How to Get Your Child to Leave the Playground
Let your child know that it's almost time to go., Be direct and firm., Follow through., Reflect his behavior., Praise the child for leaving peacefully.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Let your child know that it's almost time to go.
His reaction will probably be very different if you start preparing him for the moment when you have to go than if you abruptly tell him you need to go immediately.
Start preparing him to leave the playground and give him a five minute warning. -
Step 2: Be direct and firm.
When it's time to leave the playground, after having given a five minute warning, and maybe even a one more minute warning, approach your child and tell him "it's time to go." Generally this can cause your child to state that he or she doesn't want to leave yet (whether or not they can put this into words doesn't matter
-- you understand somehow that they don't want to leave). , It is important to do what you say you are going to do, or else you become unreliable, and your child will learn that you do not mean what you say, and your child will push you (usually by whining or screaming or some other "torture" method), and if you give in to the child's demands, you are teaching the child to act in this whining/screaming/awful way, because you are rewarding him or her. , To reflect is to make yourself a mirror for the child of the child. So you say to your child, in a soothing voice, "you wish we could stay in the playground. You feel very sad to leave the playground." Or "you look so angry because we are leaving. You wish we could stay and play longer." This lets the child know that you understand. There is no need for the child to scream or escalate into a tantrum once the child has been heard. There is no need for you to bribe the child with a treat if he or she will leave in peace. You might even surprise the child further by offering your own feelings about how hard it is to leave the playground, especially if they match the child's feelings; this will foster greater attachment. , Let the child know that you appreciate his or her cooperation and that life is so much nicer when the two of you can cooperate with each other. -
Step 3: Follow through.
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Step 4: Reflect his behavior.
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Step 5: Praise the child for leaving peacefully.
Detailed Guide
His reaction will probably be very different if you start preparing him for the moment when you have to go than if you abruptly tell him you need to go immediately.
Start preparing him to leave the playground and give him a five minute warning.
When it's time to leave the playground, after having given a five minute warning, and maybe even a one more minute warning, approach your child and tell him "it's time to go." Generally this can cause your child to state that he or she doesn't want to leave yet (whether or not they can put this into words doesn't matter
-- you understand somehow that they don't want to leave). , It is important to do what you say you are going to do, or else you become unreliable, and your child will learn that you do not mean what you say, and your child will push you (usually by whining or screaming or some other "torture" method), and if you give in to the child's demands, you are teaching the child to act in this whining/screaming/awful way, because you are rewarding him or her. , To reflect is to make yourself a mirror for the child of the child. So you say to your child, in a soothing voice, "you wish we could stay in the playground. You feel very sad to leave the playground." Or "you look so angry because we are leaving. You wish we could stay and play longer." This lets the child know that you understand. There is no need for the child to scream or escalate into a tantrum once the child has been heard. There is no need for you to bribe the child with a treat if he or she will leave in peace. You might even surprise the child further by offering your own feelings about how hard it is to leave the playground, especially if they match the child's feelings; this will foster greater attachment. , Let the child know that you appreciate his or her cooperation and that life is so much nicer when the two of you can cooperate with each other.
About the Author
Linda Jimenez
Dedicated to helping readers learn new skills in lifestyle and beyond.
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