How to Get Over the Past
Face your feelings., Identify the source., Own the past.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Face your feelings.
Ruminating on the past can bring up a whole host of negative emotions, and it's important to name the things that you feel.
Find ways to get in touch with your emotional angst.
Try writing about your feelings or quietly meditating on the past.
Consider speaking with a trusted friend or counselor.
Perhaps you feel guilty about something that you did, or you regret something that you didn't do.
You wish that you had acted differently, and you cannot stop blaming yourself.
Perhaps you feel sad about something that happened beyond your control.
You feel melancholy, wistful, powerless. -
Step 2: Identify the source.
If you're having trouble getting over the past, there's a good chance that you are fixating on something that happened.
Decide whether you need to get over a tragic event, an unhealthy relationship, a negative habit, or a more complex pattern.
Try to understand what is making you feel the way that you feel.
You may remember this thing clearly, but it might also be murky and tangled in your head.
Clarify the past for yourself. , This is your history, and there is no escaping it.
Do not try to cover up the past, and do not try to run away from it.
What has happened has happened, and you cannot change it.
Granted, this is easier said than done.
However, it is only once you face the past that you can truly grapple with it and overcome it.
Consider the freedom that comes with this reality.
If you cannot change the past, is there any sense in worrying about it? Can you turn your attention to the present and the future? -
Step 3: Own the past.
Detailed Guide
Ruminating on the past can bring up a whole host of negative emotions, and it's important to name the things that you feel.
Find ways to get in touch with your emotional angst.
Try writing about your feelings or quietly meditating on the past.
Consider speaking with a trusted friend or counselor.
Perhaps you feel guilty about something that you did, or you regret something that you didn't do.
You wish that you had acted differently, and you cannot stop blaming yourself.
Perhaps you feel sad about something that happened beyond your control.
You feel melancholy, wistful, powerless.
If you're having trouble getting over the past, there's a good chance that you are fixating on something that happened.
Decide whether you need to get over a tragic event, an unhealthy relationship, a negative habit, or a more complex pattern.
Try to understand what is making you feel the way that you feel.
You may remember this thing clearly, but it might also be murky and tangled in your head.
Clarify the past for yourself. , This is your history, and there is no escaping it.
Do not try to cover up the past, and do not try to run away from it.
What has happened has happened, and you cannot change it.
Granted, this is easier said than done.
However, it is only once you face the past that you can truly grapple with it and overcome it.
Consider the freedom that comes with this reality.
If you cannot change the past, is there any sense in worrying about it? Can you turn your attention to the present and the future?
About the Author
Susan Flores
Enthusiastic about teaching organization techniques through clear, step-by-step guides.
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