How to Stop the Urge to Self Harm

Be patient with yourself., Identify your triggers., See if you can get rid of the thing that triggers you., Find an alternative that fills the same need for release., Tell someone what is going on., Tell your doctor., Start doing something that is...

9 Steps 3 min read Medium

Step-by-Step Guide

  1. Step 1: Be patient with yourself.

    You are facing an incredible amount of pain, and it takes strength to get to where you are now.

    It will take time to recover, and you will have relapses here and there.

    That's okay.

    You need to be able to forgive yourself in order to truly move on.
  2. Step 2: Identify your triggers.

    What happens before you self harm? It's important to understand why you hurt yourself, so you can eliminate the trigger (if possible) or figure out a better way to cope with it.

    External events (parents fighting, being criticized, failing to meet your expectations) Internal thoughts (self-hatred, panic, depression) , In some situations, your trigger can be completely deleted from your life.

    Move away from your horrible uncle, dump your abusive girlfriend, or take a lighter schedule at school.

    This may take a serious attitude adjustment, and may require a lot of effort.

    However, your health is worth it. , The idea of harm reduction is replacing a very hurtful action with something that causes less harm.

    You don't have to go cold turkey—find something that causes less serious damage to your body.

    Snap a rubber band on your wrist and feel the burn.

    Punch couch cushions or a mattress.

    Use a red marker to slowly draw red lines on your wrist.

    Cut/rip paper (digital or physical; try going through your recycling bin).

    Play active sports or throw a ball at a wall (not near any windows).

    Keep a journal. , Find a trusted adult, friend, or partner and talk to them about what you've been going through.

    They can offer you emotional support and help you figure out what to do next.

    Remember, asking for help is an act of bravery, and you have no reason to be ashamed.

    If you don't have anyone to tell, call a hotline or go to a text-based site like Crisis Chat. , Cutting can be a symptom of a chemical imbalance in the brain.

    Medication or therapy may be able to help you get back on track.

    There is nothing wrong with getting the help you need.

    Your doctor can help you figure out good alternatives, and can recommend things and monitor your progress.

    Tell them about this article. , Volunteer at a soup kitchen, improve articles at LifeGuide Hub, babysit your little sister, or take up causes that matter to you.

    Making a contribution to the world will help you feel better about yourself, and give you extra proof that you make the world a better place.

    If you feel so tired that volunteering seems impossible to you, this means you are seriously ill.

    Tell your doctor right away and ask for a depression screening.

    You can get help, and you don't have to face this forever. , Instead of turning to the bathroom when something bad happens in your life, call up someone or find them.

    Find several people who make you feel heard and loved, so you can turn to someone else if one of them isn't available right away. , This may be a parent, sibling, friend, partner, or someone else who matters to you.

    Turn to them when you need help.

    They can support you through this difficult time.

    Spend one-on-one time with them at least once a week.

    Give your razors and sharp objects to them.

    When you think about cutting, remember how much they love you and care about you.

    When you hit a milestone (one week without cutting, one month, etc.), share it with them.

    See how proud of you they are!
  3. Step 3: See if you can get rid of the thing that triggers you.

  4. Step 4: Find an alternative that fills the same need for release.

  5. Step 5: Tell someone what is going on.

  6. Step 6: Tell your doctor.

  7. Step 7: Start doing something that is meaningful to you.

  8. Step 8: Find people whom you can turn to when you're sad.

  9. Step 9: Find a support person.

Detailed Guide

You are facing an incredible amount of pain, and it takes strength to get to where you are now.

It will take time to recover, and you will have relapses here and there.

That's okay.

You need to be able to forgive yourself in order to truly move on.

What happens before you self harm? It's important to understand why you hurt yourself, so you can eliminate the trigger (if possible) or figure out a better way to cope with it.

External events (parents fighting, being criticized, failing to meet your expectations) Internal thoughts (self-hatred, panic, depression) , In some situations, your trigger can be completely deleted from your life.

Move away from your horrible uncle, dump your abusive girlfriend, or take a lighter schedule at school.

This may take a serious attitude adjustment, and may require a lot of effort.

However, your health is worth it. , The idea of harm reduction is replacing a very hurtful action with something that causes less harm.

You don't have to go cold turkey—find something that causes less serious damage to your body.

Snap a rubber band on your wrist and feel the burn.

Punch couch cushions or a mattress.

Use a red marker to slowly draw red lines on your wrist.

Cut/rip paper (digital or physical; try going through your recycling bin).

Play active sports or throw a ball at a wall (not near any windows).

Keep a journal. , Find a trusted adult, friend, or partner and talk to them about what you've been going through.

They can offer you emotional support and help you figure out what to do next.

Remember, asking for help is an act of bravery, and you have no reason to be ashamed.

If you don't have anyone to tell, call a hotline or go to a text-based site like Crisis Chat. , Cutting can be a symptom of a chemical imbalance in the brain.

Medication or therapy may be able to help you get back on track.

There is nothing wrong with getting the help you need.

Your doctor can help you figure out good alternatives, and can recommend things and monitor your progress.

Tell them about this article. , Volunteer at a soup kitchen, improve articles at LifeGuide Hub, babysit your little sister, or take up causes that matter to you.

Making a contribution to the world will help you feel better about yourself, and give you extra proof that you make the world a better place.

If you feel so tired that volunteering seems impossible to you, this means you are seriously ill.

Tell your doctor right away and ask for a depression screening.

You can get help, and you don't have to face this forever. , Instead of turning to the bathroom when something bad happens in your life, call up someone or find them.

Find several people who make you feel heard and loved, so you can turn to someone else if one of them isn't available right away. , This may be a parent, sibling, friend, partner, or someone else who matters to you.

Turn to them when you need help.

They can support you through this difficult time.

Spend one-on-one time with them at least once a week.

Give your razors and sharp objects to them.

When you think about cutting, remember how much they love you and care about you.

When you hit a milestone (one week without cutting, one month, etc.), share it with them.

See how proud of you they are!

About the Author

C

Christopher Martinez

Brings years of experience writing about hobbies and related subjects.

41 articles
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