How to Support a Family Member with a Disability
Pay attention to your family member's needs., Provide need-based assistance., Respond to a request for help or support appropriately., Help your relative acquire any special equipment or resources they might need., Demonstrate love and compassion...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Pay attention to your family member's needs.
Whether you live with the person you’re helping or if you just visit them from time to time, keep an eye on them to see if they need or want physical or emotional assistance.
After all, if you don’t know what’s going on with your family member, you won’t be able to help them.
If the person lives with you, watch them to see if they need help.
If you don’t live with the person, you should call or contact them regularly to see if they’re okay and if they need help.
Always make sure to respect your family member’s privacy and personal space.How closely they need to be monitored depends on their age, needs, and amount of care received from other people.
For example, a young, nonverbal autistic child will need more help than a fully verbal, semi-independent autistic adult. -
Step 2: Provide need-based assistance.
Depending on the specific disability, you can support your family member by offering assistance.
Assistance can come in the form of physical help, emotional support, or short-term/long-term planning.
Tailor your help to the needs you observe or hear about.
For example, if your relative uses a wheelchair and has good hand strength, it would be appropriate to ask if they'd like you to move a chair out of their way, but it wouldn't be appropriate to offer to cut up their food.
If they say they can do it, let them do it, and don't insist on "helping." If offering emotional support, think about spending time doing activities your relative enjoys., A very important part of providing help to a family member with a disability is the way you respond to requests for help from that person.
This is important, because if you don’t respond in an appropriate way, that person won’t feel comfortable asking for help or confiding in you.
If your relative asks for help with a specific activity, try to help them as soon as you can.
Try not to put it off so long that the person no longer needs your help.
Always be polite and gracious when the person asks for assistance.
Avoid saying things like “I’m sort of busy, but I can help.” You don't want them to feel bad for having a disability.
Instead, just say, "Sure, what can I do?" Make sure you are pleasant and seem enthusiastic when you are helping or talking to your relative.
Ultimately, if your relative feels like they are putting you out, they won’t want your support.Keep in mind that it may be difficult and take a lot for them to ask for help. , Your relative might need disability-related resources that they don’t already have.
In this case, you should do what you can to help them get the equipment or resources.
Consider applying for grants for resources or equipment for your relative.
See if your relative is eligible for benefits under Medicare, Medicaid, their health insurance, or other similar parties.
If your relative is a veteran, they might be eligible for equipment or resources from the Veterans Administration.
Help them navigate the bureaucracy of the VA to get their benefits.
Don’t feel obligated to spend money you don’t have., Ultimately, one of the most important things you’ll need to do when helping a family member with a disability is to show that you love and care about them.
Without showing love and compassion, your family member may feel uncomfortable or unhappy.
Try to do little things from time to time that might go above and beyond just help or emotional support.
If you help a person who is immobile get food or go to the doctors, perhaps think about bringing them to their favorite restaurant or bringing them takeout.
Always accept them for who they are.
Don’t dismiss them and don’t dislike them because of their disability.
Try to view your relative as just another person with particular needs or challenges., One of the best ways to support your disabled relative is to plan family events thoughtfully.
Whenever you plan an event, make sure to consider you relative's disability.
Ultimately, you want them to be able to participate in family events just like everyone else.
Consult with your relative or their primary caregiver about what locations work the best or locations that the disabled relative enjoys visiting.
Be thoughtful when planning the time of the event.
If your relative is best able to enjoy and participate in family activities in the morning or in the afternoon, plan for that time of day.
If they have doctors appointments, plan around those appointments.
Pick activities that your family member can most participate.
If they are hard of hearing, avoid noisy restaurants.
If they are immobile, pick an activity that does not require much mobility. -
Step 3: Respond to a request for help or support appropriately.
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Step 4: Help your relative acquire any special equipment or resources they might need.
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Step 5: Demonstrate love and compassion.
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Step 6: Plan family events thoughtfully.
Detailed Guide
Whether you live with the person you’re helping or if you just visit them from time to time, keep an eye on them to see if they need or want physical or emotional assistance.
After all, if you don’t know what’s going on with your family member, you won’t be able to help them.
If the person lives with you, watch them to see if they need help.
If you don’t live with the person, you should call or contact them regularly to see if they’re okay and if they need help.
Always make sure to respect your family member’s privacy and personal space.How closely they need to be monitored depends on their age, needs, and amount of care received from other people.
For example, a young, nonverbal autistic child will need more help than a fully verbal, semi-independent autistic adult.
Depending on the specific disability, you can support your family member by offering assistance.
Assistance can come in the form of physical help, emotional support, or short-term/long-term planning.
Tailor your help to the needs you observe or hear about.
For example, if your relative uses a wheelchair and has good hand strength, it would be appropriate to ask if they'd like you to move a chair out of their way, but it wouldn't be appropriate to offer to cut up their food.
If they say they can do it, let them do it, and don't insist on "helping." If offering emotional support, think about spending time doing activities your relative enjoys., A very important part of providing help to a family member with a disability is the way you respond to requests for help from that person.
This is important, because if you don’t respond in an appropriate way, that person won’t feel comfortable asking for help or confiding in you.
If your relative asks for help with a specific activity, try to help them as soon as you can.
Try not to put it off so long that the person no longer needs your help.
Always be polite and gracious when the person asks for assistance.
Avoid saying things like “I’m sort of busy, but I can help.” You don't want them to feel bad for having a disability.
Instead, just say, "Sure, what can I do?" Make sure you are pleasant and seem enthusiastic when you are helping or talking to your relative.
Ultimately, if your relative feels like they are putting you out, they won’t want your support.Keep in mind that it may be difficult and take a lot for them to ask for help. , Your relative might need disability-related resources that they don’t already have.
In this case, you should do what you can to help them get the equipment or resources.
Consider applying for grants for resources or equipment for your relative.
See if your relative is eligible for benefits under Medicare, Medicaid, their health insurance, or other similar parties.
If your relative is a veteran, they might be eligible for equipment or resources from the Veterans Administration.
Help them navigate the bureaucracy of the VA to get their benefits.
Don’t feel obligated to spend money you don’t have., Ultimately, one of the most important things you’ll need to do when helping a family member with a disability is to show that you love and care about them.
Without showing love and compassion, your family member may feel uncomfortable or unhappy.
Try to do little things from time to time that might go above and beyond just help or emotional support.
If you help a person who is immobile get food or go to the doctors, perhaps think about bringing them to their favorite restaurant or bringing them takeout.
Always accept them for who they are.
Don’t dismiss them and don’t dislike them because of their disability.
Try to view your relative as just another person with particular needs or challenges., One of the best ways to support your disabled relative is to plan family events thoughtfully.
Whenever you plan an event, make sure to consider you relative's disability.
Ultimately, you want them to be able to participate in family events just like everyone else.
Consult with your relative or their primary caregiver about what locations work the best or locations that the disabled relative enjoys visiting.
Be thoughtful when planning the time of the event.
If your relative is best able to enjoy and participate in family activities in the morning or in the afternoon, plan for that time of day.
If they have doctors appointments, plan around those appointments.
Pick activities that your family member can most participate.
If they are hard of hearing, avoid noisy restaurants.
If they are immobile, pick an activity that does not require much mobility.
About the Author
Stephanie Hill
Writer and educator with a focus on practical lifestyle knowledge.
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