or habit reversal specialist.
Research to see if the stim has turned into a disorder, such as dermatillomania (skin picking) or trichotillomania (hair pulling).
These can be difficult to handle.
About the Author
Andrea Rodriguez
Specializes in breaking down complex creative arts topics into simple steps.
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