How to Respond when Your Child Wants to Quit
Ask your child why they wish to quit., Avoid negative labels on quitting., Discuss alternatives to quitting., Draw a line., Make sure your child understands that you are still proud of them.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Ask your child why they wish to quit.
It is important to understand why your child wants to quit something.
Find out if the activity is too hard, if they are struggling to find balance in their lives, or if there are social reasons that they want to quit.
Also, keep in mind that they may just find the activity unpleasant or boring.You could say something along the lines of “Why have you suddenly decided that you want to quit? I thought you always enjoyed this activity.” -
Step 2: Avoid negative labels on quitting.
Children learn by trying new things.
If there is a stigma around quitting in your household, it will discourage them from trying new things and lock them into things that they do not like.
This will limit their learning experiences and make it less likely that they find an activity that they truly love.For example, saying things like, “Once a quitter, always a quitter,” is not productive or true. , Sometimes the desire to quit arises from difficulties in the activity rather than dislike of it.
In this case, there may be ways to work through the problems and continue the activity.
Have a conversation with your child about how to work it out so that they could continue the activity.For example, if your child wants to quit a sport because it doesn’t leave them time to spend with their friends, you could suggest continuing the sport but spending more time out with friends on the weekends. , While autonomy is important, there may come times that you have to say ‘no.’ Children are not developed enough mentally and emotionally to grasp the severity or long term implications of every decision.
In cases where the decision to quit will seriously harm your child’s future or well-being, it is your responsibility as a parent to make them push through.
When this happens, it is best to give your child a reason that they can’t quit whatever activity is frustrating them.
If possible, show them examples (e.g. statistics on the success of high school dropouts).
For example, if your child wants to quit high school, you should (almost) always say no.
They are likely to be upset with you, but reassure them by saying something like “I know you think this will solve your problems, but I want you to have more opportunities in your future.” , Even if your child does decide to quit, you should support them.
This will show them that you are still proud of them, and you still love them.
This support will give them the confidence needed to try another activity in the future. -
Step 3: Discuss alternatives to quitting.
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Step 4: Draw a line.
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Step 5: Make sure your child understands that you are still proud of them.
Detailed Guide
It is important to understand why your child wants to quit something.
Find out if the activity is too hard, if they are struggling to find balance in their lives, or if there are social reasons that they want to quit.
Also, keep in mind that they may just find the activity unpleasant or boring.You could say something along the lines of “Why have you suddenly decided that you want to quit? I thought you always enjoyed this activity.”
Children learn by trying new things.
If there is a stigma around quitting in your household, it will discourage them from trying new things and lock them into things that they do not like.
This will limit their learning experiences and make it less likely that they find an activity that they truly love.For example, saying things like, “Once a quitter, always a quitter,” is not productive or true. , Sometimes the desire to quit arises from difficulties in the activity rather than dislike of it.
In this case, there may be ways to work through the problems and continue the activity.
Have a conversation with your child about how to work it out so that they could continue the activity.For example, if your child wants to quit a sport because it doesn’t leave them time to spend with their friends, you could suggest continuing the sport but spending more time out with friends on the weekends. , While autonomy is important, there may come times that you have to say ‘no.’ Children are not developed enough mentally and emotionally to grasp the severity or long term implications of every decision.
In cases where the decision to quit will seriously harm your child’s future or well-being, it is your responsibility as a parent to make them push through.
When this happens, it is best to give your child a reason that they can’t quit whatever activity is frustrating them.
If possible, show them examples (e.g. statistics on the success of high school dropouts).
For example, if your child wants to quit high school, you should (almost) always say no.
They are likely to be upset with you, but reassure them by saying something like “I know you think this will solve your problems, but I want you to have more opportunities in your future.” , Even if your child does decide to quit, you should support them.
This will show them that you are still proud of them, and you still love them.
This support will give them the confidence needed to try another activity in the future.
About the Author
Raymond Palmer
Enthusiastic about teaching crafts techniques through clear, step-by-step guides.
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