How to Fake a Fever
Wake up early., Warm up the thermometer to "fake" the stats., In the event your parents are watching you take your temperature, be clever.
Step-by-Step Guide
-
Step 1: Wake up early.
The key to faking out your parents is to let them wake you up
-— with your fever already flaring! To do this, you have to prepare ahead.
If you think your parents are just going to touch your forehead, try the following:
First things first, tell them you feel cold
-- not hot.
Just because you have a fever does not mean you're aware that you're actually "burning up." Before your parents come wake you, wake up early and put your whole body (including your head) under a thick blanket to increase body temperature.
Get a water bottle or glass full of hot water.
If your parents knock or call in to you, you'll know when they're coming and will be able to drink it.
This should raise your temperature by a few degrees, and make you look flushed and warm.
Get creative with electronics.
Is there a hot laptop or light bulb you could use to warm your face if you don't have hot water. -
Step 2: Warm up the thermometer to "fake" the stats.
Heat an electric thermometer with your hand.
Hold the thermometer as still as you can with one hand, and rub your thumb as fast as you can until your desired fever is reached.
Keep it to 99º or so
-- too high and you'll be rushed to the hospital.
Also, you can heat a sock in the microwave for about a minute, put it under your armpit and measure your temperature.
You can even do this in front of your parents, just make sure you have large clothing so the sock will not be visible.
If your thermometer has an infant/toddler setting, switch to it.
Your temperature will go up 1 or 2 degrees.
Heat a mercury thermometer with water.
Go to a sink (preferably one near the water heater so it'll take less time) and turn on the hot water
-- as hot as it will go.
Put the tip of the mercury thermometer under the running hot water until your desired temperature is reached/passed.
If you pass it, shake the thermometer down until it falls back to your desired temperature.
If mom catches you in the bathroom, tell her it seems to be moving to your stomach.
Shake your mercury thermometer by holding it from it's tip.
But be careful, though, because if you are too violent, it will reach an impossibly high temperature and your parents could either not believe you or send you to the nearest hospital.
Be careful not to shake so hard or you will shatter the glass.
Use a light bulb.
Heat a mercury thermometer on a light bulb for a few minutes before placing it in your mouth.
Or whenever your parents walk out of the room, of course! , You have to pretend you're going to be sick, and run to the bathroom.
Thank God! False alarm.
But you should probably stay in the bathroom for a few minutes to make sure.
Do you need anything? No.
Just privacy for a while.
Lock the door! Turn on the hot water in the sink.
Make horrible retching noises, dump a glass of water (or two...or three) in the toilet bowl.
Don't forget to flush! Drink some hot water before you go back to your bedroom.
Dab a little on your face, too, so it feels sweaty and you look a little worse for the wear.
By now, mom probably forgot about your temperature! Ask her if she could call into school before she gets around to remembering.
Or to call into school while you take your temperature. -
Step 3: In the event your parents are watching you take your temperature
-
Step 4: be clever.
Detailed Guide
The key to faking out your parents is to let them wake you up
-— with your fever already flaring! To do this, you have to prepare ahead.
If you think your parents are just going to touch your forehead, try the following:
First things first, tell them you feel cold
-- not hot.
Just because you have a fever does not mean you're aware that you're actually "burning up." Before your parents come wake you, wake up early and put your whole body (including your head) under a thick blanket to increase body temperature.
Get a water bottle or glass full of hot water.
If your parents knock or call in to you, you'll know when they're coming and will be able to drink it.
This should raise your temperature by a few degrees, and make you look flushed and warm.
Get creative with electronics.
Is there a hot laptop or light bulb you could use to warm your face if you don't have hot water.
Heat an electric thermometer with your hand.
Hold the thermometer as still as you can with one hand, and rub your thumb as fast as you can until your desired fever is reached.
Keep it to 99º or so
-- too high and you'll be rushed to the hospital.
Also, you can heat a sock in the microwave for about a minute, put it under your armpit and measure your temperature.
You can even do this in front of your parents, just make sure you have large clothing so the sock will not be visible.
If your thermometer has an infant/toddler setting, switch to it.
Your temperature will go up 1 or 2 degrees.
Heat a mercury thermometer with water.
Go to a sink (preferably one near the water heater so it'll take less time) and turn on the hot water
-- as hot as it will go.
Put the tip of the mercury thermometer under the running hot water until your desired temperature is reached/passed.
If you pass it, shake the thermometer down until it falls back to your desired temperature.
If mom catches you in the bathroom, tell her it seems to be moving to your stomach.
Shake your mercury thermometer by holding it from it's tip.
But be careful, though, because if you are too violent, it will reach an impossibly high temperature and your parents could either not believe you or send you to the nearest hospital.
Be careful not to shake so hard or you will shatter the glass.
Use a light bulb.
Heat a mercury thermometer on a light bulb for a few minutes before placing it in your mouth.
Or whenever your parents walk out of the room, of course! , You have to pretend you're going to be sick, and run to the bathroom.
Thank God! False alarm.
But you should probably stay in the bathroom for a few minutes to make sure.
Do you need anything? No.
Just privacy for a while.
Lock the door! Turn on the hot water in the sink.
Make horrible retching noises, dump a glass of water (or two...or three) in the toilet bowl.
Don't forget to flush! Drink some hot water before you go back to your bedroom.
Dab a little on your face, too, so it feels sweaty and you look a little worse for the wear.
By now, mom probably forgot about your temperature! Ask her if she could call into school before she gets around to remembering.
Or to call into school while you take your temperature.
About the Author
Sharon Scott
Sharon Scott specializes in lifestyle and practical guides and has been creating helpful content for over 3 years. Sharon is committed to helping readers learn new skills and improve their lives.
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