How to Become a Nicer Person to Others
Use a relaxation techniques to calm yourself., Challenge unrealistic statements or thoughts., Improve your problem solving skills., Don't let frustration or anger build up., Channel your energy into something positive., Walk away when you start to...
Step-by-Step Guide
-
Step 1: Use a relaxation techniques to calm yourself.
As soon as you start to notice that you are feeling angry, take a moment to calm yourself.
One good way to do this is by using a relaxation technique.Some options include:
Deep breathing.
Progressive muscle relaxation.
Listening to soothing music.
Taking a walk.
Meditation. -
Step 2: Challenge unrealistic statements or thoughts.
Unrealistic thought patterns can intensify feelings of anger, so try to identify and challenge these as they occur.For example, an unrealistic thought might be something like, “My roommate never does anything to help keep our apartment clean! I do everything!” Before you allow yourself to get angrier due to this thought, take a moment to decide if this is really true.
Does your roommate do different things than you do to keep the apartment clean? If so, then the word “never” in this statement is not realistic.
Try rewriting the thought or statement into something more realistic, such as “I wish my roommate would pitch in a little more than she does with household chores.” , Having good problem solving skills can also help to reduce feelings of anger and frustration.
It may help you to feel more in control, even if you are dealing with something really frustrating.
This is a skill that takes time to develop, so try to be patient.When you are facing a problem, try taking time to identify the problem before you try to solve it.
Then, make a list of all the possible solutions available to you and choose the best one.
After putting your solution into action, reflect on how it went and see how you can adjust your strategy for a better result in the future. , When you don't say anything, and you're frustrated, bottling up your anger is not the best thing to do.
Instead of letting frustration build to rage, speak up and confront the source of your frustration.
Don't be afraid of making a situation awkward, because talking it out is better than being mean in the future.
If you've felt disrespected or hurt by someone, you may want to inflict the same emotional pain upon them.
Instead of doing this, let them know that they hurt your feelings and that you felt disrespected by their actions.
Instead of letting your anger build, let the person know what they did wrong.
Say something like "I don't like that you did that.
It really makes me angry and upset."
Instead of using your energy to be mean to others, redirect it to a sport or hobby that you want to pursue.
Make sure to stay active.
When you exercise or do something active, it releases positive endorphins in your brain that make you happier.You can do a team sport like football, baseball, soccer, or hockey.
If you don't like physical sports, try doing something creative like learning how to play an instrument or learning how to paint. , Identify when your anger starts to escalate and be aware of how mad you are.
When you feel like you're reaching that place, take a step back from the argument and walk away.Be polite and explain why you're walking away.
Don't leave the situation up in the air forever.
Regain your composure and talk to the person again when your anger has subsided.
You can say, "I need to take a walk because I'm getting really angry and I'm trying to stay calm.
I need some time to think about this, but we can talk when I get back." -
Step 3: Improve your problem solving skills.
-
Step 4: Don't let frustration or anger build up.
-
Step 5: Channel your energy into something positive.
-
Step 6: Walk away when you start to get angry.
Detailed Guide
As soon as you start to notice that you are feeling angry, take a moment to calm yourself.
One good way to do this is by using a relaxation technique.Some options include:
Deep breathing.
Progressive muscle relaxation.
Listening to soothing music.
Taking a walk.
Meditation.
Unrealistic thought patterns can intensify feelings of anger, so try to identify and challenge these as they occur.For example, an unrealistic thought might be something like, “My roommate never does anything to help keep our apartment clean! I do everything!” Before you allow yourself to get angrier due to this thought, take a moment to decide if this is really true.
Does your roommate do different things than you do to keep the apartment clean? If so, then the word “never” in this statement is not realistic.
Try rewriting the thought or statement into something more realistic, such as “I wish my roommate would pitch in a little more than she does with household chores.” , Having good problem solving skills can also help to reduce feelings of anger and frustration.
It may help you to feel more in control, even if you are dealing with something really frustrating.
This is a skill that takes time to develop, so try to be patient.When you are facing a problem, try taking time to identify the problem before you try to solve it.
Then, make a list of all the possible solutions available to you and choose the best one.
After putting your solution into action, reflect on how it went and see how you can adjust your strategy for a better result in the future. , When you don't say anything, and you're frustrated, bottling up your anger is not the best thing to do.
Instead of letting frustration build to rage, speak up and confront the source of your frustration.
Don't be afraid of making a situation awkward, because talking it out is better than being mean in the future.
If you've felt disrespected or hurt by someone, you may want to inflict the same emotional pain upon them.
Instead of doing this, let them know that they hurt your feelings and that you felt disrespected by their actions.
Instead of letting your anger build, let the person know what they did wrong.
Say something like "I don't like that you did that.
It really makes me angry and upset."
Instead of using your energy to be mean to others, redirect it to a sport or hobby that you want to pursue.
Make sure to stay active.
When you exercise or do something active, it releases positive endorphins in your brain that make you happier.You can do a team sport like football, baseball, soccer, or hockey.
If you don't like physical sports, try doing something creative like learning how to play an instrument or learning how to paint. , Identify when your anger starts to escalate and be aware of how mad you are.
When you feel like you're reaching that place, take a step back from the argument and walk away.Be polite and explain why you're walking away.
Don't leave the situation up in the air forever.
Regain your composure and talk to the person again when your anger has subsided.
You can say, "I need to take a walk because I'm getting really angry and I'm trying to stay calm.
I need some time to think about this, but we can talk when I get back."
About the Author
Jerry Reynolds
Committed to making lifestyle accessible and understandable for everyone.
Rate This Guide
How helpful was this guide? Click to rate: