How to Stop Anger from Getting You into Trouble
Be conscious of when you're about to blow., Take whatever immediate action you can to cool off., Step away and reevaluate., Try to understand why people do what they do., Try to understand why you feel this way., Ask for help., Vent your feelings in...
Step-by-Step Guide
-
Step 1: Be conscious of when you're about to blow.
Maybe you had a hard day.
Maybe someone had been hurting you or irritating you for a long time.
Don't test yourself.
Try to know how long and how much you can take of something before you're going to act on anger. -
Step 2: Take whatever immediate action you can to cool off.
Whether it is counting to ten or going for a walk, it is best that you put yourself in a state in which you can cool off.
Whatever needs doing is better done later than poorly.
It is important that you take care of yourself first and foremost. , Stepping back makes it much easier to avoid acting on impulse, and helps gain another perspective.
Try to excuse yourself as politely as possible.
Storming out is sometimes worrisome and leaves you on a bad note with someone or something you need to make peace with and makes it more difficult to deal with the situation in a healthy manner.
Stepping away is the best way to ensure that you won't do or say something harmful to yourself or others on impulse. , Like you, others may be struggling to cope with their anger.
Sometimes people say mean things or miscommunicate.
If someone says or does something mean to you, try to understand why, and then try to resolve the situation when both of you are in a state and position in which you can communicate and listen. As hurt as you may feel, and as reluctant as you may be to see another side, it is better to work through the problem than to let it stew and continue to affect you.You may not think that someone deserves or to tell their side after they have hurt you.
You may not think that but still be reluctant to work it out.
Don't let problems fester and linger.
It not only affects the people around you, but yourself as well.
Agree that you want a conversation.
Not an argument.
Avoid talking over each other.
Listen.
The point of talking it out is to understand each other.
Avoid making accusations.
How you word something is often equally as important as how you say it.
Instead of saying "You do this to me." try "When you do...
I feel...," Not only does it help them receive what you have to say better, but it helps them emphasize and realize that their actions affect you.
Have a plan of what you want to talk about.
Writing down what you want to say and resolve prevents tangents and rants.
Rants can result in you getting upset, and it will become difficult to keep the conversation from turning into an argument Own up to what you may have done.
Try to walk away with an agreement or plan of action on how the both of you will work on refraining from or revising what struck up the argument. , Strong and persistent anger isn't a problem most people face.
Maybe someone hurt you very badly and you don't know how else to cope.
Maybe you are frustrated with your situation or relationships.
It is important to know what is making you so upset so you can try to deal with it in the best way possible and maybe even a solution.
It can be from making changes to going back to square one.
You might decide things as important as moving or taking a new job.
You may end a bad relationship.
You may take up a new hobby or try to find a new circle of friends.Taking steps to living a healthier life style will help you control your anger. , There is no shame in seeking professional help.
Whatever diagnosis you may get won't define you, and it will be a step closer to getting better.
Seeing a counselor or therapist can help you work through your feelings and have guidance and insight on ways to live with it and cope while you recover. , You can write it out, talk to a friend, or turn to a hobby.
Maybe working out will help relieve you of your frustration.
Maybe expressing yourself through an art will.
Not only will doing something you love make you feel better, but it is a healthier solution than doing something that could hurt yourself or others. , When you are angry, you are not thinking clearly.
You don't want to make decisions that affect you and your livelihood when you are not in your best state of mind. , Sometimes you want to look for anything to blame but yourself.
The best way to put your wrong doings behind you is to own up to them.
Apologize to who you hurt, and take responsibility.
Your actions are your own.
Apologize because you owe it to them and you acknowledge what you did was wrong and are sincerely sorry.
Don't apologize just to be forgiven.
Then you need to forgive yourself and move on.
Dwelling on every mistake you make is only going to make you more frustrated in loose faith in yourself and your ability to do good.
You need to accept the fact that you are going to slip up and make mistakes but you can keep going and you can do better.
It takes commitment and hard work, but it's worth it. -
Step 3: Step away and reevaluate.
-
Step 4: Try to understand why people do what they do.
-
Step 5: Try to understand why you feel this way.
-
Step 6: Ask for help.
-
Step 7: Vent your feelings in a healthy way.
-
Step 8: Try not to make important decisions when you're angry.
-
Step 9: Own up to what you've done and forgive yourself.
Detailed Guide
Maybe you had a hard day.
Maybe someone had been hurting you or irritating you for a long time.
Don't test yourself.
Try to know how long and how much you can take of something before you're going to act on anger.
Whether it is counting to ten or going for a walk, it is best that you put yourself in a state in which you can cool off.
Whatever needs doing is better done later than poorly.
It is important that you take care of yourself first and foremost. , Stepping back makes it much easier to avoid acting on impulse, and helps gain another perspective.
Try to excuse yourself as politely as possible.
Storming out is sometimes worrisome and leaves you on a bad note with someone or something you need to make peace with and makes it more difficult to deal with the situation in a healthy manner.
Stepping away is the best way to ensure that you won't do or say something harmful to yourself or others on impulse. , Like you, others may be struggling to cope with their anger.
Sometimes people say mean things or miscommunicate.
If someone says or does something mean to you, try to understand why, and then try to resolve the situation when both of you are in a state and position in which you can communicate and listen. As hurt as you may feel, and as reluctant as you may be to see another side, it is better to work through the problem than to let it stew and continue to affect you.You may not think that someone deserves or to tell their side after they have hurt you.
You may not think that but still be reluctant to work it out.
Don't let problems fester and linger.
It not only affects the people around you, but yourself as well.
Agree that you want a conversation.
Not an argument.
Avoid talking over each other.
Listen.
The point of talking it out is to understand each other.
Avoid making accusations.
How you word something is often equally as important as how you say it.
Instead of saying "You do this to me." try "When you do...
I feel...," Not only does it help them receive what you have to say better, but it helps them emphasize and realize that their actions affect you.
Have a plan of what you want to talk about.
Writing down what you want to say and resolve prevents tangents and rants.
Rants can result in you getting upset, and it will become difficult to keep the conversation from turning into an argument Own up to what you may have done.
Try to walk away with an agreement or plan of action on how the both of you will work on refraining from or revising what struck up the argument. , Strong and persistent anger isn't a problem most people face.
Maybe someone hurt you very badly and you don't know how else to cope.
Maybe you are frustrated with your situation or relationships.
It is important to know what is making you so upset so you can try to deal with it in the best way possible and maybe even a solution.
It can be from making changes to going back to square one.
You might decide things as important as moving or taking a new job.
You may end a bad relationship.
You may take up a new hobby or try to find a new circle of friends.Taking steps to living a healthier life style will help you control your anger. , There is no shame in seeking professional help.
Whatever diagnosis you may get won't define you, and it will be a step closer to getting better.
Seeing a counselor or therapist can help you work through your feelings and have guidance and insight on ways to live with it and cope while you recover. , You can write it out, talk to a friend, or turn to a hobby.
Maybe working out will help relieve you of your frustration.
Maybe expressing yourself through an art will.
Not only will doing something you love make you feel better, but it is a healthier solution than doing something that could hurt yourself or others. , When you are angry, you are not thinking clearly.
You don't want to make decisions that affect you and your livelihood when you are not in your best state of mind. , Sometimes you want to look for anything to blame but yourself.
The best way to put your wrong doings behind you is to own up to them.
Apologize to who you hurt, and take responsibility.
Your actions are your own.
Apologize because you owe it to them and you acknowledge what you did was wrong and are sincerely sorry.
Don't apologize just to be forgiven.
Then you need to forgive yourself and move on.
Dwelling on every mistake you make is only going to make you more frustrated in loose faith in yourself and your ability to do good.
You need to accept the fact that you are going to slip up and make mistakes but you can keep going and you can do better.
It takes commitment and hard work, but it's worth it.
About the Author
Marilyn Howard
Writer and educator with a focus on practical hobbies knowledge.
Rate This Guide
How helpful was this guide? Click to rate: