How to Accept and Deal with People Labeling You as a Lesbian
Ignore stereotypes., Stay calm., Cope with negativity., Stay safe., Surround yourself with positive people.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Ignore stereotypes.
You could be labeled as a lesbian because you don’t fit in with stereotypes people have about women, or because you do fit in with stereotypes people have about lesbians.
How you express yourself, what you wear, and what activities you enjoy are up to you.Ignore the many stereotypes about women that you may not conform to, even if they might contribute to people labeling you.Remember that:
Women aren’t weak.
Women can play any sports just as well as men, and this doesn’t mean they’re lesbians.
Women don’t have to be submissive or quiet.
Women don’t have to be pretty and slender to be feminine.
Women can be leaders. -
Step 2: Stay calm.
In moments of conflict when you’re confronted with being called a lesbian, check-in with your body.
Notice any tight sensations or difficulty breathing.If you want to relieve stress quickly in the moment to avoid a fight or a confrontation, focus on your senses.
For example, you may focus on sound by putting your headphones on to listen to your favorite song.
Or you may focus on movement by getting up to go for a walk.
You could also try focusing on touch by giving yourself a quick neck or shoulder rub.Deep breathing is easy to do and effective as well.
It helps activate the body's calming response.If the stress of the label is getting to you more than just in the moment, practice self-care and stress management regularly.
Try talking to someone who is supportive and who listens well.
Take care of yourself well by getting around seven to nine hours of sleep every night, exercising 20 to 30 minutes a day, and eating regular, healthy meals.
Avoid using alcohol or other drugs to mask your stress and frustration., You may display signs of anger, hurt feelings, or confusion because of someone calling you a lesbian.
However, despite your response, some people may continue to bully you, label you, and remain ignorant.
Know when to move on.
Some people may never be able to understand or accept who you are.Therefore, you may have to cut down on your interactions with this person or avoid the person entirely to avoid being labeled.
Stand up for yourself, but remember that you can’t change someone’s beliefs or opinions.
Choose your battles.
Make sure fighting the label is really worth your time and energy, particularly if the other person is not going to agree with you.Forgive and understand where the other person is coming from.
Holding a grudge will only be more draining.Be compassionate and realize that them labeling you may come from their own insecurities about sexuality or gender. , If the person who is labeling you becomes increasingly aggressive or starts to bully you, be sure to have other people nearby.
Make sure others are aware of the situation.
Keep your cell phone with you at all times.
If the person starts coming towards you and threatens your physical safety, dial 911 right away and try your best to secure your safety.
Move yourself to a safe location.
For example, you may want to have a few friends nearby to back you up or you may tell a school administrator what’s been going on., If someone continues to label you as a lesbian and ignore how it’s making you feel, limit the time you’re around them or avoid them entirely.
Focus on building relationships with good friends, which will improve your resiliency in times of stress and help you better cope with negativity and labels.Develop a support group of good friends who accept you for who you are.
Good friends will be objective, encouraging, and non-judgmental.
They’ll listen and may even be able to provide you with new ways of looking at the situation.Work on cultivating your relationships with people who genuinely care about you and support you.
Explore clubs and groups that are more in line with your interests.
This will get you involved with people who hopefully share similar views as you, or people who are more accepting. -
Step 3: Cope with negativity.
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Step 4: Stay safe.
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Step 5: Surround yourself with positive people.
Detailed Guide
You could be labeled as a lesbian because you don’t fit in with stereotypes people have about women, or because you do fit in with stereotypes people have about lesbians.
How you express yourself, what you wear, and what activities you enjoy are up to you.Ignore the many stereotypes about women that you may not conform to, even if they might contribute to people labeling you.Remember that:
Women aren’t weak.
Women can play any sports just as well as men, and this doesn’t mean they’re lesbians.
Women don’t have to be submissive or quiet.
Women don’t have to be pretty and slender to be feminine.
Women can be leaders.
In moments of conflict when you’re confronted with being called a lesbian, check-in with your body.
Notice any tight sensations or difficulty breathing.If you want to relieve stress quickly in the moment to avoid a fight or a confrontation, focus on your senses.
For example, you may focus on sound by putting your headphones on to listen to your favorite song.
Or you may focus on movement by getting up to go for a walk.
You could also try focusing on touch by giving yourself a quick neck or shoulder rub.Deep breathing is easy to do and effective as well.
It helps activate the body's calming response.If the stress of the label is getting to you more than just in the moment, practice self-care and stress management regularly.
Try talking to someone who is supportive and who listens well.
Take care of yourself well by getting around seven to nine hours of sleep every night, exercising 20 to 30 minutes a day, and eating regular, healthy meals.
Avoid using alcohol or other drugs to mask your stress and frustration., You may display signs of anger, hurt feelings, or confusion because of someone calling you a lesbian.
However, despite your response, some people may continue to bully you, label you, and remain ignorant.
Know when to move on.
Some people may never be able to understand or accept who you are.Therefore, you may have to cut down on your interactions with this person or avoid the person entirely to avoid being labeled.
Stand up for yourself, but remember that you can’t change someone’s beliefs or opinions.
Choose your battles.
Make sure fighting the label is really worth your time and energy, particularly if the other person is not going to agree with you.Forgive and understand where the other person is coming from.
Holding a grudge will only be more draining.Be compassionate and realize that them labeling you may come from their own insecurities about sexuality or gender. , If the person who is labeling you becomes increasingly aggressive or starts to bully you, be sure to have other people nearby.
Make sure others are aware of the situation.
Keep your cell phone with you at all times.
If the person starts coming towards you and threatens your physical safety, dial 911 right away and try your best to secure your safety.
Move yourself to a safe location.
For example, you may want to have a few friends nearby to back you up or you may tell a school administrator what’s been going on., If someone continues to label you as a lesbian and ignore how it’s making you feel, limit the time you’re around them or avoid them entirely.
Focus on building relationships with good friends, which will improve your resiliency in times of stress and help you better cope with negativity and labels.Develop a support group of good friends who accept you for who you are.
Good friends will be objective, encouraging, and non-judgmental.
They’ll listen and may even be able to provide you with new ways of looking at the situation.Work on cultivating your relationships with people who genuinely care about you and support you.
Explore clubs and groups that are more in line with your interests.
This will get you involved with people who hopefully share similar views as you, or people who are more accepting.
About the Author
Amy Diaz
Creates helpful guides on crafts to inspire and educate readers.
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