How to Give a Guy Space
Determine what space means., Develop a plan together., Don’t always initiate contact., Call a friend when you want to call him., Delete his number., Take a social media break., Practice positive self-talk., Find enjoyable activities.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Determine what space means.
Once you have been asked to provide more space in the relationship, find out what that will mean for the two of you.
Perhaps he is just looking to have a bit more alone time on the regular but doesn’t want to cut off communication.
Or maybe he is feeling a bit trapped and wants to figure out if this relationship is working for him.
Whatever the cause, make sure to clarify the reason as well as next steps.Keep in mind that “space” can mean many things.
It’s also healthy to have a personal life outside of your relationship.
If a guy asks for space, it may suggest you need to find personal hobbies and interests apart from the relationship. -
Step 2: Develop a plan together.
Your partner might need a break from you completely, and if he does, resist the urge to freak out.
Instead, after asking why, develop a plan.
You two will need to figure out how long of a break he needs as well as any boundaries that should exist during this time.
For instance, perhaps he is asking for a two-week break to sort through some things, during which time he agrees to not initiate romantic contact with anyone else.Determine what you are comfortable with.
If you cannot handle two full weeks, then tell him this.
If you would like the opportunity to see other people, tell him this as well, but be prepared for him to potentially be upset or angry. , If you are accustomed to talking to him all day nonstop, it can be difficult to go cold turkey with communication.
However, it is necessary that you do not always reach out to him first while he needs space except for in emergencies.
He is asking for space for a reason and you should honor his request.
Feel free to answer his calls and texts, but don’t always be the first to initiate.
For instance, if he asks for a bit more alone time in the relationship, and you notice that you are the only one who ever calls or texts first, refrain from doing so.
Try to establish a more equitable partnership. , Though you may feel the urge to reach out constantly, you can put a plan in place to avoid this.
During the time that he needs space, you don’t want to become needy or else you will push him farther away from you.
When you feel that you want to call him, call a friend instead.
Your need to be social might be more important than your need to talk to him specifically.
Create a list of friends that you can call so that if one doesn’t answer, you have a few backups.
You might also talk with a family member or other loved one. , If you feel that reaching out to friends is not enough, then delete his number.
This will prevent you from calling or texting him, especially if you don’t know his number by heart.
When he reaches back out to you, you can save his number in your phone again. , Seeing your guy on social media might intensify your urge to talk to him, but stay strong.
Deactivate your pages for a few days or unfollow him or his posts.
You don’t need to go as far as to unfriend him during this time, but you can prevent yourself from seeing the things he posts.Consider unfollowing his friends, as well. , In addition to switching up how you communicate with him, you should also alter how you communicate with yourself.
Perhaps you have been down in the dumps since he asked for space and you aren’t feeling so positive lately.
When you begin to feel down, repeat positive, affirming, or productive statements to yourself to override your negativity.You might repeat things to yourself like “I am strong,” “It will be okay,” or “I will not reach out to him today.” , Try to do things you enjoy and find fun.
This might be taking up an activity or exercising.
It also might mean catching up with friends for coffee and conversation.
This will not only make you feel better in general, but also take your mind off the situation.
Why not try an organized activity like an exercise class or yoga? Hobbies like biking or hiking could be helpful, too. -
Step 3: Don’t always initiate contact.
-
Step 4: Call a friend when you want to call him.
-
Step 5: Delete his number.
-
Step 6: Take a social media break.
-
Step 7: Practice positive self-talk.
-
Step 8: Find enjoyable activities.
Detailed Guide
Once you have been asked to provide more space in the relationship, find out what that will mean for the two of you.
Perhaps he is just looking to have a bit more alone time on the regular but doesn’t want to cut off communication.
Or maybe he is feeling a bit trapped and wants to figure out if this relationship is working for him.
Whatever the cause, make sure to clarify the reason as well as next steps.Keep in mind that “space” can mean many things.
It’s also healthy to have a personal life outside of your relationship.
If a guy asks for space, it may suggest you need to find personal hobbies and interests apart from the relationship.
Your partner might need a break from you completely, and if he does, resist the urge to freak out.
Instead, after asking why, develop a plan.
You two will need to figure out how long of a break he needs as well as any boundaries that should exist during this time.
For instance, perhaps he is asking for a two-week break to sort through some things, during which time he agrees to not initiate romantic contact with anyone else.Determine what you are comfortable with.
If you cannot handle two full weeks, then tell him this.
If you would like the opportunity to see other people, tell him this as well, but be prepared for him to potentially be upset or angry. , If you are accustomed to talking to him all day nonstop, it can be difficult to go cold turkey with communication.
However, it is necessary that you do not always reach out to him first while he needs space except for in emergencies.
He is asking for space for a reason and you should honor his request.
Feel free to answer his calls and texts, but don’t always be the first to initiate.
For instance, if he asks for a bit more alone time in the relationship, and you notice that you are the only one who ever calls or texts first, refrain from doing so.
Try to establish a more equitable partnership. , Though you may feel the urge to reach out constantly, you can put a plan in place to avoid this.
During the time that he needs space, you don’t want to become needy or else you will push him farther away from you.
When you feel that you want to call him, call a friend instead.
Your need to be social might be more important than your need to talk to him specifically.
Create a list of friends that you can call so that if one doesn’t answer, you have a few backups.
You might also talk with a family member or other loved one. , If you feel that reaching out to friends is not enough, then delete his number.
This will prevent you from calling or texting him, especially if you don’t know his number by heart.
When he reaches back out to you, you can save his number in your phone again. , Seeing your guy on social media might intensify your urge to talk to him, but stay strong.
Deactivate your pages for a few days or unfollow him or his posts.
You don’t need to go as far as to unfriend him during this time, but you can prevent yourself from seeing the things he posts.Consider unfollowing his friends, as well. , In addition to switching up how you communicate with him, you should also alter how you communicate with yourself.
Perhaps you have been down in the dumps since he asked for space and you aren’t feeling so positive lately.
When you begin to feel down, repeat positive, affirming, or productive statements to yourself to override your negativity.You might repeat things to yourself like “I am strong,” “It will be okay,” or “I will not reach out to him today.” , Try to do things you enjoy and find fun.
This might be taking up an activity or exercising.
It also might mean catching up with friends for coffee and conversation.
This will not only make you feel better in general, but also take your mind off the situation.
Why not try an organized activity like an exercise class or yoga? Hobbies like biking or hiking could be helpful, too.
About the Author
Jason Howard
Jason Howard specializes in education and learning and has been creating helpful content for over 12 years. Jason is committed to helping readers learn new skills and improve their lives.
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