How to Let a Guy Know You're Interested
Talk to him., Discuss your own life., Ask him about his life., Laugh at his jokes., Tease carefully., Flatter him., Tell him you want to talk to him again., Make and break eye contact., Smile., Brush against him., Cross your arms with...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Talk to him.
This might seem like an obvious point, but that doesn't make it any less worth mentioning.
If you spend the entire night avoiding the guy you're interested in because you find yourself in a panic about what to say and how to act, he will probably interpret your avoidance as disinterest, instead. -
Step 2: Discuss your own life.
Once the conversation has been going on for a little while, start talking about yourself.
Your interests, friends, work, and family are all fair game, but you should probably avoid talking about ex-boyfriends or failed relationships right away.
If your conversations stay centered on “safe” topics like the weather or the party, you are keeping your guard up, and this can make a guy think that you do not feel open to his advances.
By letting him know a little about you, you can let him know that you are interested in him enough to invite him into your personal space and into your life. , While talking about yourself is important, asking the guy about himself is just as essential.
This gesture tells the guy that you are interested in learning more about him, which translates into you being interested in the guy himself.
You also need to reply as he is talking about his life to show that you really are paying attention and really are interested in knowing what he's all about. , Forced laughter is never advised, but if you find something even mildly humorous, you should let him know you appreciate his humor with a laugh.
Even a quiet giggle can speak volumes about your interest in the guy.
Forced laughter is usually pretty obvious, and forcing a laugh will make it seem as though you pity the poor guy rather than appreciate him.
Moreover, if you have to force yourself to laugh at his jokes, you should be asking yourself if you are really as interested in this guy as you first thought. , A little playful banter can be effective, but avoid stepping all over the poor guy's ego.
In contemporary terms, a little sarcasm or dry wit can be very attractive, but it must be accompanied by body language that communicates your interest in order to let the guy know that you are being playful rather than critical.
Teasing should be playful in nature.
For example, if his tie is crooked and he hurriedly tries to straighten it, you could laugh and tease that crooked ties are all the rage right now.
If your teasing remark gets him joking back or at least gets a smile, you did it right.
On the other hand, any teasing you do should not be overly critical and should not cut him down.
For instance, if he is nervous around you and accidentally spills his drink on your dress, you should not tease about him ruining a favorite dress or a family heirloom since this will only make him feel worse about his mistake. , Everyone can appreciate a good compliment, as long as it seems genuine.
Complimenting a guy's appearance is the easiest, most straight-forward way of letting a guy know you're interested.
You could also throw out a compliment or two about the guy's personality, though, especially after you've been talking to him for a little while.
Compliments on his appearance can be about him or his clothes.
For example, you could say, “Your eyes are amazingly expressive,” but you could also say, “Your shirt is great.
That color blue really brings out your eyes.” , Really, the easiest way to end a conversation in a way that let's your guy know that you want to see him again is to come straight out and say something along the lines of, "I had a wonderful time talking with you tonight.
I really hope we can do it again sometime."Working in some nonverbal cues can also drive the point home.
Try saying this line while lightly touching his arm.
With any luck, your guy will ask for your phone number at this point.
If you can tell that he is clearly interested in you but too smitten to ask, you could always ask him for his number or offer yours. , Eyes are “windows to the soul,” so eye contact is a vital element of letting a guy know that you're interested.
That said, you do not want to stare the guy down straight-on.
A better move would be to make eye contact, drop your eyes to the floor, then slowly sweep them back up to meet his again.Supposedly, by looking down after initial eye contact and dragging your eyes back up slowly, you are sending a signal that you feel attracted to the guy you saw and are processing your internal emotions about it.
By returning eye contact after the pause, you tell the guy that, after processing your emotions, the prognosis is good for him.
Staring the guy straight on often suggests that you are not affected by him at all. , Just about everyone appreciates a friendly smile, even when flirtation and romance are not the order of the day.
Smiling implies friendliness and openness, and before you can let a guy know that you are interested in him romantically, you need to use this simple gesture to make yourself seem inviting enough to be around.
That said, you should only smile if it feels natural.
If you feel nervous or otherwise don't feel like smiling, and smiling you do can come across as being forced and awkward.
That will only turn the guy in question away. , Never underestimate the power of physical contact.
Brushing your hand against his arm during conversation is a fantastic way to bridge the distance between the two of you and suggest that you desire some sort of physical intimacy with the guy you're brushing against.
Be aware of the fact that some forms of touch are more suggestive than others.
For example, touching a guy's arm is playful and flirtatious, but fairly safe.
Placing your hand on a guy's thigh, however, is like implying that you want into his bed, and soon. , If you cross your arms and keep the rest of your body equally closed off, you will send a clear signal that you want the guy to go away.
If the rest of your body language is open, though, crossing your arms could actually send a good message to the guy in question.
When done the right way, it can be a subtle way of drawing attention to your chest and acknowledging a primal sort of attraction.
In order to do it well, you should keep one hand free and expressive while the other one lightly casually the opposite arm in a fold. , By moving in closer, you convey the message that you want to be closer to the guy you move in toward.
If you lean back or move away, you would essentially be saying that you want to put more distance between you and the person you're conversing with.
Lean in naturally and gracefully.
The best time to do this is when you are already in conversation with they guy.
Leaning in suggests that you are hanging on his every word, which is a clear sign of interest. , Crossing and uncrossing your legs can convey a sense of nervousness, which can let the guy in question know that he is really getting under your skin.
Do this occasionally to convey your attraction to the guy, but avoid overdoing it, otherwise he may perceive that he makes you uncomfortable in a bad way or feel as though he has too much power over you.
You can also use leg crossing as a way to express bold, direct interest.
If the rest of your body language is confident and you cross your legs to show them off, it can be interpreted as a seductive action.
If you intentionally point your top leg toward him, that can be interpreted as an even clearer sign of attraction. , Twirling the ends of your hair in between your fingers can also convey nervousness and let a guy know that he is getting under your skin and into your thoughts.
As with arm crossing and leg crossing, though, there are limits.
Playing with your hair can express boredom if you do not keep the rest of your body language open.
Tossing your hair over your shoulder can also be a sexy gesture.
Long hair is a feminine quality, and drawing attention to your hair draws attention to your femininity.
Doing this suggests to a guy that you really, really want him to notice your womanly charms. , Licking your lips is a dead giveaway that you are interested in a guy.
When you feel attraction, your mouth and lips start to dry out, and you impulsively lick your lips as a way of moisturizing them.
Licking your lips also suggests that you are, subconsciously or consciously, thinking about kissing the guy. , Splitting your attention between multiple guys and flirting with multiple guys may give the impression that you have a naturally flirtatious personality, thereby making your interest in the guy less apparent. , If you meet a guy when you're already out and about, it might be too late to change your wardrobe, but if plan your outfit ahead of time whenever you can.
Wear clothes that flatter your figure and show off your best attributes.
Note, however, that this does not mean you should dress provocatively.
Wearing tight clothes that bare your cleavage, legs, back, and midriff can seem desperate, which might make a guy think that you are of the mindset that any guy will do as long as you can get whatever you crave from him.
Focus on one area of your body to emphasize.
If a shirt really plays up your cleavage, avoid matching it with a skirt that really shows off your legs. , In each scenario, a guy you do not know may find it difficult to approach you.
You do not necessarily need to be completely alone, but definitely opt for small groups over large groups.
If you are in a large group of girls, a guy might hesitate to approach you if he does not want to entertain a whole group and only wants to pay attention to you.
Any group that includes guys sends off the message that you might not be available, and a guy might completely miss the signs you're throwing at him one he gets this in his mind. , When you decide to take a break from the activities going on around you, stand or sit in a fairly quiet area.
A guy will be more likely to approach you there than he would be if he thinks he will need to shout above the noise for you to hear him.
Outdoor areas tend to be preferable to indoor areas, since it is easier to break away to a quiet location outside than it is in a packed, noisy room. , Never leave the scene too early.
You might think you've been laying on a full night's worth of signals in 30 minutes, but some guys can be shy about approaching women they do not know.
If you think the guy in question might be interested in you, as well, make sure he has plenty of time to approach you before you give up.
If you're at a bar, party, or reception, keep in mind that the guy you have your eye on might feel like he needs a few glasses of “liquid courage” before he can approach the pretty woman making eyes at him.
Give him a chance to work up the nerve. , If all else fails, it is perfectly acceptable for you to approach a guy you are interested in.
It can even be a good move if the guy has been dropping hints that he is interested but too shy to make the first move.
By making the first move, you create the impression that you are a confident person, and confidence is a highly appealing quality.
Making the first move is also a clear declaration of your interest in him. -
Step 3: Ask him about his life.
-
Step 4: Laugh at his jokes.
-
Step 5: Tease carefully.
-
Step 6: Flatter him.
-
Step 7: Tell him you want to talk to him again.
-
Step 8: Make and break eye contact.
-
Step 9: Smile.
-
Step 10: Brush against him.
-
Step 11: Cross your arms with caution.Crossing your arms can communicate interest or disinterest depending on how you do it.
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Step 12: Lean in.
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Step 13: Cross and uncross your legs.
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Step 14: Play with your hair.
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Step 15: Lick your lips.
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Step 16: Flirt with him and him alone.If you are trying to let one guy know that you're interested in him
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Step 17: all of your attention should be focused on that one guy.
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Step 18: Dress to impress.
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Step 19: Go out alone.Do not go out in a large group of girls and do not go out with a group of guys or a mixed group of guys and girls.
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Step 20: Avoid loud areas.
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Step 21: Give him a chance to make his move.
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Step 22: Approach him.
Detailed Guide
This might seem like an obvious point, but that doesn't make it any less worth mentioning.
If you spend the entire night avoiding the guy you're interested in because you find yourself in a panic about what to say and how to act, he will probably interpret your avoidance as disinterest, instead.
Once the conversation has been going on for a little while, start talking about yourself.
Your interests, friends, work, and family are all fair game, but you should probably avoid talking about ex-boyfriends or failed relationships right away.
If your conversations stay centered on “safe” topics like the weather or the party, you are keeping your guard up, and this can make a guy think that you do not feel open to his advances.
By letting him know a little about you, you can let him know that you are interested in him enough to invite him into your personal space and into your life. , While talking about yourself is important, asking the guy about himself is just as essential.
This gesture tells the guy that you are interested in learning more about him, which translates into you being interested in the guy himself.
You also need to reply as he is talking about his life to show that you really are paying attention and really are interested in knowing what he's all about. , Forced laughter is never advised, but if you find something even mildly humorous, you should let him know you appreciate his humor with a laugh.
Even a quiet giggle can speak volumes about your interest in the guy.
Forced laughter is usually pretty obvious, and forcing a laugh will make it seem as though you pity the poor guy rather than appreciate him.
Moreover, if you have to force yourself to laugh at his jokes, you should be asking yourself if you are really as interested in this guy as you first thought. , A little playful banter can be effective, but avoid stepping all over the poor guy's ego.
In contemporary terms, a little sarcasm or dry wit can be very attractive, but it must be accompanied by body language that communicates your interest in order to let the guy know that you are being playful rather than critical.
Teasing should be playful in nature.
For example, if his tie is crooked and he hurriedly tries to straighten it, you could laugh and tease that crooked ties are all the rage right now.
If your teasing remark gets him joking back or at least gets a smile, you did it right.
On the other hand, any teasing you do should not be overly critical and should not cut him down.
For instance, if he is nervous around you and accidentally spills his drink on your dress, you should not tease about him ruining a favorite dress or a family heirloom since this will only make him feel worse about his mistake. , Everyone can appreciate a good compliment, as long as it seems genuine.
Complimenting a guy's appearance is the easiest, most straight-forward way of letting a guy know you're interested.
You could also throw out a compliment or two about the guy's personality, though, especially after you've been talking to him for a little while.
Compliments on his appearance can be about him or his clothes.
For example, you could say, “Your eyes are amazingly expressive,” but you could also say, “Your shirt is great.
That color blue really brings out your eyes.” , Really, the easiest way to end a conversation in a way that let's your guy know that you want to see him again is to come straight out and say something along the lines of, "I had a wonderful time talking with you tonight.
I really hope we can do it again sometime."Working in some nonverbal cues can also drive the point home.
Try saying this line while lightly touching his arm.
With any luck, your guy will ask for your phone number at this point.
If you can tell that he is clearly interested in you but too smitten to ask, you could always ask him for his number or offer yours. , Eyes are “windows to the soul,” so eye contact is a vital element of letting a guy know that you're interested.
That said, you do not want to stare the guy down straight-on.
A better move would be to make eye contact, drop your eyes to the floor, then slowly sweep them back up to meet his again.Supposedly, by looking down after initial eye contact and dragging your eyes back up slowly, you are sending a signal that you feel attracted to the guy you saw and are processing your internal emotions about it.
By returning eye contact after the pause, you tell the guy that, after processing your emotions, the prognosis is good for him.
Staring the guy straight on often suggests that you are not affected by him at all. , Just about everyone appreciates a friendly smile, even when flirtation and romance are not the order of the day.
Smiling implies friendliness and openness, and before you can let a guy know that you are interested in him romantically, you need to use this simple gesture to make yourself seem inviting enough to be around.
That said, you should only smile if it feels natural.
If you feel nervous or otherwise don't feel like smiling, and smiling you do can come across as being forced and awkward.
That will only turn the guy in question away. , Never underestimate the power of physical contact.
Brushing your hand against his arm during conversation is a fantastic way to bridge the distance between the two of you and suggest that you desire some sort of physical intimacy with the guy you're brushing against.
Be aware of the fact that some forms of touch are more suggestive than others.
For example, touching a guy's arm is playful and flirtatious, but fairly safe.
Placing your hand on a guy's thigh, however, is like implying that you want into his bed, and soon. , If you cross your arms and keep the rest of your body equally closed off, you will send a clear signal that you want the guy to go away.
If the rest of your body language is open, though, crossing your arms could actually send a good message to the guy in question.
When done the right way, it can be a subtle way of drawing attention to your chest and acknowledging a primal sort of attraction.
In order to do it well, you should keep one hand free and expressive while the other one lightly casually the opposite arm in a fold. , By moving in closer, you convey the message that you want to be closer to the guy you move in toward.
If you lean back or move away, you would essentially be saying that you want to put more distance between you and the person you're conversing with.
Lean in naturally and gracefully.
The best time to do this is when you are already in conversation with they guy.
Leaning in suggests that you are hanging on his every word, which is a clear sign of interest. , Crossing and uncrossing your legs can convey a sense of nervousness, which can let the guy in question know that he is really getting under your skin.
Do this occasionally to convey your attraction to the guy, but avoid overdoing it, otherwise he may perceive that he makes you uncomfortable in a bad way or feel as though he has too much power over you.
You can also use leg crossing as a way to express bold, direct interest.
If the rest of your body language is confident and you cross your legs to show them off, it can be interpreted as a seductive action.
If you intentionally point your top leg toward him, that can be interpreted as an even clearer sign of attraction. , Twirling the ends of your hair in between your fingers can also convey nervousness and let a guy know that he is getting under your skin and into your thoughts.
As with arm crossing and leg crossing, though, there are limits.
Playing with your hair can express boredom if you do not keep the rest of your body language open.
Tossing your hair over your shoulder can also be a sexy gesture.
Long hair is a feminine quality, and drawing attention to your hair draws attention to your femininity.
Doing this suggests to a guy that you really, really want him to notice your womanly charms. , Licking your lips is a dead giveaway that you are interested in a guy.
When you feel attraction, your mouth and lips start to dry out, and you impulsively lick your lips as a way of moisturizing them.
Licking your lips also suggests that you are, subconsciously or consciously, thinking about kissing the guy. , Splitting your attention between multiple guys and flirting with multiple guys may give the impression that you have a naturally flirtatious personality, thereby making your interest in the guy less apparent. , If you meet a guy when you're already out and about, it might be too late to change your wardrobe, but if plan your outfit ahead of time whenever you can.
Wear clothes that flatter your figure and show off your best attributes.
Note, however, that this does not mean you should dress provocatively.
Wearing tight clothes that bare your cleavage, legs, back, and midriff can seem desperate, which might make a guy think that you are of the mindset that any guy will do as long as you can get whatever you crave from him.
Focus on one area of your body to emphasize.
If a shirt really plays up your cleavage, avoid matching it with a skirt that really shows off your legs. , In each scenario, a guy you do not know may find it difficult to approach you.
You do not necessarily need to be completely alone, but definitely opt for small groups over large groups.
If you are in a large group of girls, a guy might hesitate to approach you if he does not want to entertain a whole group and only wants to pay attention to you.
Any group that includes guys sends off the message that you might not be available, and a guy might completely miss the signs you're throwing at him one he gets this in his mind. , When you decide to take a break from the activities going on around you, stand or sit in a fairly quiet area.
A guy will be more likely to approach you there than he would be if he thinks he will need to shout above the noise for you to hear him.
Outdoor areas tend to be preferable to indoor areas, since it is easier to break away to a quiet location outside than it is in a packed, noisy room. , Never leave the scene too early.
You might think you've been laying on a full night's worth of signals in 30 minutes, but some guys can be shy about approaching women they do not know.
If you think the guy in question might be interested in you, as well, make sure he has plenty of time to approach you before you give up.
If you're at a bar, party, or reception, keep in mind that the guy you have your eye on might feel like he needs a few glasses of “liquid courage” before he can approach the pretty woman making eyes at him.
Give him a chance to work up the nerve. , If all else fails, it is perfectly acceptable for you to approach a guy you are interested in.
It can even be a good move if the guy has been dropping hints that he is interested but too shy to make the first move.
By making the first move, you create the impression that you are a confident person, and confidence is a highly appealing quality.
Making the first move is also a clear declaration of your interest in him.
About the Author
Samuel Griffin
Writer and educator with a focus on practical crafts knowledge.
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