How to Give Your Toddler Rewards Instead of Bribes
Create a game that reinforces good habits., Let your child take the lead., Give surprise rewards.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Create a game that reinforces good habits.
Think of a fun game your toddler can enjoy while performing the task instead of offering a bribe.
Creating a game takes the focus off of the result and teaches them the behaviors they need to learn to get to that result.
A game also creates the incentive of a challenge, which most kids enjoy.
For example, play a game of who can use the potty the most during the day, you or your toddler.
Or, who can pick up the most toys off of the floor in a certain amount of time.
Games make the task fun and teach them how to engage in the behaviors.Make sure you are not simply letting your child win, though, as this is no better than a bribe.
Foster gracious losing, and encourage them to do better by challenging them to beat their own records. -
Step 2: Let your child take the lead.
Encourage your child to make the right decision instead of bribing them to do so.
Creating an environment that allows them to ultimately come up with the appropriate choice makes it easier on you and helps them with problem-solving skills.
For instance, if your child refuses to change out of their Halloween costume before going to bed, allow them to try to sleep in it.
Eventually, they will likely realize that the costume is uncomfortable and will ask to change into their pajamas.
They learn to make the right decisions on their own and you don’t have to bribe them to do it.Follow up with your child after they've made a decision.
Talk to them about how they worked out their choices to help them learn. , The difference between bribing and rewarding is bribes are talked about beforehand, whereas rewards are mentioned after the fact.
Giving your child a reward for good behavior or performing a good deed is essentially a surprise, as it’s not usually known until afterwards.
Surprise rewards teach children that if they behave, good things are coming down the pipe for them at some point, though maybe not on demand or all the time.
Avoid giving your child rewards each time they do something, as it may make them expect it.
Instead, offer rewards occasionally, especially if they complete a task or perform a behavior that is special.
This can change the thinking that bad behavior earns what they want, like bribes can do. -
Step 3: Give surprise rewards.
Detailed Guide
Think of a fun game your toddler can enjoy while performing the task instead of offering a bribe.
Creating a game takes the focus off of the result and teaches them the behaviors they need to learn to get to that result.
A game also creates the incentive of a challenge, which most kids enjoy.
For example, play a game of who can use the potty the most during the day, you or your toddler.
Or, who can pick up the most toys off of the floor in a certain amount of time.
Games make the task fun and teach them how to engage in the behaviors.Make sure you are not simply letting your child win, though, as this is no better than a bribe.
Foster gracious losing, and encourage them to do better by challenging them to beat their own records.
Encourage your child to make the right decision instead of bribing them to do so.
Creating an environment that allows them to ultimately come up with the appropriate choice makes it easier on you and helps them with problem-solving skills.
For instance, if your child refuses to change out of their Halloween costume before going to bed, allow them to try to sleep in it.
Eventually, they will likely realize that the costume is uncomfortable and will ask to change into their pajamas.
They learn to make the right decisions on their own and you don’t have to bribe them to do it.Follow up with your child after they've made a decision.
Talk to them about how they worked out their choices to help them learn. , The difference between bribing and rewarding is bribes are talked about beforehand, whereas rewards are mentioned after the fact.
Giving your child a reward for good behavior or performing a good deed is essentially a surprise, as it’s not usually known until afterwards.
Surprise rewards teach children that if they behave, good things are coming down the pipe for them at some point, though maybe not on demand or all the time.
Avoid giving your child rewards each time they do something, as it may make them expect it.
Instead, offer rewards occasionally, especially if they complete a task or perform a behavior that is special.
This can change the thinking that bad behavior earns what they want, like bribes can do.
About the Author
Lori James
A passionate writer with expertise in lifestyle topics. Loves sharing practical knowledge.
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