How to Have Children Behave at a Formal Event

Step-by-Step Guide

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   Step 1: Make sure it is acceptable and appropriate for children to attend.

   Confirm with the host if the event is open to families or if it is adult only.
   
   Never assume!
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   Step 2: Find out the duration and actual start time of the event.

   If it is too late or during nap time you could be fighting an uphill battle with the most behaved child.
   
   The time on the invitation may be just the start time.
   
   Talk to the host and determine if there will be a other festivities such as a cocktail hour (such as at a wedding) or multiple services at a funeral.
   
   Find out if other children are attending.
   
   Reach out to those parents if you know them.
   
   Working as a team can give everyone a chance to appreciate the service. , Start this conversation well in advance of the event.
   
   Make your expectations clear, and keep up the dialogue. , Remember to practice appropriate table manners if food will be served.
   
   This includes sitting in the chair and not crawling around on the floor or under the table.
   
   This also includes not throwing food.
   
   Suggest they will be given a special treat if they continue the good behavior throughout the event. ,,,, This is still good to know should your child have a bad day or starts getting sick while you're away. , Bring coloring books or other items to occupy your child or to make sure they will not disturb other guests.
   
   Pick up a few inexpensive new toys to keep your child's interest. , You'll have time to get settled with your child before the event begins. ,,, Your child is used to this attention and will miss it if not provided.
   
   A few minutes of play or conversation with your child will be well rewarded. ,, When the child acts up (this includes crying or whining) you should leave the event (especially during religious services or when others are trying to hear). ,
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   Step 3: Discuss with the child the event and the expected behavior.

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   Step 4: Practice key behaviors at home and reward good behavior with praise.

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   Step 5: Determine if your child can act and behave appropriately (by everyone else's standards and not just yours).

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   Step 6: Make the decision to take your child or find other arrangements.

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   Step 7: Create a plan with your spouse or other close family attending to assist you with the childcare and managing your child at the event.

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   Step 8: Ask about available childcare during the event or nearby if you'll be traveling from out of town.

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   Step 9: Take steps to make sure the event is as comfortable for your child as possible.

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    Step 10: Leave for the event a little early.

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    Step 11: Bring their stroller or someplace comfortable for them to sit and maybe nap.

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    Step 12: Ask your child about taking a potty break before the event begins.

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    Step 13: Give your child your full attention at regular intervals during the event.

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    Step 14: Know when to excuse yourselves to regain control and know when it is time to leave.

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    Step 15: Don't force your child to endure an event just so you can stick around.

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    Step 16: Anticipate that your child will likely melt down and fuss at bedtime and plan your exit to not disturb the other guests.

Detailed Guide

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