How to Teach Your Child Not to Hit Others
Consider normal child development., Learn what causes your child to hit., Remember that being angry is okay.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Consider normal child development.
Babies naturally explore the world through biting and hitting things around them.
Hands and teeth are a child's first social tools.
A child learns to use them to explore the things around them as well as the reactions she gets from others when she uses them.Biting and hitting is most common between the ages of 18 months and 2 1/2 years, while language is still developing.
Biting usually stops as language develops, but hitting often continues for several years into early childhood. -
Step 2: Learn what causes your child to hit.
If your child is hitting in particular environments, such as at a particular child's house or at preschool, take a look at these places to see what might be causing her behavior.
Consider the behavior as a nonverbal communication, and think about what she might be trying to communicate.Most children have shorter tempers when tired.
Consider whether the hitting is happening at a particular time of day or in a limited number of situations.
Consider the possibility that your child is responding to unkind behavior.
Teasing and bullying often occur very subtly, in ways that your child may not be able to communicate.
If this is the situation, you'll need to address those behaviors even as you teach your child alternatives to hitting. , Teaching your child to identify her feelings is important.
Anger, frustration, and jealousy are feelings, and feelings are natural and normal.
Never make your child feel ashamed of having a feeling, even though you are trying to teach her alternative behaviors.Notice how you respond to your own feelings of anger.
Use these moments to help teach your child alternatives to hitting.
For example, if you get angry at someone, use your hand like a puppet. "Okay, hand, you feel angry, but no hitting, okay?" It might feel silly, but your child will get the message.
Using words to identify your feelings will help your child better connect words to his own feelings.
Saying out loud when you're feeling upset, angry or frustrated can help your child learn that these feelings are normal and okay.
Follow up by stating what you're going to do to help yourself feel better.
For example, you might say, "I feel angry, but I'll feel better if I take 5 big breaths." -
Step 3: Remember that being angry is okay.
Detailed Guide
Babies naturally explore the world through biting and hitting things around them.
Hands and teeth are a child's first social tools.
A child learns to use them to explore the things around them as well as the reactions she gets from others when she uses them.Biting and hitting is most common between the ages of 18 months and 2 1/2 years, while language is still developing.
Biting usually stops as language develops, but hitting often continues for several years into early childhood.
If your child is hitting in particular environments, such as at a particular child's house or at preschool, take a look at these places to see what might be causing her behavior.
Consider the behavior as a nonverbal communication, and think about what she might be trying to communicate.Most children have shorter tempers when tired.
Consider whether the hitting is happening at a particular time of day or in a limited number of situations.
Consider the possibility that your child is responding to unkind behavior.
Teasing and bullying often occur very subtly, in ways that your child may not be able to communicate.
If this is the situation, you'll need to address those behaviors even as you teach your child alternatives to hitting. , Teaching your child to identify her feelings is important.
Anger, frustration, and jealousy are feelings, and feelings are natural and normal.
Never make your child feel ashamed of having a feeling, even though you are trying to teach her alternative behaviors.Notice how you respond to your own feelings of anger.
Use these moments to help teach your child alternatives to hitting.
For example, if you get angry at someone, use your hand like a puppet. "Okay, hand, you feel angry, but no hitting, okay?" It might feel silly, but your child will get the message.
Using words to identify your feelings will help your child better connect words to his own feelings.
Saying out loud when you're feeling upset, angry or frustrated can help your child learn that these feelings are normal and okay.
Follow up by stating what you're going to do to help yourself feel better.
For example, you might say, "I feel angry, but I'll feel better if I take 5 big breaths."
About the Author
Deborah Davis
Dedicated to helping readers learn new skills in practical skills and beyond.
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