How to Help Your Children Get Along

Step-by-Step Guide

1. 1

   Step 1: Task your children with working together instead of competing.

   This will help your children cooperate with each other in regards to working toward a particular goal.
   
   For example, state that both children will earn a treat if they help each other clean their rooms, instead of rewarding a particular child with a treat if they are the first one to finish cleaning their room.
2. 2

   Step 2: Perform or initiate activities that your children can enjoy with each other.

   Creating enjoyable moments for your children to experience with one another will help them forge a friendly bond and may cause them to initiate fights less frequently.
   
   Play board games with your children or sports that allow them to be on the same team, allow them to watch films they all enjoy, or allow them to help you cook their favorite meals. , For example, if one child enjoys martial arts, sign them up for karate classes; whereas if your other child wants to play a musical instrument, allow them to attend band class at school or allow them to take private lessons. , This will encourage your children to appreciate one another despite their differences.
   
   Encourage your children to attend concerts, sporting events, or other activities in which their siblings participate in. , This will allow your children to perform activities they like to do alone without having to share friends, toys, or personal space with their siblings.
   
   Allow your children to play with their friends without being required to bring along their sibling, or allow your children to play in their rooms by themselves. , This will help your children understand that you are not playing favorites when one child seems to receive preferential treatment.
   
   For example, if you have multiple children interested in dating, set a rule that allows each child to date when they become 15 years of age.
   
   This will help prevent your 14-year old child from feeling distressed or upset when you allow your 16-year old to date.
   
   Allow your children to develop a list of consequences that will occur when the ground rules are broken.
   
   This will help teach them that every sibling in the household is responsible for their own behavior. , Making comparisons can generate sibling rivalry and fights because your children will try to compete for your attention and approval. , This will encourage your children to continue to get along more often and allows them to witness your appreciation.
   
   Thank your children for behaving nicely toward one another, or reward them with small treats or gifts when you see them getting along. , When your children can understand why and how their actions affected the other sibling, it may help them realize why a particular action was inappropriate.
   
   Talk with your children moments after a fight has erupted and allow them to discuss their feelings with each other.
   
   For example, if your children fought because one began cussing or making mean comments toward the other, have your child explain to the other sibling that the cussing and mean comments hurt their feelings.
3. 3

   Step 3: Allow your children to participate in activities they each specifically enjoy.

4. 4

   Step 4: Show your children how to support each other's interests.

5. 5

   Step 5: Give each of your children time to themselves.

6. 6

   Step 6: Set ground rules that apply to every child in the household.

7. 7

   Step 7: Refrain from comparing your children to one another.

8. 8

   Step 8: Reward your children when they exhibit positive behavior toward one another.

9. 9

   Step 9: Teach your children how to listen to each other.

Detailed Guide

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