How to Have a Zen Attitude
Let go of what you can’t control., Look at the bigger picture., Control or change the aspects that you can control., Focus on what’s going right., Visualize a positive outcome., Appreciate the journey.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Let go of what you can’t control.
You are the only entity that you can fully control.
Your thoughts, actions and feelings are what you are able to change.
The actions and thoughts of anyone else, on the other hand, are precisely what you cannot control, perhaps despite your best efforts.
Learn to let go of what other people think and do, and turn your focus back onto yourself.Give people the benefit of the doubt.
If you think you’ve been wronged or mistreated, evaluate the situation from a third-person point of view.
Consider that the offending person might not be aware of what they’ve done.
Give them the benefit of the doubt and consider they are just unaware.Alternately, if someone has disappointed you, think about your expectations.
Are they realistic? Were your expectations communicated to the other person? It might help to talk to that person, for example, to clarify how the miscommunication happened. -
Step 2: Look at the bigger picture.
Putting things into perspective will help you balance the way you approach life.
This goes hand in hand with letting go of things you can’t control.
Ask yourself what else is happening in the world that might be contributing to a negative situation.When thinking about an issue that you can't control, make a list of factors out of your control that impact this issue.
For example, if you are having trouble finding a job, think about the downturned economy or the outsourcing of jobs in your industry.
Reduce worry by asking yourself if something will matter in an hour or a day from now., When you empower yourself to take control of certain things, you can feel more adept at maintaining a calm attitude.
For example, if you get riled up at the morning traffic, consider controlling your interactions with the traffic by changing the time that you leave in the morning, or taking mass transit.Don’t give your mind more fodder for stress, anger and frustration.
Instead, reduce these things so you can clear your mind. , Remind yourself about what is positive about your life and what is happening that helps you move forward.
Make a list of things that are going well for you.
Review this list periodically or post it on your fridge as a reminder. , While you may not be able to control exactly how things will turn out, you can give yourself a sense of what the most positive scenario will look like.
This will also stave off negative thoughts by refocusing your mind on positivity.
Use a picture to help you visualize what you want.
If you need a new or better car, take a picture of your ideal car at a dealership.
Tape it to your fridge or bathroom mirror so you can see it every day.
Use affirmations to help you visualize your positive outcome.
These statements will help you envision achieving what you want to achieve.
You might say, "I am running my own successful business and I have lots of happy clients." Repeat this message to yourself throughout the day to maintain focus and positivity on achieving your positive outcome., When you don’t achieve a certain result, it can be discouraging or frustrating.
Look for the silver lining in this event.
If you’ve been laid off from your job, for example, you might be frustrated and angry.
But consider how this may open other opportunities for you, or how it might give you more time to be with family during an important time.Try to appreciate and revel in the spontaneity and uncertainty.
It can be unnerving, but if you are open to all possibilities, you can start to see where positive developments can happen.Keep a gratitude journal.
Write down a few things every day that you can appreciate about your surroundings or your present life situation.
Look over your writing at the end of every week to see how much you have to be grateful for. -
Step 3: Control or change the aspects that you can control.
-
Step 4: Focus on what’s going right.
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Step 5: Visualize a positive outcome.
-
Step 6: Appreciate the journey.
Detailed Guide
You are the only entity that you can fully control.
Your thoughts, actions and feelings are what you are able to change.
The actions and thoughts of anyone else, on the other hand, are precisely what you cannot control, perhaps despite your best efforts.
Learn to let go of what other people think and do, and turn your focus back onto yourself.Give people the benefit of the doubt.
If you think you’ve been wronged or mistreated, evaluate the situation from a third-person point of view.
Consider that the offending person might not be aware of what they’ve done.
Give them the benefit of the doubt and consider they are just unaware.Alternately, if someone has disappointed you, think about your expectations.
Are they realistic? Were your expectations communicated to the other person? It might help to talk to that person, for example, to clarify how the miscommunication happened.
Putting things into perspective will help you balance the way you approach life.
This goes hand in hand with letting go of things you can’t control.
Ask yourself what else is happening in the world that might be contributing to a negative situation.When thinking about an issue that you can't control, make a list of factors out of your control that impact this issue.
For example, if you are having trouble finding a job, think about the downturned economy or the outsourcing of jobs in your industry.
Reduce worry by asking yourself if something will matter in an hour or a day from now., When you empower yourself to take control of certain things, you can feel more adept at maintaining a calm attitude.
For example, if you get riled up at the morning traffic, consider controlling your interactions with the traffic by changing the time that you leave in the morning, or taking mass transit.Don’t give your mind more fodder for stress, anger and frustration.
Instead, reduce these things so you can clear your mind. , Remind yourself about what is positive about your life and what is happening that helps you move forward.
Make a list of things that are going well for you.
Review this list periodically or post it on your fridge as a reminder. , While you may not be able to control exactly how things will turn out, you can give yourself a sense of what the most positive scenario will look like.
This will also stave off negative thoughts by refocusing your mind on positivity.
Use a picture to help you visualize what you want.
If you need a new or better car, take a picture of your ideal car at a dealership.
Tape it to your fridge or bathroom mirror so you can see it every day.
Use affirmations to help you visualize your positive outcome.
These statements will help you envision achieving what you want to achieve.
You might say, "I am running my own successful business and I have lots of happy clients." Repeat this message to yourself throughout the day to maintain focus and positivity on achieving your positive outcome., When you don’t achieve a certain result, it can be discouraging or frustrating.
Look for the silver lining in this event.
If you’ve been laid off from your job, for example, you might be frustrated and angry.
But consider how this may open other opportunities for you, or how it might give you more time to be with family during an important time.Try to appreciate and revel in the spontaneity and uncertainty.
It can be unnerving, but if you are open to all possibilities, you can start to see where positive developments can happen.Keep a gratitude journal.
Write down a few things every day that you can appreciate about your surroundings or your present life situation.
Look over your writing at the end of every week to see how much you have to be grateful for.
About the Author
Charlotte Harvey
Experienced content creator specializing in hobbies guides and tutorials.
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