How to Tell Your Parents You Think You're Autistic
Learn about autism., Do a lot of research., Learn about conditions that could be mistaken for autism., Reflect upon what you've read., Consider your childhood and your earliest memories., Talk to real autistic people.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Learn about autism.
Autism is a very complex and misunderstood disability, so you need to do a lot of research before you can determine whether you may be on the spectrum.
Read lists of symptoms and essays by autistic people.
Autistic people are the best source, because they have firsthand experience with how their brains work, and some stereotypes are wildly inaccurate.
Unusual social behavior (such as accidentally saying rude things or laughing when inappropriate).
May not want cuddling.
Uneven physical or verbal skills.
For example, poor handwriting or bad coordination.
Avoidance of eye contact,staring, or unusual eye contact May prefer to be alone.
Intense focus and large memory, especially when studying favorite things; may remember childhood well Difficulty with forming or understanding spoken words.
May struggle with forming coherent sentences, and prefer written words, sign language, typing, or other forms of communication.
Passion about a few unusual subjects of interest.
Preference of routines and sameness.
Remarkable honesty and loyalty.
Idiosyncratic speech: echoing words or phrases,flat or singsong tone of voice, unusual pitch, and/or artistic and abstract language.
Exaggerated response or little response to sound, light, smell, taste, etc.
Interest in how things work.
Stimming behaviors (e.g. hand flapping, rocking, tapping pencils, hugging oneself, clapping hands, jumping, spinning) Strong sense of justice and morality.
Difficulty reading faces and interacting with others.
Social confusion/cluelessness. -
Step 2: Do a lot of research.
Reading one article on autism isn't enough to get a good sense.
Read the diagnostic criteria, delve into the Autistic community online, and read how autistics describe autism.
Reflect as you read.
Does it fit you? Research related and comorbid conditions.
Is it possible that you have any of these in addition to autism, or instead of autism? Keep in mind that autism is not perfectly understood.
There is still misinformation out there, and there are studies with contradictory and unclear conclusions.
Some information is written by non-autistic people who never consulted any autistics, and thus may have gotten something wrong. , ADHD, reactive attachment disorder, social anxiety, avoidant personality disorder, OCD, and schizophrenia are examples of disabilities that can look somewhat similar to autism.It's possible to be autistic and have one of these disabilities.
For example, it isn't uncommon for autistic people to have ADHD. , Think back on your childhood, your quirks, your needs, and the accommodations that you and others make for you.
When you consider autism, do things start to make more sense? Or is it a poor fit? , Did you walk in circles, line up your toys, or make unusual repetitive movements? Did you hit your milestones in an unusual order? (This includes early childhood, and also later childhood, such as learning to bike or swim.) Reflect on your childhood and see if autism explains any of your quirks, strengths, or struggles. , Visit a disability club, read blogs, or use #AskAnAutistic to ask about autism.
You can even talk about the autistic traits you've noticed in yourself, and ask if they think it's a possibility.
It's considered bad manners to post in #ActuallyAutistic unless you are either diagnosed or quite sure that you're autistic.
However, anyone is welcome to read, listen, and learn. -
Step 3: Learn about conditions that could be mistaken for autism.
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Step 4: Reflect upon what you've read.
-
Step 5: Consider your childhood and your earliest memories.
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Step 6: Talk to real autistic people.
Detailed Guide
Autism is a very complex and misunderstood disability, so you need to do a lot of research before you can determine whether you may be on the spectrum.
Read lists of symptoms and essays by autistic people.
Autistic people are the best source, because they have firsthand experience with how their brains work, and some stereotypes are wildly inaccurate.
Unusual social behavior (such as accidentally saying rude things or laughing when inappropriate).
May not want cuddling.
Uneven physical or verbal skills.
For example, poor handwriting or bad coordination.
Avoidance of eye contact,staring, or unusual eye contact May prefer to be alone.
Intense focus and large memory, especially when studying favorite things; may remember childhood well Difficulty with forming or understanding spoken words.
May struggle with forming coherent sentences, and prefer written words, sign language, typing, or other forms of communication.
Passion about a few unusual subjects of interest.
Preference of routines and sameness.
Remarkable honesty and loyalty.
Idiosyncratic speech: echoing words or phrases,flat or singsong tone of voice, unusual pitch, and/or artistic and abstract language.
Exaggerated response or little response to sound, light, smell, taste, etc.
Interest in how things work.
Stimming behaviors (e.g. hand flapping, rocking, tapping pencils, hugging oneself, clapping hands, jumping, spinning) Strong sense of justice and morality.
Difficulty reading faces and interacting with others.
Social confusion/cluelessness.
Reading one article on autism isn't enough to get a good sense.
Read the diagnostic criteria, delve into the Autistic community online, and read how autistics describe autism.
Reflect as you read.
Does it fit you? Research related and comorbid conditions.
Is it possible that you have any of these in addition to autism, or instead of autism? Keep in mind that autism is not perfectly understood.
There is still misinformation out there, and there are studies with contradictory and unclear conclusions.
Some information is written by non-autistic people who never consulted any autistics, and thus may have gotten something wrong. , ADHD, reactive attachment disorder, social anxiety, avoidant personality disorder, OCD, and schizophrenia are examples of disabilities that can look somewhat similar to autism.It's possible to be autistic and have one of these disabilities.
For example, it isn't uncommon for autistic people to have ADHD. , Think back on your childhood, your quirks, your needs, and the accommodations that you and others make for you.
When you consider autism, do things start to make more sense? Or is it a poor fit? , Did you walk in circles, line up your toys, or make unusual repetitive movements? Did you hit your milestones in an unusual order? (This includes early childhood, and also later childhood, such as learning to bike or swim.) Reflect on your childhood and see if autism explains any of your quirks, strengths, or struggles. , Visit a disability club, read blogs, or use #AskAnAutistic to ask about autism.
You can even talk about the autistic traits you've noticed in yourself, and ask if they think it's a possibility.
It's considered bad manners to post in #ActuallyAutistic unless you are either diagnosed or quite sure that you're autistic.
However, anyone is welcome to read, listen, and learn.
About the Author
Heather Long
Experienced content creator specializing in home improvement guides and tutorials.
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