How to Like People
Respect everyone’s journey through life., Treat each action individually., Accept that they are a mystery., Respect their individuality.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Respect everyone’s journey through life.
In conversation, avoid fixating on what they happen to be saying at this moment.
Whether you approve or disapprove of their comments, set your reaction aside for the time being.
Keep in mind that everyone is moving along a path in life, and not permanently stuck where they happen to be right now.
Embrace the fact that everyone changes.Ask follow-up questions to better understand where they are coming from instead of responding immediately to what they just said.
For example: "Why do you feel that way?" or "What are you basing your opinion on?" Remember that even though you might not like where they are right now, they will be somewhere new tomorrow. -
Step 2: Treat each action individually.
Refrain from immediately adding each little thing that you don’t like about someone to an ever-growing list entitled “Things I Don’t Like About This Person.” Instead, approach each moment as its own unique experience.
Give them the chance to say and do things without immediately being judged for it based on past missteps.Apply this approach even when the same “bad” behavior appears to resurface again and again.
Remember, even if someone is, say, consistently late in meeting you, the reasons may be different each time.
Be aware that focusing on a growing list of things you don’t like might lead you to make snap judgments that you wouldn’t otherwise make.
For instance, say you thought they were a little rude to your waiter at the beginning of your meal.
If you hold onto to that, you might think they are a jerk for only leaving a small tip at the end, even though the service really was kind of poor. , Be prepared to never fully understand someone, even despite your best efforts.
Bear in mind that you aren’t telepathic, and so you may never know why someone said this or said that.
Don’t limit yourself to liking only those people you think you understand well.
Open yourself to liking people even when they confound you.Unless they did something that is clearly wrong (like shooting someone else in the foot just because they didn’t bring them a beverage), always keep in mind that you don’t know the full story.Avoid judging people for their actions if you don’t know the full reason behind them.
For example, if someone doesn’t call you when they said they would, don’t take it as a slight.
Keep in mind that they may have lost their phone, been faced with an emergency, or any number of things. , Whether they are your best friend, a stranger, or a nemesis, remember that everyone has flaws.
More importantly, remember that the only person’s flaws that you can fix are your own.
Accept that each person is their own person.
Don’t give them the undue burden of living up to your expectations.Demanding that someone must change according to your liking may blind you to their positive traits.
For instance, fixating on someone’s refusal to be swayed by your own beliefs about, say, the justice system may frustrate you to the point that you begin to undervalue how dependable they are when you need their assistance. -
Step 3: Accept that they are a mystery.
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Step 4: Respect their individuality.
Detailed Guide
In conversation, avoid fixating on what they happen to be saying at this moment.
Whether you approve or disapprove of their comments, set your reaction aside for the time being.
Keep in mind that everyone is moving along a path in life, and not permanently stuck where they happen to be right now.
Embrace the fact that everyone changes.Ask follow-up questions to better understand where they are coming from instead of responding immediately to what they just said.
For example: "Why do you feel that way?" or "What are you basing your opinion on?" Remember that even though you might not like where they are right now, they will be somewhere new tomorrow.
Refrain from immediately adding each little thing that you don’t like about someone to an ever-growing list entitled “Things I Don’t Like About This Person.” Instead, approach each moment as its own unique experience.
Give them the chance to say and do things without immediately being judged for it based on past missteps.Apply this approach even when the same “bad” behavior appears to resurface again and again.
Remember, even if someone is, say, consistently late in meeting you, the reasons may be different each time.
Be aware that focusing on a growing list of things you don’t like might lead you to make snap judgments that you wouldn’t otherwise make.
For instance, say you thought they were a little rude to your waiter at the beginning of your meal.
If you hold onto to that, you might think they are a jerk for only leaving a small tip at the end, even though the service really was kind of poor. , Be prepared to never fully understand someone, even despite your best efforts.
Bear in mind that you aren’t telepathic, and so you may never know why someone said this or said that.
Don’t limit yourself to liking only those people you think you understand well.
Open yourself to liking people even when they confound you.Unless they did something that is clearly wrong (like shooting someone else in the foot just because they didn’t bring them a beverage), always keep in mind that you don’t know the full story.Avoid judging people for their actions if you don’t know the full reason behind them.
For example, if someone doesn’t call you when they said they would, don’t take it as a slight.
Keep in mind that they may have lost their phone, been faced with an emergency, or any number of things. , Whether they are your best friend, a stranger, or a nemesis, remember that everyone has flaws.
More importantly, remember that the only person’s flaws that you can fix are your own.
Accept that each person is their own person.
Don’t give them the undue burden of living up to your expectations.Demanding that someone must change according to your liking may blind you to their positive traits.
For instance, fixating on someone’s refusal to be swayed by your own beliefs about, say, the justice system may frustrate you to the point that you begin to undervalue how dependable they are when you need their assistance.
About the Author
Karen Gomez
Experienced content creator specializing in creative arts guides and tutorials.
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