How to Approach Women in Bars

Make eye contact with the girl you want to talk to., Smile, and see if she smiles back., Read her body language., Walk up to her in a non-threatening manner and introduce yourself., Ask her if she’ll let you buy her her favorite drink., Sit next to...

7 Steps 3 min read Medium

Step-by-Step Guide

  1. Step 1: Make eye contact with the girl you want to talk to.

    A great way to let someone know that you’re interested in them is by making eye contact with them.

    Make sure not to stare for a long period of time, or it may come off as creepy.

    She may not notice you the first time around, but don’t get discouraged.

    Make sure you’re in her view, and try to catch her when she’s looking in your direction.

    If a girl makes eye contact with you but her face remains rigid, confused, disgusted, or expressionless, there’s a good chance she’s not the one to approach.

    If a girl makes eye contact with more than 2 or 3 times in a row, there’s a good chance she’s interested in you.Research shows that those who are in love tend to stare into each other's eyes for longer periods of time.
  2. Step 2: and see if she smiles back.

    All smiles are not created equal.

    The kind of smile you’re looking for is a genuine smile that uses the muscles in her eyes and her mouth, otherwise known as a Duchenne smile.

    Some women just smile at others to seem non-threatening or polite, not as an invitation to talk.

    People smile more often when they see someone they find attractive.Smiling will also make you more approachable., Are her arms crossed, is she avoiding eye contact, or pointing away from you? These are all signs that she is not interested.A woman who is interested in engaging you will often have a straighter posture, with her knees pointed in your direction.

    If the girl preens or touches her hair, this is also a sign that she’s into you., Never approach a girl from behind or engage in physical contact when you don’t know her.

    This can disgust them, and ruin your chances of talking to them for the rest of the night.

    Instead, approach her so she can see you, and maintain a smile as you walk up to her.

    Do not walk directly towards her like you have a mission.

    Instead walk in her direction, but make approaching her seem natural and not forced.Things to say include, “Hi,” “Hey,” “Are you having fun?,” or “I saw you at the other end of the bar.” You do not need an elaborate pick-up line, and some girls even find them corny. , A good excuse to begin a conversation is to talk over drinks.

    It’s also a friendly gesture that she will appreciate.

    Always make sure to ask her what kind of drink she wants before buying one.

    If she refuses and seems uncomfortable, you should walk away.

    If the girl takes the drink but then doesn’t seem interested in talking, you need to accept that.

    Not all girls want to talk., Take a seat next to her if she accepts the drink and it seems like she wants to talk.

    Try to find common interests.

    You can pull from your surroundings like the city and town you’re in, the bar you’re patronizing, or a local sports team.

    Try to figure out the type of person she is, and talk about what she’s interested in. , Practicing these techniques outside of a bar or club situation is ideal because it will acclimate you to doing it in low-stress situations.

    Try out this method at the grocery store, shopping mall, or in school in order to meet new friends.

    Trying it out in a low-stress situation to a woman that you aren't interested in will allow you to practice without fearing rejection.
  3. Step 3: Read her body language.

  4. Step 4: Walk up to her in a non-threatening manner and introduce yourself.

  5. Step 5: Ask her if she’ll let you buy her her favorite drink.

  6. Step 6: Sit next to her and try to find common interests.

  7. Step 7: Practice the technique wherever you go.

Detailed Guide

A great way to let someone know that you’re interested in them is by making eye contact with them.

Make sure not to stare for a long period of time, or it may come off as creepy.

She may not notice you the first time around, but don’t get discouraged.

Make sure you’re in her view, and try to catch her when she’s looking in your direction.

If a girl makes eye contact with you but her face remains rigid, confused, disgusted, or expressionless, there’s a good chance she’s not the one to approach.

If a girl makes eye contact with more than 2 or 3 times in a row, there’s a good chance she’s interested in you.Research shows that those who are in love tend to stare into each other's eyes for longer periods of time.

All smiles are not created equal.

The kind of smile you’re looking for is a genuine smile that uses the muscles in her eyes and her mouth, otherwise known as a Duchenne smile.

Some women just smile at others to seem non-threatening or polite, not as an invitation to talk.

People smile more often when they see someone they find attractive.Smiling will also make you more approachable., Are her arms crossed, is she avoiding eye contact, or pointing away from you? These are all signs that she is not interested.A woman who is interested in engaging you will often have a straighter posture, with her knees pointed in your direction.

If the girl preens or touches her hair, this is also a sign that she’s into you., Never approach a girl from behind or engage in physical contact when you don’t know her.

This can disgust them, and ruin your chances of talking to them for the rest of the night.

Instead, approach her so she can see you, and maintain a smile as you walk up to her.

Do not walk directly towards her like you have a mission.

Instead walk in her direction, but make approaching her seem natural and not forced.Things to say include, “Hi,” “Hey,” “Are you having fun?,” or “I saw you at the other end of the bar.” You do not need an elaborate pick-up line, and some girls even find them corny. , A good excuse to begin a conversation is to talk over drinks.

It’s also a friendly gesture that she will appreciate.

Always make sure to ask her what kind of drink she wants before buying one.

If she refuses and seems uncomfortable, you should walk away.

If the girl takes the drink but then doesn’t seem interested in talking, you need to accept that.

Not all girls want to talk., Take a seat next to her if she accepts the drink and it seems like she wants to talk.

Try to find common interests.

You can pull from your surroundings like the city and town you’re in, the bar you’re patronizing, or a local sports team.

Try to figure out the type of person she is, and talk about what she’s interested in. , Practicing these techniques outside of a bar or club situation is ideal because it will acclimate you to doing it in low-stress situations.

Try out this method at the grocery store, shopping mall, or in school in order to meet new friends.

Trying it out in a low-stress situation to a woman that you aren't interested in will allow you to practice without fearing rejection.

About the Author

J

Jeffrey Watson

A passionate writer with expertise in cooking topics. Loves sharing practical knowledge.

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