How to Help Kids Cope with Being Socially Excluded
Keep an eye on your child’s social life., Be available if your child wants to talk., Empathize with your child., Avoid trying to fix the situation immediately.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Keep an eye on your child’s social life.
Know who your child’s friends are, and ask about them occasionally.
Notice whether your child expresses frustration or annoyance with someone in their social circle – it could be a sign that that person has hurt their feelings.
Be aware of your child’s social habits, and observe whether anything changes.For instance, if your teenage daughter usually texts a friend multiple times a day, a sudden silence could mean something is amiss. -
Step 2: Be available if your child wants to talk.
Let your child know that you’re always willing to listen to them.
If your child comes to you with a social problem, give them your full attention.
Don’t brush them off or dismiss their feelings.Wait for your child to initiate the conversation.
If you try to make them talk to you before they’re ready, they will just clam up.
You can also ask open ended questions to encourage your child to open up, such as “How was your day at school?” , Comfort your child by letting them know you understand how they’re feeling.
Use active listening techniques and mirror what they are saying.For instance, if your son tells you his friends are leaving him out of games at recess, you could say, “It must make you feel really sad that your friends won’t let you play.” , Hold off on offering any advice, and don’t say anything bad about your child’s friends.
Give your child a chance to resolve the issue themselves.
The problem may go away by itself in a few days. -
Step 3: Empathize with your child.
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Step 4: Avoid trying to fix the situation immediately.
Detailed Guide
Know who your child’s friends are, and ask about them occasionally.
Notice whether your child expresses frustration or annoyance with someone in their social circle – it could be a sign that that person has hurt their feelings.
Be aware of your child’s social habits, and observe whether anything changes.For instance, if your teenage daughter usually texts a friend multiple times a day, a sudden silence could mean something is amiss.
Let your child know that you’re always willing to listen to them.
If your child comes to you with a social problem, give them your full attention.
Don’t brush them off or dismiss their feelings.Wait for your child to initiate the conversation.
If you try to make them talk to you before they’re ready, they will just clam up.
You can also ask open ended questions to encourage your child to open up, such as “How was your day at school?” , Comfort your child by letting them know you understand how they’re feeling.
Use active listening techniques and mirror what they are saying.For instance, if your son tells you his friends are leaving him out of games at recess, you could say, “It must make you feel really sad that your friends won’t let you play.” , Hold off on offering any advice, and don’t say anything bad about your child’s friends.
Give your child a chance to resolve the issue themselves.
The problem may go away by itself in a few days.
About the Author
Donna Ross
Brings years of experience writing about hobbies and related subjects.
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