How to Live With a Perfectionist

Step-by-Step Guide

1. 1

   Step 1: Set up roles and responsibilities in the home.

   To make life easier for both you and the perfectionist, you should establish house roles and responsibilities so it is clear who is accountable for certain tasks.
   
   This will help to prevent any arguments about household chores and duties.You should sit down with the perfectionist and create a list of roles and responsibilities.
   
   Go room by room and note any tasks that need to get done, such as cleaning the bathroom once a week or sweeping the floor in the hallway once a day.
   
   Divide these tasks among yourselves and note when they need to get done so it is clear who is responsible for what and by when.
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   Step 2: Ask the perfectionist how they like things to get done.

   Often, perfectionists have a way they like things to be done and may get upset if a task is not completed based on their standards.
   
   Communicate with the perfectionist so you are aware of how they do things and how their way contrasts to your way.Have a discussion with the perfectionist about what they do when they clean the counter or sweep the floors.
   
   Allow them to show you how they do things so you can observe their expectations.
   
   This will give you a better sense of how they like things done and make you aware of their expectations. , Once you have looked at how you complete household duties and how the perfectionist completes their duties, you should work together to come to a compromise over how things should be done.
   
   This way, you are less likely to get into arguments and will know how both of you will complete the duties in the home.For example, if the perfectionist prefers meals a certain way, you may agree that she cooks most of the dinners for you both as long as you take out the garbage and keep the kitchen clean.
   
   Or, you may both agree to sweep the floor a certain way so there are no issues when it gets done by either you or the perfectionist.
   
   You may also discuss setting a routine where you compromise on wake up time in the morning or quiet time at night.
   
   If the perfectionist prefers getting up early but you tend to sleep in, ask her to be quiet in the mornings.
   
   If she wants to set quiet time at night to 9 pm and you would prefer 10 pm, compromise by setting quiet time at 9:30 pm. , Many perfectionists get thrown off if their normal routine and established rules are changed or shifted suddenly.
   
   Rather than spring the change on the perfectionist, let her know ahead of time so she can prepare and adjust.For example, if you are planning to have a guest stay with you for the weekend, let the perfectionist know at least one week ahead of time that this is happening.
   
   If you are roommates, explain where the person will be staying in the home and how long they will be staying.
   
   You should also make sure the guest knows the house rules and agrees to follow them. , Though you may try your best to stick to the household rules and routines, there may be times where you do not have the time or energy to do a household chore based on the perfectionist's expectations.
   
   You should discuss setting boundaries with the perfectionist so there are spaces in the home where you can follow your own rules and guidelines when it comes to cleanliness.
   
   Setting boundaries will help to prevent conflict later and allow you to be yourself in your space.For example, you may say to the perfectionist, "I will maintain all shared spaces, like the kitchen, the living room, and the bathroom, according to your expectations.
   
   But my bedroom is my area and I do not have to follow your rules when I am in my bedroom."
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   Step 3: Find a middle ground and stick to it.

4. 4

   Step 4: Let the perfectionist know if there will be disruption in the household routine.

5. 5

   Step 5: Set boundaries around household space and household roles.

Detailed Guide

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