How to Deal With Anxiety and Stress
Recognize the warning signs., Allow yourself to feel anxious at first., Adopt a neutral attitude., Analyze the situation., Resolve the situation., Accept the unresolvable.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Recognize the warning signs.
Sometimes stress and anxiety arrive with bells and whistles, but sometimes they creep up undetected.
Spot the symptoms as they manifest.
Look out for the following warning signs in your behavior, which often come with stress and anxiety.A sharp increase or decrease in appetite.
A growing reliance on alcohol, caffeine, nicotine, or other drugs.
Insomnia or trouble remaining asleep.
Mood swings marked by shorter tempers.
Feeling easily distracted and putting off major decisions.
Feeling engulfed by things that seem to be beyond your control. -
Step 2: Allow yourself to feel anxious at first.
It may seem counter-intuitive, but try to avoid bracing yourself against stress when you feel it building up inside.
Remember that anxiety is an emotion and thus temporary.
Avoid compounding it further by stressing over feeling stressed.
Accept it for what it is and let it wash over you.
As it does, keep yourself calm at the same time by:
Breathing deeply and slowly with full inhales and exhales.
Counting your breaths to focus your attention on the here and now.
Reassessing yourself after ten breaths and repeating if needed. , After allowing yourself to ride out the first wave of anxiety, imagine yourself as a scientist or doctor.
Take a step back from the situation so that it feels less personal or immediate.
Reapproach the situation as if it was a slide under a microscope.
Adopt the clinical detachment of a scientist sorting through data out of professional curiosity, rather than personal concern.Be careful to label this outbreak of anxiety and its sources as a “situation,” rather than immediately framing it as a “problem.” Avoid jumping to conclusions and adopting a negative outlook right from the start. , Identify what triggered your anxiety.
Determine whether the source is something that can be resolved.
Ask yourself:
Whether the situation is a concrete, real-world set of circumstances that can be immediately addressed or merely a hypothetical possibility.
Whether your hypothetical possibility is probable or unlikely to ever actually occur.
Whether the situation can be resolved now and/or prevented from repeating. , Write down every single thing you can possibly do to deal with the circumstances that triggered your anxiety.
Address those aspects of the situation that you are able to directly influence.
From your list, choose the most practical actions that you can make.
Implement your new plan immediately.
For instance, if a bully at school or work triggered your stress:
Forget trying to change the bully’s outlook or personality, since this is most likely beyond your control.
Concentrate instead on steps that you can actually take, such as: minimizing your interaction, confronting them, and/or being the bigger person by refusing to be drawn into petty disputes.
Determine whether the trigger is the present set of circumstances (in this case, the bully’s overall bad attitude), or whether it is because it touches on another source of anxiety (such as appearance, social standing, or past instances of bullying).
If the latter, create a separate list of steps you can take to improve those circumstances as well. , Learn to live with those circumstances that are impossible to change.
Embrace the fact that some things are simply beyond your control.
Allow yourself to feel the negative feelings they cause, without guilt.
Once those initial feelings pass, square yourself to the realities.
Accept them as factors that you will have to contend with in life.Don’t waste time trying to come up with solutions that resolve situations 100% to your liking.
Concentrate on actionable steps you can take to improve your situation, whether it’s by 99% or just 1%.
Learn to laugh at the circumstances and yourself.
Develop a sense of humor regarding your anxieties.
Counteract the negative feelings they cause with positive ones. -
Step 3: Adopt a neutral attitude.
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Step 4: Analyze the situation.
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Step 5: Resolve the situation.
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Step 6: Accept the unresolvable.
Detailed Guide
Sometimes stress and anxiety arrive with bells and whistles, but sometimes they creep up undetected.
Spot the symptoms as they manifest.
Look out for the following warning signs in your behavior, which often come with stress and anxiety.A sharp increase or decrease in appetite.
A growing reliance on alcohol, caffeine, nicotine, or other drugs.
Insomnia or trouble remaining asleep.
Mood swings marked by shorter tempers.
Feeling easily distracted and putting off major decisions.
Feeling engulfed by things that seem to be beyond your control.
It may seem counter-intuitive, but try to avoid bracing yourself against stress when you feel it building up inside.
Remember that anxiety is an emotion and thus temporary.
Avoid compounding it further by stressing over feeling stressed.
Accept it for what it is and let it wash over you.
As it does, keep yourself calm at the same time by:
Breathing deeply and slowly with full inhales and exhales.
Counting your breaths to focus your attention on the here and now.
Reassessing yourself after ten breaths and repeating if needed. , After allowing yourself to ride out the first wave of anxiety, imagine yourself as a scientist or doctor.
Take a step back from the situation so that it feels less personal or immediate.
Reapproach the situation as if it was a slide under a microscope.
Adopt the clinical detachment of a scientist sorting through data out of professional curiosity, rather than personal concern.Be careful to label this outbreak of anxiety and its sources as a “situation,” rather than immediately framing it as a “problem.” Avoid jumping to conclusions and adopting a negative outlook right from the start. , Identify what triggered your anxiety.
Determine whether the source is something that can be resolved.
Ask yourself:
Whether the situation is a concrete, real-world set of circumstances that can be immediately addressed or merely a hypothetical possibility.
Whether your hypothetical possibility is probable or unlikely to ever actually occur.
Whether the situation can be resolved now and/or prevented from repeating. , Write down every single thing you can possibly do to deal with the circumstances that triggered your anxiety.
Address those aspects of the situation that you are able to directly influence.
From your list, choose the most practical actions that you can make.
Implement your new plan immediately.
For instance, if a bully at school or work triggered your stress:
Forget trying to change the bully’s outlook or personality, since this is most likely beyond your control.
Concentrate instead on steps that you can actually take, such as: minimizing your interaction, confronting them, and/or being the bigger person by refusing to be drawn into petty disputes.
Determine whether the trigger is the present set of circumstances (in this case, the bully’s overall bad attitude), or whether it is because it touches on another source of anxiety (such as appearance, social standing, or past instances of bullying).
If the latter, create a separate list of steps you can take to improve those circumstances as well. , Learn to live with those circumstances that are impossible to change.
Embrace the fact that some things are simply beyond your control.
Allow yourself to feel the negative feelings they cause, without guilt.
Once those initial feelings pass, square yourself to the realities.
Accept them as factors that you will have to contend with in life.Don’t waste time trying to come up with solutions that resolve situations 100% to your liking.
Concentrate on actionable steps you can take to improve your situation, whether it’s by 99% or just 1%.
Learn to laugh at the circumstances and yourself.
Develop a sense of humor regarding your anxieties.
Counteract the negative feelings they cause with positive ones.
About the Author
Angela James
Committed to making lifestyle accessible and understandable for everyone.
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