How to Convince Your Parents to Let You Go to Homecoming

Get the timing right., Show gratitude., Explain the details of homecoming., Tell them why you want to go., Give them time to think., Be truthful if you’re going with a date., Give them details about your date., Set up a meeting with your date...

13 Steps 8 min read Advanced

Step-by-Step Guide

  1. Step 1: Get the timing right.

    Whenever you’re asking your parents for something, choosing the right time is key.

    You don’t want to approach them when they’re in a bad mood because they’ll be more likely to say no.

    Instead, try to talk to them when you know that they’re relaxed and happy.Avoid asking your parents when they’re tired or stressed.

    For example, you don’t want to ask your parents about homecoming when they’ve just gotten home from a tough day at work or when they’re running late in the morning and in a hurry to get out the door.

    Try to pay attention to your parents’ moods, so you can choose the right moment.

    For example, if you notice that they’re always in a good mood after eating a tasty meal, plan to ask them after dinner.

    If they seem most relaxed after they go for their evening walk, wait until then to talk to them.
  2. Step 2: Show gratitude.

    Before you bring up the topic of homecoming, make sure that your parents know you’re appreciative of the things they allow you to do.

    If you act like you’re entitled to go to the dance just because you ask, they’re probably not going to let you go.

    Instead, make it clear that you are grateful for the things that they give you or allow you to do.For example, you might say, “I really appreciate that you trusted me enough to go to Carly’s party last month,” or “It means a lot that you let me go into the city with Kyle and his parents last summer.” , Your parents are going to want to know all about homecoming before they make a decision about whether you can go.

    Give them all the information that they’re going to want, such as the date, time, and location of the dance.

    It’s very important to mention what type of supervision that there will be too, so tell them if teachers and/or parents are going to be chaperoning.You also should tell your parents how you plan to get to and from the dance because they’ll probably worry about transportation.

    If there are activities after the dance that you want to attend, such as a party at a friend’s house, be sure to mention that as well.

    Give the name of your friend and their address, and let them know if their parents will be home. , If you want to convince your parents to allow you go to homecoming, you should explain why it’s so important to you.

    You might say that it’s your first year in high school and you really want to have that experience
    -- or you might say that it’s your last year in high school so it’s your last chance to go.

    Be honest about why you want to go to help your parents understand.If you’re not sure what to tell your parents, you might say,“I really want to get dressed up and have fun with my friends,” or “I have some friends on the football team and I really want to celebrate with them.” You might even say, “All of my friends are going, and I really feel like I’ll be missing out if I don’t.” , If you’re excited about homecoming, you’re probably going to want an answer from your parents right away
    -- but it’s important to be patient.

    If you demand an answer right away, it’s much more likely that they’re going to say no.

    Instead, tell them to take some time to think about your request before they make a decision.When you bring up the topic of homecoming, you can make it clear right from the start that you don’t expect an answer right away.

    You might say, “Don’t say yes or no right away please.

    Just listen to what I have to say.” Staying patient can be difficult so you may want to suggest a specific time when you’ll take about homecoming again.

    You might say, “You should think about this.

    Why don’t we talk again tomorrow afternoon?” , If you’re excited about homecoming because a special person asked you to go, it’s important to be honest with your parents about it.

    You may think that will make them less likely to say yes, but you’ll show maturity if you tell them the truth and don’t try to hide it.If you’re not sure how to tell your parents about your date, keep it simple.

    You might say, “Someone really special asked me to go to homecoming, and I’m really excited.” , In most cases, your parents are going to want to know everything they can about your date.

    Provide as much information as you can, such as their name, grade, and what activities they participate.

    You might even explain how you two met and what you like so much about the person.Share whatever details you know about your date’s family.

    Your parents will probably want to know about them too.

    Your parents may also want to know what kinds of grades your date gets too, so don’t be caught off-guard by that.

    If you have a picture of your date, it can sometimes help to share it with your parents. , Even if you give your parents all the information about your date, they may still not be ready to allow you to go to homecoming.

    However, meeting your date in person can often make them feel comfortable.

    Invite your date over to talk with your parents, so everyone can get to know one another.To take some of the pressure off, make the meeting as casual as possible.

    You might invite some friends who your parents already know and like over too, so your date doesn’t feel like they’re being interrogated. , If your parents still aren’t sold on the idea of you going to homecoming with your date, you may need to arrange a meeting for them with your date’s parents.

    That way, they can discuss details such as transportation and post-homecoming activities, and your parents may feel more comfortable if everyone is on the same page.Having your parents meet your date’s parents also allows them to exchange contact information. , If your parents don’t seem comfortable letting you go to homecoming, ask them to explain why.

    They may be concerned about drugs and alcohol, or they may be worried about who’s driving you.

    Listen to them calmly and patiently, so they have a chance to express themselves.If you're not sure how to start the conversation, you might say, "I know that you're unsure about homecoming.

    What are you concerned about?" It may be difficult, but don’t interrupt your parents when they’re talking.

    Be respectful and show that you take their concerns seriously. , Once you know what your parents’ concerns or objections are, you can try to find ways to address them.

    In most cases, that means being willing to compromise.

    For example, they might not want you to go to the post-homecoming activities, so agree that you’ll just go to the dance and come straight home.

    They may be concerned about your transportation for the evening, so you might suggest that they drive you to and from the dance.

    Find a way to make you and your parents both at least a little bit happy.Another way to compromise with your parents about homecoming is to suggest periodic check-ins over the course of the night.

    For example, you might agree to text or call when you arrive at the dance, at some point in the middle, and right before you leave.

    If you’re headed to post-homecoming activities, you can check in again when you arrive at the locale and when you’re on your way home. , If you behave in a mature, responsible way, your parents are more likely to trust you and allow you to go to homecoming.

    Make a habit of always obeying your curfew, so they know that you'll be home when you say that you will.

    If they give you chores around the house, do them without your parents having to remind you.

    You should also be kind to your siblings, and try to resolve conflicts with them without having your parents intervene.Your performance in school can also help convince your parents to let you go.

    Work to get good grades so they know that you take your responsibilities seriously. , If your parents ultimately decide not to allow you to go to homecoming, accept the decision calmly and maturely.

    Avoid whining or yelling because you didn’t get what you wanted.

    That will only make your parents angry, so they’re less likely to allow you to attend other events in the future.

    It can also help convince them that they made the right decision.If you feel yourself getting upset about your parents’ decision, take a moment to count to 10 in your head.

    That can often help you calm down.
  3. Step 3: Explain the details of homecoming.

  4. Step 4: Tell them why you want to go.

  5. Step 5: Give them time to think.

  6. Step 6: Be truthful if you’re going with a date.

  7. Step 7: Give them details about your date.

  8. Step 8: Set up a meeting with your date.

  9. Step 9: Arrange for the parents talk.

  10. Step 10: Listen to their concerns and objections.

  11. Step 11: Be willing to compromise.

  12. Step 12: Earn their trust.

  13. Step 13: Accept their decision.

Detailed Guide

Whenever you’re asking your parents for something, choosing the right time is key.

You don’t want to approach them when they’re in a bad mood because they’ll be more likely to say no.

Instead, try to talk to them when you know that they’re relaxed and happy.Avoid asking your parents when they’re tired or stressed.

For example, you don’t want to ask your parents about homecoming when they’ve just gotten home from a tough day at work or when they’re running late in the morning and in a hurry to get out the door.

Try to pay attention to your parents’ moods, so you can choose the right moment.

For example, if you notice that they’re always in a good mood after eating a tasty meal, plan to ask them after dinner.

If they seem most relaxed after they go for their evening walk, wait until then to talk to them.

Before you bring up the topic of homecoming, make sure that your parents know you’re appreciative of the things they allow you to do.

If you act like you’re entitled to go to the dance just because you ask, they’re probably not going to let you go.

Instead, make it clear that you are grateful for the things that they give you or allow you to do.For example, you might say, “I really appreciate that you trusted me enough to go to Carly’s party last month,” or “It means a lot that you let me go into the city with Kyle and his parents last summer.” , Your parents are going to want to know all about homecoming before they make a decision about whether you can go.

Give them all the information that they’re going to want, such as the date, time, and location of the dance.

It’s very important to mention what type of supervision that there will be too, so tell them if teachers and/or parents are going to be chaperoning.You also should tell your parents how you plan to get to and from the dance because they’ll probably worry about transportation.

If there are activities after the dance that you want to attend, such as a party at a friend’s house, be sure to mention that as well.

Give the name of your friend and their address, and let them know if their parents will be home. , If you want to convince your parents to allow you go to homecoming, you should explain why it’s so important to you.

You might say that it’s your first year in high school and you really want to have that experience
-- or you might say that it’s your last year in high school so it’s your last chance to go.

Be honest about why you want to go to help your parents understand.If you’re not sure what to tell your parents, you might say,“I really want to get dressed up and have fun with my friends,” or “I have some friends on the football team and I really want to celebrate with them.” You might even say, “All of my friends are going, and I really feel like I’ll be missing out if I don’t.” , If you’re excited about homecoming, you’re probably going to want an answer from your parents right away
-- but it’s important to be patient.

If you demand an answer right away, it’s much more likely that they’re going to say no.

Instead, tell them to take some time to think about your request before they make a decision.When you bring up the topic of homecoming, you can make it clear right from the start that you don’t expect an answer right away.

You might say, “Don’t say yes or no right away please.

Just listen to what I have to say.” Staying patient can be difficult so you may want to suggest a specific time when you’ll take about homecoming again.

You might say, “You should think about this.

Why don’t we talk again tomorrow afternoon?” , If you’re excited about homecoming because a special person asked you to go, it’s important to be honest with your parents about it.

You may think that will make them less likely to say yes, but you’ll show maturity if you tell them the truth and don’t try to hide it.If you’re not sure how to tell your parents about your date, keep it simple.

You might say, “Someone really special asked me to go to homecoming, and I’m really excited.” , In most cases, your parents are going to want to know everything they can about your date.

Provide as much information as you can, such as their name, grade, and what activities they participate.

You might even explain how you two met and what you like so much about the person.Share whatever details you know about your date’s family.

Your parents will probably want to know about them too.

Your parents may also want to know what kinds of grades your date gets too, so don’t be caught off-guard by that.

If you have a picture of your date, it can sometimes help to share it with your parents. , Even if you give your parents all the information about your date, they may still not be ready to allow you to go to homecoming.

However, meeting your date in person can often make them feel comfortable.

Invite your date over to talk with your parents, so everyone can get to know one another.To take some of the pressure off, make the meeting as casual as possible.

You might invite some friends who your parents already know and like over too, so your date doesn’t feel like they’re being interrogated. , If your parents still aren’t sold on the idea of you going to homecoming with your date, you may need to arrange a meeting for them with your date’s parents.

That way, they can discuss details such as transportation and post-homecoming activities, and your parents may feel more comfortable if everyone is on the same page.Having your parents meet your date’s parents also allows them to exchange contact information. , If your parents don’t seem comfortable letting you go to homecoming, ask them to explain why.

They may be concerned about drugs and alcohol, or they may be worried about who’s driving you.

Listen to them calmly and patiently, so they have a chance to express themselves.If you're not sure how to start the conversation, you might say, "I know that you're unsure about homecoming.

What are you concerned about?" It may be difficult, but don’t interrupt your parents when they’re talking.

Be respectful and show that you take their concerns seriously. , Once you know what your parents’ concerns or objections are, you can try to find ways to address them.

In most cases, that means being willing to compromise.

For example, they might not want you to go to the post-homecoming activities, so agree that you’ll just go to the dance and come straight home.

They may be concerned about your transportation for the evening, so you might suggest that they drive you to and from the dance.

Find a way to make you and your parents both at least a little bit happy.Another way to compromise with your parents about homecoming is to suggest periodic check-ins over the course of the night.

For example, you might agree to text or call when you arrive at the dance, at some point in the middle, and right before you leave.

If you’re headed to post-homecoming activities, you can check in again when you arrive at the locale and when you’re on your way home. , If you behave in a mature, responsible way, your parents are more likely to trust you and allow you to go to homecoming.

Make a habit of always obeying your curfew, so they know that you'll be home when you say that you will.

If they give you chores around the house, do them without your parents having to remind you.

You should also be kind to your siblings, and try to resolve conflicts with them without having your parents intervene.Your performance in school can also help convince your parents to let you go.

Work to get good grades so they know that you take your responsibilities seriously. , If your parents ultimately decide not to allow you to go to homecoming, accept the decision calmly and maturely.

Avoid whining or yelling because you didn’t get what you wanted.

That will only make your parents angry, so they’re less likely to allow you to attend other events in the future.

It can also help convince them that they made the right decision.If you feel yourself getting upset about your parents’ decision, take a moment to count to 10 in your head.

That can often help you calm down.

About the Author

J

James Jenkins

Brings years of experience writing about crafts and related subjects.

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