How to Be a Walking Contradiction

Step-by-Step Guide

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   Step 1: Never let your clothing reflect who you are!

   If you're sporty, start wearing skinny jeans and trench coats.
   
   If you're a happy person, dress in black, and dye your hair red, the color of blood. , Most contradictions don't wear pants! If you wear pants, you'll be a double contradiction! People will never know whether to call you a contradiction or a parrot head! , Hate on Justin Bieber, act like you have no idea what a dusty beaver is. ,,, Tell people it's against your religion; if they ask what religion tell them you're an agnostic atheist, or a Christian atheist.
   
   If they're over sixteen, they might actually know what this means and question you about it. , You may want to start wearing trench pants and puffy red sweaters. ,
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   Step 2: Keep your pants on!

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   Step 3: Claim you hate bands and singers such as The Black Eyed Peas and Selena Gomez but when you hear one of their songs

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   Step 4: loudly announce that you've been waiting all day for this song to come on.

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   Step 5: Buy all your clothing from the mall

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   Step 6: but never buy brand name clothing.

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   Step 7: Make a point to wear sunglasses on cloudy days

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   Step 8: and only wear sandals and flip-flops in the winter or on school days.

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   Step 9: Refuse to wear socks on Thursdays.

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    Step 10: Never let your clothing reflect your personality.

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    Step 11: Consider dying your hair the opposite of its natural colour.

Detailed Guide

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