How to Make Parents Feel Comfortable During a Parent or Teacher Conference
Schedule meetings with parents with a fairly wide window., Be on time for any parent appointments you have., Do not bring anything to the meeting that would distract you from the communication at hand., Do bring to the meeting anything relevant to...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Schedule meetings with parents with a fairly wide window.
Meetings never run as efficiently and quickly as you would think.
What you expect should take twenty minutes will invariably turn into forty.
Don't schedule a parent meeting to occur fifteen minutes before the students come back from lunch. -
Step 2: Be on time for any parent appointments you have.
If other teachers are coming as well, make sure that they remember the time and location through email reminder or note.
Have a plan to quickly locate and retrieve those staff members if they have forgotten. , That includes papers to grade, your water bill, cell phone, or laptop (no surfing the net at this time). , This includes work samples, behavior log, current report card or class average, and details of missing assignments if you plan to allow the child to make up missing work. , Many times there is something discussed that requires one of the people at the meeting to do some follow-up activity.
Don't assume you'll remember what you discussed or promised to do later.
Write it down.
You may want to provide a small pad of paper and pen for parents too, as many of them don't bring anything to write with. , Try to seat yourself next to them rather than across from them.
If there are multiple staff members attending, make sure that you don't physically seat yourselves together apart from the parent.
Try for more of a circular seating pattern than a panel style arrangement.
Parents are already nervous, and many feel intimidated when they are alone in a chair facing a line of teachers. , Hopefully you haven't gotten this far into the year without that knowledge, but be sure of it before you start.
You'll also want to make sure you know the relationship of the visiting adult to the child in question.
Don't assume it is a mom or dad.
The visitor might actually be the child's aunt, grandfather, or even a foster parent.
Find out who you are dealing with. , If there are multiple teachers present, introduce the parent to them.
You can simply say, "Okay, let's get started.
This is Ms.
Smith, Jimmy Smith's mom.
She's here today to talk with us about Jimmy's work in our classes." As each teacher gets a turn to talk to the parent, he or she can introduce herself at that time. , Parents like to hear what their children are doing well.
It should be specific and genuine, however, as parents are already wary and expectant of bad news.
Even if the child is a holy terror, there is something good that can be said of them. "Jimmy really has a lot of friends" or "Jimmy is always surprising us with his unique ideas."
You don't need to be mean, but you shouldn't sugar coat the truth either.
If the student is failing in science, tell the parents why.
Be prepared to show a print out or record of missing assignments, failed quizzes, or whatever the problem is. , For example, if the child isn't keeping up with workbook pages, bring a workbook to show the parents what the child should be doing.
If the child isn't passing tests, bring the study guide you use to show parents what you are giving the students to prepare them for the tests.
Tell the parents briefly about how your class works in respect to the area in which the child is struggling: how often you give homework, what you do to review for a test, how students are required to keep a notebook, or how tests always fall on Fridays. , Write any important information on the top of it, such as due date, or credit possible (50% for late work).
Make any notes on the work about what resource the student should use (pages 3-9 of the social studies book), because if the work is already overdue, chances are the student won't remember how it was supposed to be done. , Encourage them to express their concerns.
During the meeting, pause to ask them questions such as:
Does this make sense? Do you find that this happens at home? What is the best way for me to get in touch with you if I need to let you know more about my concerns? What does your child say about my class? Does he seem to enjoy it? How has he performed in the past with math/etc.? , Education, like any other field, is riddled with acronyms that only make sense to other educators.
Be plain with your communication.
If you must use an acronym, be sure and explain it to the parent (IEP, SST, EIP, MO, ELL, LAB, etc.) , Refer to the notes you took during the meeting, for example: "Okay Ms.
Smith, so what I have understood today is that Ms.
James and I are going to make sure that Jimmy is moved closer to the front of them room in our classes.
Mr.
Ellis is going to be sending some makeup work home in math, and Ms.
Lewis has given you some makeup work today for social studies that you will make sure Jimmy has back by next Monday.
Does this all sound correct?" Be sure and ask at that point if the parent has any questions for anyone. , Express your knowledge that they have taken time out of their busy schedule, and how you wish that all other parents were as conscientious.
Make sure that the parent has knowledge of how to contact you, and that know they are welcome to do so at any time.
Shake hands with them, and lead them to the door. (Make sure they took anything with them that you gave them, such as the makeup work!) , If the student has improved, say so.
If the problems are continuing, the parent needs to know. -
Step 3: Do not bring anything to the meeting that would distract you from the communication at hand.
-
Step 4: Do bring to the meeting anything relevant to the student's involvement in your class.
-
Step 5: Take notes during the meeting.
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Step 6: When the parents arrive
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Step 7: welcome them warmly.
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Step 8: Make sure you know the child's name and are saying it correctly.
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Step 9: Introduce yourself to the parent.
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Step 10: Begin your spiel with something positive.
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Step 11: When you get around to delivering bad news
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Step 12: be truthful.
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Step 13: If you are delivering bad news about grades
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Step 14: show the parent what type of work you are requiring of their child.
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Step 15: If you plan to allow makeup work
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Step 16: show it to the parent at that time.
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Step 17: Be sure and allow the parents time to ask questions or make comments.
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Step 18: Don't use acronyms that parents don't understand.
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Step 19: When you are finished with the meeting
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Step 20: be sure and summarize any steps you and the parent have agreed to take.
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Step 21: Thank the parent for taking the time to meet with you.
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Step 22: In a few weeks
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Step 23: follow up on the conference with an email
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Step 24: note in the student's agenda
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Step 25: letter in the mail
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Step 26: or phone call.
Detailed Guide
Meetings never run as efficiently and quickly as you would think.
What you expect should take twenty minutes will invariably turn into forty.
Don't schedule a parent meeting to occur fifteen minutes before the students come back from lunch.
If other teachers are coming as well, make sure that they remember the time and location through email reminder or note.
Have a plan to quickly locate and retrieve those staff members if they have forgotten. , That includes papers to grade, your water bill, cell phone, or laptop (no surfing the net at this time). , This includes work samples, behavior log, current report card or class average, and details of missing assignments if you plan to allow the child to make up missing work. , Many times there is something discussed that requires one of the people at the meeting to do some follow-up activity.
Don't assume you'll remember what you discussed or promised to do later.
Write it down.
You may want to provide a small pad of paper and pen for parents too, as many of them don't bring anything to write with. , Try to seat yourself next to them rather than across from them.
If there are multiple staff members attending, make sure that you don't physically seat yourselves together apart from the parent.
Try for more of a circular seating pattern than a panel style arrangement.
Parents are already nervous, and many feel intimidated when they are alone in a chair facing a line of teachers. , Hopefully you haven't gotten this far into the year without that knowledge, but be sure of it before you start.
You'll also want to make sure you know the relationship of the visiting adult to the child in question.
Don't assume it is a mom or dad.
The visitor might actually be the child's aunt, grandfather, or even a foster parent.
Find out who you are dealing with. , If there are multiple teachers present, introduce the parent to them.
You can simply say, "Okay, let's get started.
This is Ms.
Smith, Jimmy Smith's mom.
She's here today to talk with us about Jimmy's work in our classes." As each teacher gets a turn to talk to the parent, he or she can introduce herself at that time. , Parents like to hear what their children are doing well.
It should be specific and genuine, however, as parents are already wary and expectant of bad news.
Even if the child is a holy terror, there is something good that can be said of them. "Jimmy really has a lot of friends" or "Jimmy is always surprising us with his unique ideas."
You don't need to be mean, but you shouldn't sugar coat the truth either.
If the student is failing in science, tell the parents why.
Be prepared to show a print out or record of missing assignments, failed quizzes, or whatever the problem is. , For example, if the child isn't keeping up with workbook pages, bring a workbook to show the parents what the child should be doing.
If the child isn't passing tests, bring the study guide you use to show parents what you are giving the students to prepare them for the tests.
Tell the parents briefly about how your class works in respect to the area in which the child is struggling: how often you give homework, what you do to review for a test, how students are required to keep a notebook, or how tests always fall on Fridays. , Write any important information on the top of it, such as due date, or credit possible (50% for late work).
Make any notes on the work about what resource the student should use (pages 3-9 of the social studies book), because if the work is already overdue, chances are the student won't remember how it was supposed to be done. , Encourage them to express their concerns.
During the meeting, pause to ask them questions such as:
Does this make sense? Do you find that this happens at home? What is the best way for me to get in touch with you if I need to let you know more about my concerns? What does your child say about my class? Does he seem to enjoy it? How has he performed in the past with math/etc.? , Education, like any other field, is riddled with acronyms that only make sense to other educators.
Be plain with your communication.
If you must use an acronym, be sure and explain it to the parent (IEP, SST, EIP, MO, ELL, LAB, etc.) , Refer to the notes you took during the meeting, for example: "Okay Ms.
Smith, so what I have understood today is that Ms.
James and I are going to make sure that Jimmy is moved closer to the front of them room in our classes.
Mr.
Ellis is going to be sending some makeup work home in math, and Ms.
Lewis has given you some makeup work today for social studies that you will make sure Jimmy has back by next Monday.
Does this all sound correct?" Be sure and ask at that point if the parent has any questions for anyone. , Express your knowledge that they have taken time out of their busy schedule, and how you wish that all other parents were as conscientious.
Make sure that the parent has knowledge of how to contact you, and that know they are welcome to do so at any time.
Shake hands with them, and lead them to the door. (Make sure they took anything with them that you gave them, such as the makeup work!) , If the student has improved, say so.
If the problems are continuing, the parent needs to know.
About the Author
Rachel Thomas
Writer and educator with a focus on practical practical skills knowledge.
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