How to Convince Your Parents to Buy You Something
Tell them the productive benefits of what you want., Offer to do something in return., Issue your parents a challenge., Research your product., Make excuses., Write your parents a persuasive letter., Talk to other people., Be willing to compromise...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Tell them the productive benefits of what you want.
Unless you're really lucky (or privileged), there's a good chance that you won't get far by simply asking your parents for something because you want it.
That's the sort of reasoning that toddlers use
- how many times have you heard a five-year-old scream, "but I want it!" during a temper tantrum? Instead, be smart.
Describe the thing you want as something that will help you in some way
- will it help you study? Will it help you do better in sports? Tell your parents how it will help you achieve something beneficial.
Frequently bring this point up in your conversations.
Let's use an example:
Kim is 13 and she wants a tablet computer because she wants to be able to play games, listen to music, and share pictures with her friends.
However, last week, Kim's parents scolded her for goofing off too much and neglecting her homework.
When she goes to her parents to ask for the tablet, she should focus on the wide variety of free educational apps available for her desired model of tablet, not on its recreational potential. -
Step 2: Offer to do something in return.
Your parents may be unwilling to buy you the item you're craving simply because you may use it to do something beneficial.
Sweeten the deal! Offer to do something for your parents if they'll buy you what you want.
Say you'll rake the yard or take out the trash for a month, for instance.
You should have a good idea of the things your parents like
- for starters, most like it when you take on new chores and devote more time to your studies or a wholesome hobby (like sports, band, drama, etc.) When haggling with your folks, start with a low offer.
Instead of saying you'll walk the dog every day for two months, say you'll do it for a week.
They'll probably make you go higher
- this is OK.
If you end up having to walk the dog for a month, you're still better off than if you'd started with your two month offer.
Example:
Kim's parents don't respond well to Kim's attempts to justify a tablet purpose.
Kim's next move is to offer to do all the gardening in the yard.
She says she'll do it for two weeks
- her folks might make her do more, but she's comfortable with anything below a month and a half. , If you're feeling really bold, don't be afraid to give your parents an ultimatum.
Tell them that if they buy you what you want, you'll hit some mark of achievement (for instance, straight A's (no B's) on your next report card.) This is risky
- you're basically betting that you'll be able to deliver on a promise after you get what you want.
This is a good choice for parents who are especially forgetful (or forgiving) and a bad choice for parents who are likely to find a direct challenge to be cocky or disrespectful.
If you can, incorporate the thing you want into your challenge.
If you want a new pair of running shoes, for instance, tell your parents that you'll wear them when you run the half marathon next month.
Example:
Kim has told her parents that she wants a smartphone because it will help her academically.
She backs her claim up by saying that, using the tablet's educational apps to help her study, she'll get an A on her next math test. , Know your desired product ( and any similar alternatives) like the back of your hand.
The more your know about your product, the more serious you'll seem to your parents.
Be prepared to mention specific alternatives to your desired product (especially if they're cheaper.) Shop around online or at local stores to get a sense of the range of prices for your item.
You want to be able to give your parents the lowest possible price for this product, including any rebates, store discounts, etc.
Example:
When Kim approaches her parents about the tablet she wants, she'll give the lowest price she could find on the internet, which takes into account a special offer that requires you to sign up for email ads from the vendor.
She'll also be ready to bring up a cheaper, competing product if her parents refuse. , If you aren't making progress by explaining how the product helps you, you may find success by focusing on why you deserve it.
Have you been especially good? Have you recently had to do something difficult? Tell your parents, for instance, that you've been through "so much" this year and the item is the perfect thing to help you relax.
Example:
Kim just had to spend a weekend at the home of an obnoxious aunt who loves to pinch her cheeks.
When she asks her parents about the tablet she wants, she's ready to describe, in painful detail, how awful it was. , Stubborn parents might be swayed if you show them you're really serious with a well-worded letter.
Use as formal of tone as possible, paying special attention to your spelling and grammar.
Describe to your parents the item's many advantages, how it will help you grow as a person, and why you deserve it. , Your parents have peers and friends, just like you! They're influenced by these peoples' words and opinions like you're influenced by your own friends.
If you get a chance, tell one about this item, describing how useful it will be to you and how much you deserve it.
If you're lucky s/he might tell your parents about it, possibly providing the final "push" to make your folks cave.
Example:
Kim has a doting uncle who thinks she's just the cutest.
At the next family gathering, she'll be sure to mention to him how much she wishes she had a tablet to help with her homework. , You can't always get what you want! If your parents simply won't budge, be ready to accept a lesser offer.
You may need to go halfsies (or more) on the cost with your parents.
You may even have to accept a cheaper or less exciting product.
Take whatever you can get
- it's better than nothing! Example:
Kim's parents finally give in
- they offer to buy her the tablet on the condition that she pay back half of its cost with extra chores.
Kim wisely takes the offer
- refusing now will make it seem like she doesn't really value the tablet's homework-helping potential. , In the presence of one or both of your parents, mention the thing you want very casually without giving any indication that you're desperate for it.
Use only one or two sentences, describing it merely as "cool" or "neat."Subtly judge your parent's reaction. does s/he seem to notice? Did his or her ears perk up? Your parent may have just gotten a good birthday gift idea! Example:
Jason has his eye on a flashy new pair of basketball shoes.
At dinner, while his family's discussing a recent Lakers game, he works a tiny hint into the conversation by saying: "Did you see that slam dunk by Kobe? Must have been those cool Jordans."
If Christmas, Hanukkah, or another gift-giving holiday is right around the corner, don't wear out your good will with your parents by begging for a gift just yet.
Instead, take advantage of the holiday season! Before a gift-giving event, a parent will naturally look and listen for things they can give as a gift
- it's sometimes in the back of their mind for months.
It's usually OK to politely mention a gift idea to your parents (or to give major hints) before the holidays.
Don't ask for too many things
- by focusing on one thing that you really want, you increase the chances you'll get it.
Example:
Christmas is coming up and Jason still wants his new shoes.
The next time he's shooting hoops with his dad, he might say something fairly obvious, like: "Man, I'm having trouble keeping up with you.
It's these worn-out old shoes, I think.
If only I had those new Jordans!"
The more your parents happen to "stumble across" the item that you want, the more they're likely to take your hints! Leave magazines open to advertisements for your product.
If your family shares a computer, leave ads for the item "accidentally" open when you let someone else use it.
If your family has a DVR, cue your parents' favorite shows up to ads for the product.
Do whatever you can to make sure your parents don't go a day without seeing or hearing about the thing your heart's set on! Some parents can be pretty oblivious.
For best results, use lots of repetition.
Example:
Jason's family shares a computer.
Every time Jason's done using the computer, he's sure to leave it open to an online retailer's page for the new shoes he wants. , If your parent is especially oblivious, it can help to make sure they actually see the product in person.
Contrive a reason to go to the store
- for instance, maybe you need to go to the local department store to buy pencils or paper for school.
While you're there, walk by your product in the store.
Pretend to be surprised by it while expressing how cool you think it is.
If you're lucky, your parent might open the possibility for buying it in the future with a short acknowledgement like "Maybe for your birthday." Example:
It's back-to-school season and Jason needs a new backpack.
He knows that the shoe store at the local mall is right next to the backpack store.
As he walks by the front display with his mom, he stops and says "Whoa! Look at those shoes.
Those are really cool! They even have the awesome Velcro strap like the pros use!" His mom replies, "Well, basketball season is in a few months.
We'll pick these up then." Success! , Parents are more likely to buy things for children who do what they're supposed to
- children who study hard, behave politely, and do their chores without complaining.
Give your parents reasons to reward you! Don't talk back to your mom, even when she's totally annoying.
Offer to help your dad cook dinner.
Go outside when you're asked (without complaining.) Do whatever you can to show your parents that you're ready for the responsibility of having this new item you want. , Parents love it when their children behave like adults.
Show them that you're mature with your behavior.
Be polite to everyone you meet, even if they're annoying or stupid.
Always look for ways to help people.
Pursue new hobbies with relish.
Basically, try to be as pleasant and hard-working as possible.
Many adults aren't even this mature
- if you are, you'll seem especially worthy.
One of the biggest mistakes you can make is to throw a tantrum if your parents won't give you what you want (if you do it in public, even worse!) Handling refusals with politeness and dignity is an important part of being an adult.
Don't beg, fuss, or make a scene if you don't get your way. , When adults want something, they usually have to buy it themselves.
If you really, truly want something, a good way to show you're serious about getting it is to start saving money.
Working to earn and save money at a young age is a tremendous sign of maturity.
When they see you're serious, your parents may offer to help you buy the thing you want by covering part of its cost.
If not, keep saving
- if you put away a little money every week, resisting the urge to spend it on small pleasures (like candy and toys), you'll probably be surprised how quickly it builds up! Make sure your parents know you're saving money for this item.
You can tell them directly or give them a visual reminder
- for instance, a jar in the kitchen that you slowly fill with change. -
Step 3: Issue your parents a challenge.
-
Step 4: Research your product.
-
Step 5: Make excuses.
-
Step 6: Write your parents a persuasive letter.
-
Step 7: Talk to other people.
-
Step 8: Be willing to compromise.
-
Step 9: Test the waters.
-
Step 10: Drop serious hints around the holidays.
-
Step 11: Work this item into your parents' lives.
-
Step 12: Plan a visit to the store.
-
Step 13: Be responsible.
-
Step 14: Be mature.
-
Step 15: Save money.
Detailed Guide
Unless you're really lucky (or privileged), there's a good chance that you won't get far by simply asking your parents for something because you want it.
That's the sort of reasoning that toddlers use
- how many times have you heard a five-year-old scream, "but I want it!" during a temper tantrum? Instead, be smart.
Describe the thing you want as something that will help you in some way
- will it help you study? Will it help you do better in sports? Tell your parents how it will help you achieve something beneficial.
Frequently bring this point up in your conversations.
Let's use an example:
Kim is 13 and she wants a tablet computer because she wants to be able to play games, listen to music, and share pictures with her friends.
However, last week, Kim's parents scolded her for goofing off too much and neglecting her homework.
When she goes to her parents to ask for the tablet, she should focus on the wide variety of free educational apps available for her desired model of tablet, not on its recreational potential.
Your parents may be unwilling to buy you the item you're craving simply because you may use it to do something beneficial.
Sweeten the deal! Offer to do something for your parents if they'll buy you what you want.
Say you'll rake the yard or take out the trash for a month, for instance.
You should have a good idea of the things your parents like
- for starters, most like it when you take on new chores and devote more time to your studies or a wholesome hobby (like sports, band, drama, etc.) When haggling with your folks, start with a low offer.
Instead of saying you'll walk the dog every day for two months, say you'll do it for a week.
They'll probably make you go higher
- this is OK.
If you end up having to walk the dog for a month, you're still better off than if you'd started with your two month offer.
Example:
Kim's parents don't respond well to Kim's attempts to justify a tablet purpose.
Kim's next move is to offer to do all the gardening in the yard.
She says she'll do it for two weeks
- her folks might make her do more, but she's comfortable with anything below a month and a half. , If you're feeling really bold, don't be afraid to give your parents an ultimatum.
Tell them that if they buy you what you want, you'll hit some mark of achievement (for instance, straight A's (no B's) on your next report card.) This is risky
- you're basically betting that you'll be able to deliver on a promise after you get what you want.
This is a good choice for parents who are especially forgetful (or forgiving) and a bad choice for parents who are likely to find a direct challenge to be cocky or disrespectful.
If you can, incorporate the thing you want into your challenge.
If you want a new pair of running shoes, for instance, tell your parents that you'll wear them when you run the half marathon next month.
Example:
Kim has told her parents that she wants a smartphone because it will help her academically.
She backs her claim up by saying that, using the tablet's educational apps to help her study, she'll get an A on her next math test. , Know your desired product ( and any similar alternatives) like the back of your hand.
The more your know about your product, the more serious you'll seem to your parents.
Be prepared to mention specific alternatives to your desired product (especially if they're cheaper.) Shop around online or at local stores to get a sense of the range of prices for your item.
You want to be able to give your parents the lowest possible price for this product, including any rebates, store discounts, etc.
Example:
When Kim approaches her parents about the tablet she wants, she'll give the lowest price she could find on the internet, which takes into account a special offer that requires you to sign up for email ads from the vendor.
She'll also be ready to bring up a cheaper, competing product if her parents refuse. , If you aren't making progress by explaining how the product helps you, you may find success by focusing on why you deserve it.
Have you been especially good? Have you recently had to do something difficult? Tell your parents, for instance, that you've been through "so much" this year and the item is the perfect thing to help you relax.
Example:
Kim just had to spend a weekend at the home of an obnoxious aunt who loves to pinch her cheeks.
When she asks her parents about the tablet she wants, she's ready to describe, in painful detail, how awful it was. , Stubborn parents might be swayed if you show them you're really serious with a well-worded letter.
Use as formal of tone as possible, paying special attention to your spelling and grammar.
Describe to your parents the item's many advantages, how it will help you grow as a person, and why you deserve it. , Your parents have peers and friends, just like you! They're influenced by these peoples' words and opinions like you're influenced by your own friends.
If you get a chance, tell one about this item, describing how useful it will be to you and how much you deserve it.
If you're lucky s/he might tell your parents about it, possibly providing the final "push" to make your folks cave.
Example:
Kim has a doting uncle who thinks she's just the cutest.
At the next family gathering, she'll be sure to mention to him how much she wishes she had a tablet to help with her homework. , You can't always get what you want! If your parents simply won't budge, be ready to accept a lesser offer.
You may need to go halfsies (or more) on the cost with your parents.
You may even have to accept a cheaper or less exciting product.
Take whatever you can get
- it's better than nothing! Example:
Kim's parents finally give in
- they offer to buy her the tablet on the condition that she pay back half of its cost with extra chores.
Kim wisely takes the offer
- refusing now will make it seem like she doesn't really value the tablet's homework-helping potential. , In the presence of one or both of your parents, mention the thing you want very casually without giving any indication that you're desperate for it.
Use only one or two sentences, describing it merely as "cool" or "neat."Subtly judge your parent's reaction. does s/he seem to notice? Did his or her ears perk up? Your parent may have just gotten a good birthday gift idea! Example:
Jason has his eye on a flashy new pair of basketball shoes.
At dinner, while his family's discussing a recent Lakers game, he works a tiny hint into the conversation by saying: "Did you see that slam dunk by Kobe? Must have been those cool Jordans."
If Christmas, Hanukkah, or another gift-giving holiday is right around the corner, don't wear out your good will with your parents by begging for a gift just yet.
Instead, take advantage of the holiday season! Before a gift-giving event, a parent will naturally look and listen for things they can give as a gift
- it's sometimes in the back of their mind for months.
It's usually OK to politely mention a gift idea to your parents (or to give major hints) before the holidays.
Don't ask for too many things
- by focusing on one thing that you really want, you increase the chances you'll get it.
Example:
Christmas is coming up and Jason still wants his new shoes.
The next time he's shooting hoops with his dad, he might say something fairly obvious, like: "Man, I'm having trouble keeping up with you.
It's these worn-out old shoes, I think.
If only I had those new Jordans!"
The more your parents happen to "stumble across" the item that you want, the more they're likely to take your hints! Leave magazines open to advertisements for your product.
If your family shares a computer, leave ads for the item "accidentally" open when you let someone else use it.
If your family has a DVR, cue your parents' favorite shows up to ads for the product.
Do whatever you can to make sure your parents don't go a day without seeing or hearing about the thing your heart's set on! Some parents can be pretty oblivious.
For best results, use lots of repetition.
Example:
Jason's family shares a computer.
Every time Jason's done using the computer, he's sure to leave it open to an online retailer's page for the new shoes he wants. , If your parent is especially oblivious, it can help to make sure they actually see the product in person.
Contrive a reason to go to the store
- for instance, maybe you need to go to the local department store to buy pencils or paper for school.
While you're there, walk by your product in the store.
Pretend to be surprised by it while expressing how cool you think it is.
If you're lucky, your parent might open the possibility for buying it in the future with a short acknowledgement like "Maybe for your birthday." Example:
It's back-to-school season and Jason needs a new backpack.
He knows that the shoe store at the local mall is right next to the backpack store.
As he walks by the front display with his mom, he stops and says "Whoa! Look at those shoes.
Those are really cool! They even have the awesome Velcro strap like the pros use!" His mom replies, "Well, basketball season is in a few months.
We'll pick these up then." Success! , Parents are more likely to buy things for children who do what they're supposed to
- children who study hard, behave politely, and do their chores without complaining.
Give your parents reasons to reward you! Don't talk back to your mom, even when she's totally annoying.
Offer to help your dad cook dinner.
Go outside when you're asked (without complaining.) Do whatever you can to show your parents that you're ready for the responsibility of having this new item you want. , Parents love it when their children behave like adults.
Show them that you're mature with your behavior.
Be polite to everyone you meet, even if they're annoying or stupid.
Always look for ways to help people.
Pursue new hobbies with relish.
Basically, try to be as pleasant and hard-working as possible.
Many adults aren't even this mature
- if you are, you'll seem especially worthy.
One of the biggest mistakes you can make is to throw a tantrum if your parents won't give you what you want (if you do it in public, even worse!) Handling refusals with politeness and dignity is an important part of being an adult.
Don't beg, fuss, or make a scene if you don't get your way. , When adults want something, they usually have to buy it themselves.
If you really, truly want something, a good way to show you're serious about getting it is to start saving money.
Working to earn and save money at a young age is a tremendous sign of maturity.
When they see you're serious, your parents may offer to help you buy the thing you want by covering part of its cost.
If not, keep saving
- if you put away a little money every week, resisting the urge to spend it on small pleasures (like candy and toys), you'll probably be surprised how quickly it builds up! Make sure your parents know you're saving money for this item.
You can tell them directly or give them a visual reminder
- for instance, a jar in the kitchen that you slowly fill with change.
About the Author
Kayla Garcia
Brings years of experience writing about home improvement and related subjects.
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