How to Know if You're Addicted to Praise
Decide whether or not you get jealous of other’s achievements., Determine whether or not you compare yourself to others., Think about whether or not you only do things to make others happy., Figure out whether or not your self-worth comes from...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Decide whether or not you get jealous of other’s achievements.
One way to figure out if you are addicted to praise is to see if other people’s achievements cause you to become jealous.
This can be jealousy when other people get recognized for something they did, or when someone gets praised for something similar to things you do.Be honest with yourself about your jealousy.
Do you get upset, angry, or sad when someone else gets praise? For example, you might feel jealous or upset that someone in your company got a promotion, even if you were not passed over for the same position, because the person received the elevation in status instead of you.
You may also feel angry that someone's project at work got an award or special recognition from a superior. -
Step 2: Determine whether or not you compare yourself to others.
If you are addicted to praise, you may compare yourself to others.
This may happen if someone else gets acknowledged for something.
After the person gets acknowledged, you may view anything that person in light of what you do.Do you compare your success to someone else’s? Think about how you feel when someone else is successful for something you also excel at.
Do you compare the praise someone else gets to the praise you get? Keep note of how often you view the praise you get in relation to that received by others.
You may focus on the wording, trying to decide if there are real ways to distinguish if your praise is better than the other person's praise.
If you run a blog, you might compare statistics of your blog with someone else's.
You will feel good if they are better, but feel lousy if they are worse. , People who seek praise may refrain from doing things they want.
Instead, they may only do things to please others and get praise.Do you only do things to please those around you? This might be dressing how others like, writing songs, music, or stories that others want to see, or ignoring your own ideas in favor of ideas that you know others might like instead.
For example, although you want to make Mexican food, you may make Italian instead because you know you will be praised for the lasagna more than the tacos.
At work, despite wanting to do a campaign about sexism, you instead go with a light-hearted campaign to please the people around you. , If you are addicted to praise, you may find yourself unhappy with what you have done until someone tells you it is good.
You go seeking others’ approval to feel successful and good about yourself.Look at your behavior.
When you finish a project, an activity, or even a meal, do you feel accomplished? Are you happy with the results? Do you need someone to tell you that you did a good job before you can feel happy about what you have done? For example, you may always ask people what they think of what you have done before you make up your own mind about what you have done.
You ask your boss or your coworker what they think about your project before you determine it is good.
If they don't like it, you don't like it.
If you write a story, you send it to your writing group before you decide if it's good.
If they like it, you like it, too. , Sometimes, people who are addicted to praise are extremely competitive.
This stems from needing to receive the praise over someone else.Do you feel the constant need to be better than someone else? Do you try to be the best so you can get the praise? Do you dislike sharing responsibility or achievements with people? Do you hate sharing praise with others? For example, you may always need to be the best at something.
This means your goal is always to have the best project, make the best meal, or play the best piece of music so you get the most praise. -
Step 3: Think about whether or not you only do things to make others happy.
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Step 4: Figure out whether or not your self-worth comes from others.
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Step 5: Determine whether or not you are a competitive person.
Detailed Guide
One way to figure out if you are addicted to praise is to see if other people’s achievements cause you to become jealous.
This can be jealousy when other people get recognized for something they did, or when someone gets praised for something similar to things you do.Be honest with yourself about your jealousy.
Do you get upset, angry, or sad when someone else gets praise? For example, you might feel jealous or upset that someone in your company got a promotion, even if you were not passed over for the same position, because the person received the elevation in status instead of you.
You may also feel angry that someone's project at work got an award or special recognition from a superior.
If you are addicted to praise, you may compare yourself to others.
This may happen if someone else gets acknowledged for something.
After the person gets acknowledged, you may view anything that person in light of what you do.Do you compare your success to someone else’s? Think about how you feel when someone else is successful for something you also excel at.
Do you compare the praise someone else gets to the praise you get? Keep note of how often you view the praise you get in relation to that received by others.
You may focus on the wording, trying to decide if there are real ways to distinguish if your praise is better than the other person's praise.
If you run a blog, you might compare statistics of your blog with someone else's.
You will feel good if they are better, but feel lousy if they are worse. , People who seek praise may refrain from doing things they want.
Instead, they may only do things to please others and get praise.Do you only do things to please those around you? This might be dressing how others like, writing songs, music, or stories that others want to see, or ignoring your own ideas in favor of ideas that you know others might like instead.
For example, although you want to make Mexican food, you may make Italian instead because you know you will be praised for the lasagna more than the tacos.
At work, despite wanting to do a campaign about sexism, you instead go with a light-hearted campaign to please the people around you. , If you are addicted to praise, you may find yourself unhappy with what you have done until someone tells you it is good.
You go seeking others’ approval to feel successful and good about yourself.Look at your behavior.
When you finish a project, an activity, or even a meal, do you feel accomplished? Are you happy with the results? Do you need someone to tell you that you did a good job before you can feel happy about what you have done? For example, you may always ask people what they think of what you have done before you make up your own mind about what you have done.
You ask your boss or your coworker what they think about your project before you determine it is good.
If they don't like it, you don't like it.
If you write a story, you send it to your writing group before you decide if it's good.
If they like it, you like it, too. , Sometimes, people who are addicted to praise are extremely competitive.
This stems from needing to receive the praise over someone else.Do you feel the constant need to be better than someone else? Do you try to be the best so you can get the praise? Do you dislike sharing responsibility or achievements with people? Do you hate sharing praise with others? For example, you may always need to be the best at something.
This means your goal is always to have the best project, make the best meal, or play the best piece of music so you get the most praise.
About the Author
Jacqueline Sullivan
Professional writer focused on creating easy-to-follow creative arts tutorials.
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