How to Bond with the Child of an Affair
Decide whether you plan to stay with your spouse., Determine what your role in the child’s life will be., Set appropriate boundaries.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Decide whether you plan to stay with your spouse.
As you think about the best way to move forward, take the state of your relationship and what you know about your spouse’s infidelity into consideration.
Know that you may have to interact with your spouse’s child if you stay married.
If you get divorced, on the other hand, the child probably won’t be part of your life.There’s no simple way to decide whether or not you should stay married.
Your personal beliefs, your priorities, and any children you already have should factor into your decision. -
Step 2: Determine what your role in the child’s life will be.
Talk with your spouse about what they want for their child.
Decide what you’re willing to live with and what you’re not.For instance, if your spouse wants you to legally adopt their baby and help raise them, think carefully about whether you are willing to take that step.
You might say, "I am flattered that you want me to adopt your child, but I need some time to process all this and think about what that might mean.
Can we pick this discussion back up in a few days?" Since this involves the well-being of the child, a mental health professional should be involved in the decision-making process and the execution of the relationship. , Be up-front with your spouse about your needs and expectations.
If there are any situations you aren’t okay with, let your spouse know what they are.For instance, one of your boundaries might be that your spouse must stop contacting the other man or woman.
Your needs and expectations should center around your comfort, as well as restoring trust in your spouse. -
Step 3: Set appropriate boundaries.
Detailed Guide
As you think about the best way to move forward, take the state of your relationship and what you know about your spouse’s infidelity into consideration.
Know that you may have to interact with your spouse’s child if you stay married.
If you get divorced, on the other hand, the child probably won’t be part of your life.There’s no simple way to decide whether or not you should stay married.
Your personal beliefs, your priorities, and any children you already have should factor into your decision.
Talk with your spouse about what they want for their child.
Decide what you’re willing to live with and what you’re not.For instance, if your spouse wants you to legally adopt their baby and help raise them, think carefully about whether you are willing to take that step.
You might say, "I am flattered that you want me to adopt your child, but I need some time to process all this and think about what that might mean.
Can we pick this discussion back up in a few days?" Since this involves the well-being of the child, a mental health professional should be involved in the decision-making process and the execution of the relationship. , Be up-front with your spouse about your needs and expectations.
If there are any situations you aren’t okay with, let your spouse know what they are.For instance, one of your boundaries might be that your spouse must stop contacting the other man or woman.
Your needs and expectations should center around your comfort, as well as restoring trust in your spouse.
About the Author
Ashley Phillips
A seasoned expert in lifestyle and practical guides, Ashley Phillips combines 4 years of experience with a passion for teaching. Ashley's guides are known for their clarity and practical value.
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