How to Be Less Clingy
Build your confidence., Work on your trust issues., Ease your anxiety., Talk to someone.
Step-by-Step Guide
-
Step 1: Build your confidence.
A lot of people are clingy because they are unhappy with who they are and feel insecure about being alone, being left behind, or being ignored.
Clingy people can even become overly paranoid that people are hanging out without them because they think that nobody may really like them in the end.
Get over these feelings and work on loving who you are.
If you're confident, then you won't be obsessed with people leaving you and will be less clingy.
Think of at least three things that make you special.
Learn to love yourself.
Take pleasure in being good at something, whether it's running, the hard work you do, or your ability to make people laugh.
Have the body language of a confident person.
Stand tall with your arms away from your chest, and smile as much as you can.
Work on addressing your flaws.
Everyone has flaws, and addressing them will make you feel better about yourself. -
Step 2: Work on your trust issues.
Many people are clingy because they have trust issues, whether they stem from feeling abandoned as a child, being ditched by a former best friend, or even being cheated on by a former significant other.
These causes must have been very painful, but you need to learn that you should approach each new relationship on its own terms, and that the past cannot dictate the present.
Learn to let go of the people or situations that hurt you in the past, and look toward building a better, healthier future of fulfilling relationships.
Tell yourself that clinging to people is not the way to make them be more loyal to you
-- in fact, clinging to someone is much more likely to push him or her away.
Don't be frustrated with yourself.
You can't resolve all of your trust issues overnight
-- but you can take baby steps that make you feel more open to trusting people without being by their side all the time. , A lot of clingy behavior is rooted in anxiety
-- you may be anxious about being alone forever, anxious about not having a best friend, or anxious that people are laughing at you behind your back the second you leave the room.
You may also just be anxious about trying to navigate multiple or new relationships, so you stick to the person or few people that you know well to deal with your fear of the unknown.
A lot of anxiety is mixed with stress
-- you may be feeling anxious because your world is so crazy and busy and you have so much on your plate that you feel like you can't handle it on your own.
Take some steps to reduce stress, like meditating, doing yoga, and maintaining a healthy sleep schedule, and see if you feel less anxious.
Before you walk into a room full of people, just take a few deep breaths.
Tell yourself that it's okay to talk to new people and to branch out instead of being glued to the person you're with. , If you feel so clingy that you're dependent on your mother's, boyfriend's, or best friend's every move, then you may need to talk to someone about your problem.
You can start by opening up to a close friend, significant other, or family member about your problems.
If you feel out of control, you can talk to a doctor or therapist and see if your problems are linked to an anxiety disorder or depression.
Talking to someone can help you look for the root causes of your clingy nature.
There are many reasons for being clingy
-- maybe you grew up in a house full of rambunctious siblings and were fighting a losing battle for attention, or maybe you ended a relationship with a loved one because you weren't invested enough and are over correcting. -
Step 3: Ease your anxiety.
-
Step 4: Talk to someone.
Detailed Guide
A lot of people are clingy because they are unhappy with who they are and feel insecure about being alone, being left behind, or being ignored.
Clingy people can even become overly paranoid that people are hanging out without them because they think that nobody may really like them in the end.
Get over these feelings and work on loving who you are.
If you're confident, then you won't be obsessed with people leaving you and will be less clingy.
Think of at least three things that make you special.
Learn to love yourself.
Take pleasure in being good at something, whether it's running, the hard work you do, or your ability to make people laugh.
Have the body language of a confident person.
Stand tall with your arms away from your chest, and smile as much as you can.
Work on addressing your flaws.
Everyone has flaws, and addressing them will make you feel better about yourself.
Many people are clingy because they have trust issues, whether they stem from feeling abandoned as a child, being ditched by a former best friend, or even being cheated on by a former significant other.
These causes must have been very painful, but you need to learn that you should approach each new relationship on its own terms, and that the past cannot dictate the present.
Learn to let go of the people or situations that hurt you in the past, and look toward building a better, healthier future of fulfilling relationships.
Tell yourself that clinging to people is not the way to make them be more loyal to you
-- in fact, clinging to someone is much more likely to push him or her away.
Don't be frustrated with yourself.
You can't resolve all of your trust issues overnight
-- but you can take baby steps that make you feel more open to trusting people without being by their side all the time. , A lot of clingy behavior is rooted in anxiety
-- you may be anxious about being alone forever, anxious about not having a best friend, or anxious that people are laughing at you behind your back the second you leave the room.
You may also just be anxious about trying to navigate multiple or new relationships, so you stick to the person or few people that you know well to deal with your fear of the unknown.
A lot of anxiety is mixed with stress
-- you may be feeling anxious because your world is so crazy and busy and you have so much on your plate that you feel like you can't handle it on your own.
Take some steps to reduce stress, like meditating, doing yoga, and maintaining a healthy sleep schedule, and see if you feel less anxious.
Before you walk into a room full of people, just take a few deep breaths.
Tell yourself that it's okay to talk to new people and to branch out instead of being glued to the person you're with. , If you feel so clingy that you're dependent on your mother's, boyfriend's, or best friend's every move, then you may need to talk to someone about your problem.
You can start by opening up to a close friend, significant other, or family member about your problems.
If you feel out of control, you can talk to a doctor or therapist and see if your problems are linked to an anxiety disorder or depression.
Talking to someone can help you look for the root causes of your clingy nature.
There are many reasons for being clingy
-- maybe you grew up in a house full of rambunctious siblings and were fighting a losing battle for attention, or maybe you ended a relationship with a loved one because you weren't invested enough and are over correcting.
About the Author
Claire Sanders
A passionate writer with expertise in cooking topics. Loves sharing practical knowledge.
Rate This Guide
How helpful was this guide? Click to rate: