How to Decide if You Should Have Kids when You Have Depression
Consider your personal and family history of mental illness., Talk to your doctor or a counselor., Be aware of the effects of antidepressants on babies in the womb., Learn about the risk of postpartum depression., Understand the emotional demands of...
Step-by-Step Guide
-
Step 1: Consider your personal and family history of mental illness.
Depression has a strong genetic component.
Someone whose parents or siblings have had depression has two to three times the average risk of developing the condition themselves.
The risk increases even more sharply for people whose close relatives have had multiple depressive periods.
While depression isn’t always handed down from parents to children, be aware that it does happen frequently.This risk only applies to biological children.
Adopted children are not at risk for “catching” depression from a parent. -
Step 2: Talk to your doctor or a counselor.
No two cases of depression are quite alike.
Your doctor or a mental health professional can help you evaluate whether having children is a good idea for you.A doctor can tell you about your risk of passing on depression to a child, advise you about whether you can safely take medications while pregnant, and refer you to a counselor for emotional support. , Any medications you take during pregnancy affect the unborn baby as well.
Many antidepressants are known to harm developing babies by causing birth defects, low birth weight, damage to the lungs, and even miscarriages.Some women opt to stop taking their antidepressants when they decide to have a child.
Think about whether you would be able to go for nine months without the medications you are accustomed to taking. , Postpartum depression is a serious and common form of depression that more than 10% of new moms experience after giving birth.
Women who have a history of depression are especially likely to develop postpartum depression.Postpartum depression may cause feelings of despair, anger, or emptiness in the weeks or months after giving birth.
Many mothers with postpartum depression feel unable to bond with their baby or struggle with intrusive thoughts about hurting themselves or the baby.
Without treatment, postpartum depression can persist for years after giving birth., Babies and toddlers need a lot of attention and love to develop socially and emotionally.
Depressed parents sometimes have a hard time giving their children the affection and discipline they need.
Ask yourself whether you feel prepared to provide for a child emotionally, not just physically.Children whose parents are emotionally absent may have developmental delays or behavioral problems. , Studies have found that there is no significant difference in happiness between older adults with children and those who are child-free.
Deciding to stay child free for medical or personal reasons won’t doom you to a meaningless or lonely life.Some cultures and families place a lot of importance on having kids.
If you’re feeling pressured, remember that what works for one person won’t work for another.
There are many good reasons to have children, but doing it simply to make somebody else happy isn’t one of them.
Being child-free doesn’t mean you’re selfish.
Sometimes not having children is the responsible choice.
Friendships, careers, volunteer work, and creative work are all meaningful ways child-free people can contribute to the world. -
Step 3: Be aware of the effects of antidepressants on babies in the womb.
-
Step 4: Learn about the risk of postpartum depression.
-
Step 5: Understand the emotional demands of raising a child.
-
Step 6: Know that you can live a fulfilled life without having children.
Detailed Guide
Depression has a strong genetic component.
Someone whose parents or siblings have had depression has two to three times the average risk of developing the condition themselves.
The risk increases even more sharply for people whose close relatives have had multiple depressive periods.
While depression isn’t always handed down from parents to children, be aware that it does happen frequently.This risk only applies to biological children.
Adopted children are not at risk for “catching” depression from a parent.
No two cases of depression are quite alike.
Your doctor or a mental health professional can help you evaluate whether having children is a good idea for you.A doctor can tell you about your risk of passing on depression to a child, advise you about whether you can safely take medications while pregnant, and refer you to a counselor for emotional support. , Any medications you take during pregnancy affect the unborn baby as well.
Many antidepressants are known to harm developing babies by causing birth defects, low birth weight, damage to the lungs, and even miscarriages.Some women opt to stop taking their antidepressants when they decide to have a child.
Think about whether you would be able to go for nine months without the medications you are accustomed to taking. , Postpartum depression is a serious and common form of depression that more than 10% of new moms experience after giving birth.
Women who have a history of depression are especially likely to develop postpartum depression.Postpartum depression may cause feelings of despair, anger, or emptiness in the weeks or months after giving birth.
Many mothers with postpartum depression feel unable to bond with their baby or struggle with intrusive thoughts about hurting themselves or the baby.
Without treatment, postpartum depression can persist for years after giving birth., Babies and toddlers need a lot of attention and love to develop socially and emotionally.
Depressed parents sometimes have a hard time giving their children the affection and discipline they need.
Ask yourself whether you feel prepared to provide for a child emotionally, not just physically.Children whose parents are emotionally absent may have developmental delays or behavioral problems. , Studies have found that there is no significant difference in happiness between older adults with children and those who are child-free.
Deciding to stay child free for medical or personal reasons won’t doom you to a meaningless or lonely life.Some cultures and families place a lot of importance on having kids.
If you’re feeling pressured, remember that what works for one person won’t work for another.
There are many good reasons to have children, but doing it simply to make somebody else happy isn’t one of them.
Being child-free doesn’t mean you’re selfish.
Sometimes not having children is the responsible choice.
Friendships, careers, volunteer work, and creative work are all meaningful ways child-free people can contribute to the world.
About the Author
Charles Hughes
Specializes in breaking down complex practical skills topics into simple steps.
Rate This Guide
How helpful was this guide? Click to rate: