How to Behave After Sex
Let the intimacy of the moment fade gradually., Enjoy some time in silence if the conversation feels awkward., Keep any conversation candid and casual., Tell your partner things that you liked, but be brief., Cuddle with a movie, TV, or music if...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Let the intimacy of the moment fade gradually.
Just because you’ve enjoyed yourselves doesn’t mean that the feeling of intimacy should end when the sex does.
Put another way – you use foreplay to gradually ramp up the sexual attraction, and you should use the time afterward to gently return to the “real world.” The biggest mistake people make after sex is getting up and leaving as soon as it is over, destroying all of the intimacy you’ve built together.There is no rule saying you have to talk right after sex.
Spooning, cuddling, or even holding hands is a good way to slowly relax back into everyday life.
If you want to put some clothes back on, keep it casual (underwear, sweats, pajamas, etc.) and hop back into bed.
You don’t need to stay naked if it makes you feel uncomfortable.
Turn off the phone—no one wants to feel like their partner would rather talk to someone else.
Stay out of the kitchen – it is natural to feel hungry after sex, but that doesn’t mean your first comment should be “I could use some food.” Stay awake—falling asleep right after sex will make your partner feel disrespected, used, and unloved. -
Step 2: Enjoy some time in silence if the conversation feels awkward.
Enjoy the quiet and only speak when you have something to say.
There is something incredibly loving about being with someone, enjoying each other’s presence, and not saying a single word.
Sex is an intimate act, and a lot of intimacy is unspoken.
Try just making eye contact, smiling or laughing, holding hands, or cuddling.
When the two of you are ready to talk, you’ll feel conversation bubbling up organically. , After a moment as intimate as sex, conversation can seem incredibly mundane and difficult.
Don’t feel like you need to drop a movie-worthy line – you won’t come up with a good one and it won’t sound nearly as romantic as you think.
The most important advice for pillow-talk is to be yourself.
Be relaxed, honest, and open and the conversation will feel natural.
Opening up about your day – share a funny story, talk about work, or explain a new project, hobby, or event that you’re excited for.
Asking questions— you don’t need to start an inquisition; simply ask your partner how their day went, if they have any weekend plans, and let the conversation unfold. , Do not criticize or elaborate at length about the session.
However, letting someone know what you enjoyed briefly and respectfully is a great way to keep a connection going and tell your partner your sexual needs.
Don’t feel like you need to hear anything back either – asking “did you enjoy that,” puts pressure on someone to get the “right” answer and kills the mood.
Keep it brief, as showering someone with praise on their sexual prowess quickly gets weird: “I really liked it when ....” or “That was great when...” should suffice.
Never criticize, rate, or offer tips afterward.
Post-sex is about enjoying each other’s company and feeling relaxed and respectful, not getting a lecture. , Honestly, spending time together after having sex is more important than any conversation you might have.
It is tough to go from an incredibly intimate moment like sex to a conversation about the recycling, so find some lazy, bedside entertainment the two of you can share:
Watch a couple of clips on a laptop.
Share some new music you like.
Do the crossword or puzzles together.
Sit quietly and enjoy a view out the window or just each other’s company. , Without getting graphic, some people like to wash off after lovemaking.
This is perfectly normal, but a good way to prevent your partner from feeling “dirty” is simply to shower together.
This is a great way to avoid laying around in bed afterward but still stay intimate., Sex is a natural, organic extension of a relationship, not the end-all-be-all of life.
So take a deep breath and just enjoy the company of your partner.
The mood will already be relaxed and loving, so go with the flow and be your kind, respectful self. -
Step 3: Keep any conversation candid and casual.
-
Step 4: Tell your partner things that you liked
-
Step 5: but be brief.
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Step 6: Cuddle with a movie
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Step 7: or music if you’re out of things to talk about.
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Step 8: Consider taking a bath or shower together.
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Step 9: Treat each other with respect before
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Step 10: during
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Step 11: and after sex.
Detailed Guide
Just because you’ve enjoyed yourselves doesn’t mean that the feeling of intimacy should end when the sex does.
Put another way – you use foreplay to gradually ramp up the sexual attraction, and you should use the time afterward to gently return to the “real world.” The biggest mistake people make after sex is getting up and leaving as soon as it is over, destroying all of the intimacy you’ve built together.There is no rule saying you have to talk right after sex.
Spooning, cuddling, or even holding hands is a good way to slowly relax back into everyday life.
If you want to put some clothes back on, keep it casual (underwear, sweats, pajamas, etc.) and hop back into bed.
You don’t need to stay naked if it makes you feel uncomfortable.
Turn off the phone—no one wants to feel like their partner would rather talk to someone else.
Stay out of the kitchen – it is natural to feel hungry after sex, but that doesn’t mean your first comment should be “I could use some food.” Stay awake—falling asleep right after sex will make your partner feel disrespected, used, and unloved.
Enjoy the quiet and only speak when you have something to say.
There is something incredibly loving about being with someone, enjoying each other’s presence, and not saying a single word.
Sex is an intimate act, and a lot of intimacy is unspoken.
Try just making eye contact, smiling or laughing, holding hands, or cuddling.
When the two of you are ready to talk, you’ll feel conversation bubbling up organically. , After a moment as intimate as sex, conversation can seem incredibly mundane and difficult.
Don’t feel like you need to drop a movie-worthy line – you won’t come up with a good one and it won’t sound nearly as romantic as you think.
The most important advice for pillow-talk is to be yourself.
Be relaxed, honest, and open and the conversation will feel natural.
Opening up about your day – share a funny story, talk about work, or explain a new project, hobby, or event that you’re excited for.
Asking questions— you don’t need to start an inquisition; simply ask your partner how their day went, if they have any weekend plans, and let the conversation unfold. , Do not criticize or elaborate at length about the session.
However, letting someone know what you enjoyed briefly and respectfully is a great way to keep a connection going and tell your partner your sexual needs.
Don’t feel like you need to hear anything back either – asking “did you enjoy that,” puts pressure on someone to get the “right” answer and kills the mood.
Keep it brief, as showering someone with praise on their sexual prowess quickly gets weird: “I really liked it when ....” or “That was great when...” should suffice.
Never criticize, rate, or offer tips afterward.
Post-sex is about enjoying each other’s company and feeling relaxed and respectful, not getting a lecture. , Honestly, spending time together after having sex is more important than any conversation you might have.
It is tough to go from an incredibly intimate moment like sex to a conversation about the recycling, so find some lazy, bedside entertainment the two of you can share:
Watch a couple of clips on a laptop.
Share some new music you like.
Do the crossword or puzzles together.
Sit quietly and enjoy a view out the window or just each other’s company. , Without getting graphic, some people like to wash off after lovemaking.
This is perfectly normal, but a good way to prevent your partner from feeling “dirty” is simply to shower together.
This is a great way to avoid laying around in bed afterward but still stay intimate., Sex is a natural, organic extension of a relationship, not the end-all-be-all of life.
So take a deep breath and just enjoy the company of your partner.
The mood will already be relaxed and loving, so go with the flow and be your kind, respectful self.
About the Author
Joseph Thomas
Brings years of experience writing about crafts and related subjects.
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