How to Deal with Favoritism in Your Family
Don't take it personally., Talk to your family members about how you feel., Avoid blaming the favored sibling., Spend some individual time with your family.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Don't take it personally.
You are special with your own quirks and traits.
Don't allow your parents' favoritism to get to your self-esteem.
It's just that the favored sibling's abilities are noticed more than yours.
It doesn't mean you don't have any good qualities. -
Step 2: Talk to your family members about how you feel.
You can't force them to change, but by knowing how you feel when they favor someone else, they will most likely change because they love you.
Sit your parents down and tell them your emotions.
For example, you could say "Mom and Dad, I feel hurt and unimportant when you favor (sibling's name) over me.
Could you please not do that?" Be honest with your feelings and don't sugarcoat the situation.
Favoritism is wrong, even if your parents aren't aware of it.
Be calm and don't yell but be firm.
If they don't care about how you feel, thank them for hearing you and don't avoid bringing up the subject again but with maturity and show your family that you aren't going to be put down by their favoritism.
If they still don't understand, make sure this doesn't break your sibling bond. , Although it may seem tempting to blame your sibling for what's happening, don't.
It isn't your sibling's fault they are being favored as they didn't ask for it.
Still be nice to them and respect them.
Blaming doesn't do anything effective, and in the end both of you will be hurt. , Usually, the reason why favoritism happens, is because the parent/guardian/relative views the unfavored child as "just another family member" rather then an individual.
You need to let them know that you are individually different, with your own talents and qualities.
For example, if your Dad likes baseball, just you and him could attend a baseball game.
Or if you're a girl and enjoy shopping, you and your Mom could just go to the mall and shop. -
Step 3: Avoid blaming the favored sibling.
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Step 4: Spend some individual time with your family.
Detailed Guide
You are special with your own quirks and traits.
Don't allow your parents' favoritism to get to your self-esteem.
It's just that the favored sibling's abilities are noticed more than yours.
It doesn't mean you don't have any good qualities.
You can't force them to change, but by knowing how you feel when they favor someone else, they will most likely change because they love you.
Sit your parents down and tell them your emotions.
For example, you could say "Mom and Dad, I feel hurt and unimportant when you favor (sibling's name) over me.
Could you please not do that?" Be honest with your feelings and don't sugarcoat the situation.
Favoritism is wrong, even if your parents aren't aware of it.
Be calm and don't yell but be firm.
If they don't care about how you feel, thank them for hearing you and don't avoid bringing up the subject again but with maturity and show your family that you aren't going to be put down by their favoritism.
If they still don't understand, make sure this doesn't break your sibling bond. , Although it may seem tempting to blame your sibling for what's happening, don't.
It isn't your sibling's fault they are being favored as they didn't ask for it.
Still be nice to them and respect them.
Blaming doesn't do anything effective, and in the end both of you will be hurt. , Usually, the reason why favoritism happens, is because the parent/guardian/relative views the unfavored child as "just another family member" rather then an individual.
You need to let them know that you are individually different, with your own talents and qualities.
For example, if your Dad likes baseball, just you and him could attend a baseball game.
Or if you're a girl and enjoy shopping, you and your Mom could just go to the mall and shop.
About the Author
Frank Stewart
Professional writer focused on creating easy-to-follow practical skills tutorials.
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