How to Be Socially Awkward

Step-by-Step Guide

1. 1

   Step 1: Eye contact.

   Excessive eye contact is a winner, it is a guaranteed way to create an uncomfortable atmosphere.
   
   Make sure you stare the subject down, in the most paranoid way possible, and look down to the ground every 5-7 seconds.
   
   A lack of eye contact can work too.
   
   Even try to combine the two to become the most awkward being within a 10 mile (16 km) radius.
   
   Try flaring your nose and looking and smiling a weird smile.
   
   Also, try your hardest not to blink try to blink maybe, every 25 seconds.
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   Step 2: Posture.

   Looking rigid and uncomfortable is key in being an awkward member of society.
   
   The best way to achieve this goal is by standing in a position as if you are holding in a fierce bout of flatulence.
   
   Even try looking worried whilst holding in the fart, as if it is going to be released at any given moment--this will add to the awkwardness. , Start with something small like Do pushups right in the middle street or any other place where there are people like library, offices, restaurants.
   
   Do anything which is not normal socially like jumping jacks, lie down in the middle of the curb or sidewalk, dance in the street. , An unusual appearance is a brilliant way to create social awkwardness.
   
   Try things like tucking your shirt as far into your trousers as possible, wearing trousers that significantly divorce your ankles, or simply, wearing no trousers at all.
   
   If you have a polo or a button down t-shirt, button it all the way to the top.
   
   If you have long hair, tie it into a tight ponytail. if you have short hair, gel it into a nerdy combover. , Speaking unusually can create an awkward and unsettling mood.
   
   Developing a stutter is one way of achieving this, and another great way to be a socially awkward person during conversation is pretending not to hear the other person and saying "What?"
   
   sharply and loudly, midway through the subjects' sentence.
   
   Watch the subject pause and befuddle around their sentence, after you have interrupted them.
   
   Also, laugh as loud and horribly as you can every time they finish a sentence. , Stand no further than 4 inches (10.2 cm) away from another human.
   
   This will create an environment so awkward that all of the subjects to your awkward persona will cringe in united embarrassment.
   
   Whisper in their ear and say stuff like "Do you like my breath?" This will be perfectly awkward. ,, Say stuff like "I can belly dance!" and start waving your arms around and try waving your body. , Pretend you've got a point to make, or were about to say something, but then 'forget' what it was.
   
   A good way to do this is to randomly spurt out an incoherent noise, but then when they ask you to repeat what you said, say it doesn't matter.
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   Step 3: Do stupid things: One of the greatest advantage of doing socially awkward things is to get an 'I don't care what you think about me' attitude.

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   Step 4: Appearance.

5. 5

   Step 5: Dialect.

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   Step 6: Invade personal space as much as possible.

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   Step 7: Poking people with your index finger

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   Step 8: pencils

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   Step 9: and juice boxes will add an extra awkwardness to the situation.

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    Step 10: Be random during conversations.

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    Step 11: Interrupt them but then forget what you were going to say.

Detailed Guide

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