How to Stay Friends with Non‐Parents After Having Kids
Invite your child-free friends to your child’s birthday parties and events., Ask your friends to babysit or participate in school fundraisers., Plan shared events in kid-friendly venues., Make plans even if you might have to break them., Ask your...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Invite your child-free friends to your child’s birthday parties and events.
You might assume that your friends wouldn’t want to go to a kid’s birthday party or a child-filled holiday celebration, but think again! Your friend is your friend because they love you and want to spend time with you, period.
And if they don’t want to go, they’ll simply decline the invitation.
Either way, it doesn’t hurt to ask, and chances are that your friend will appreciate the invitation as an expression of effort and inclusion.If your friend accepts, you can be extra considerate by providing some adult beverages, having a few other child-free friends in attendance, and making some one-on-one time for your friend at the party. -
Step 2: Ask your friends to babysit or participate in school fundraisers.
Just as a simple party invitation can express your desire to see, include, and embrace your child-free friend, a request for help can also be a meaningful gesture.
You’re showing your friend that you still want them to be a part of your life, even if that life has changed since the time when you first became friends.
Again, if your friend doesn’t want to babysit or help out with a school event, they can always decline, but at least you’ve reached out and tried to include them in your family life.For example, ask your friend to come over while you run an errand or go to a meeting, or see if they’d like to walk around the neighborhood with you and your child to sell candy bars or collect signatures on a petition. , It can seem like adult- and kid-friendly zones are mutually exclusive; families with kids go to parks, bowling alleys, and pizza restaurants, while child-free adults go to bars, clubs, fancy restaurants, and nice house parties.
If you think of it this way, socializing with your child-free friends can seem almost impossible.
But, if you find venues and events which cater to both age groups, you can seamlessly combine family and friend activities.For example, barbecues, camping, and sporting events are great activities equally comfortable for kids, parents, and people without kids. , Some parents find themselves drifting apart from child-free friends because they they think their hectic family schedules won't permit a meet-up.
Rather than risking the need to flake out on a friend, they don’t make any plans at all.
If you do this, though, you guarantee you’ll miss out on friend time, whereas taking the chance can occasionally pan out.If you’re worried that your friend will feel miffed or upset if you have to cancel, talk to them! Chances are, your friend is already more than aware of your demanding schedule, but if you don’t think they’ll understand, be clear about your scheduling issues ahead of time and warn them that you might have to cancel. , Being a parent can mean that you don’t have much time to spend outside of the house.
Whether you live in the country, the suburbs, or the heart of the city, it can be too much of a time crunch to meet your friend for lunch or for a drink at a bar.
Ask instead for your friend to come over to your house so that you can chat and still be at home for the kids.Be sure to appreciate your friend’s effort! After all, they might have preferred to meet at a bar or café just like in the old days, but they’re making the compromise in order to see and catch up with you.
Show your appreciation by supplying the wine and snacks, or buying your friend some flowers or candy. -
Step 3: Plan shared events in kid-friendly venues.
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Step 4: Make plans even if you might have to break them.
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Step 5: Ask your friend to come over if you can’t leave the house.
Detailed Guide
You might assume that your friends wouldn’t want to go to a kid’s birthday party or a child-filled holiday celebration, but think again! Your friend is your friend because they love you and want to spend time with you, period.
And if they don’t want to go, they’ll simply decline the invitation.
Either way, it doesn’t hurt to ask, and chances are that your friend will appreciate the invitation as an expression of effort and inclusion.If your friend accepts, you can be extra considerate by providing some adult beverages, having a few other child-free friends in attendance, and making some one-on-one time for your friend at the party.
Just as a simple party invitation can express your desire to see, include, and embrace your child-free friend, a request for help can also be a meaningful gesture.
You’re showing your friend that you still want them to be a part of your life, even if that life has changed since the time when you first became friends.
Again, if your friend doesn’t want to babysit or help out with a school event, they can always decline, but at least you’ve reached out and tried to include them in your family life.For example, ask your friend to come over while you run an errand or go to a meeting, or see if they’d like to walk around the neighborhood with you and your child to sell candy bars or collect signatures on a petition. , It can seem like adult- and kid-friendly zones are mutually exclusive; families with kids go to parks, bowling alleys, and pizza restaurants, while child-free adults go to bars, clubs, fancy restaurants, and nice house parties.
If you think of it this way, socializing with your child-free friends can seem almost impossible.
But, if you find venues and events which cater to both age groups, you can seamlessly combine family and friend activities.For example, barbecues, camping, and sporting events are great activities equally comfortable for kids, parents, and people without kids. , Some parents find themselves drifting apart from child-free friends because they they think their hectic family schedules won't permit a meet-up.
Rather than risking the need to flake out on a friend, they don’t make any plans at all.
If you do this, though, you guarantee you’ll miss out on friend time, whereas taking the chance can occasionally pan out.If you’re worried that your friend will feel miffed or upset if you have to cancel, talk to them! Chances are, your friend is already more than aware of your demanding schedule, but if you don’t think they’ll understand, be clear about your scheduling issues ahead of time and warn them that you might have to cancel. , Being a parent can mean that you don’t have much time to spend outside of the house.
Whether you live in the country, the suburbs, or the heart of the city, it can be too much of a time crunch to meet your friend for lunch or for a drink at a bar.
Ask instead for your friend to come over to your house so that you can chat and still be at home for the kids.Be sure to appreciate your friend’s effort! After all, they might have preferred to meet at a bar or café just like in the old days, but they’re making the compromise in order to see and catch up with you.
Show your appreciation by supplying the wine and snacks, or buying your friend some flowers or candy.
About the Author
Deborah Williams
Deborah Williams is an experienced writer with over 1 years of expertise in lifestyle and practical guides. Passionate about sharing practical knowledge, Deborah creates easy-to-follow guides that help readers achieve their goals.
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