How to Tell Someone You're an Atheist
Know what you want to say., Practice with an open minded person., Communicate directly with loved ones first., Choose a good time and place to talk., Use “I” statements.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Know what you want to say.
Having your talking points planned out can be a huge help.
This will allow you to focus on the important parts of the conversation and get your message across to the other person.
If you need to, practice in front of a mirror or write out your main points before the conversation.An example of something you might say would be “I know that the rest of the family is religious, but I simply do not believe the same things.” -
Step 2: Practice with an open minded person.
Some friends or family members will be more open and accepting than others.
These people make a good place to start when coming out as an atheist.
They are likely to have a positive and compassionate reaction.
This will build your confidence to approach your less open-minded loved ones.
For example, you might start by asking your uncle “Why is that you never go to church with everyone else?” Keep in mind that it may not mean he is atheist at all, but you can now steer the conversation in that direction by saying something like “Church is awkward for me because I am atheist.” If you have a friend or family member that is openly atheist, it might be a good idea to have a conversation with them about how they came out. , Posting the information to Facebook, or telling a friend of a friend will almost surely lead to your loved ones finding out secondhand.
Word travels fast, and your closest connections will likely be upset by the fact that you didn’t tell them yourself.
You should make time to talk to parents, best friends, siblings, etc. before coming out publicly.
Saying something like “I need to talk to you about something, and I wanted you to hear it from me,” is a good way to start this conversation with a loved one.
Naturally, they will ask what it is, and you can continue with “I am an atheist.” Failing to tell those closest to you may alienate them.
The task of telling them you are atheist can be challenging enough without added tension. , You want your loved ones to be in the right frame of mind to hear you out, instead of just lashing out at you.
If you plan to tell your religious friends or family about your lack of belief, you should do it in private, with plenty of time to discuss the matter, and at a time that they are in a good mood.A good time and place to discuss this might be at a family dinner.
On the contrary, it may be a bad idea to bring it up at your parent’s workplace, or even worse, in their church. , Coming out as an atheist can seem like a way to rebel, or can come across as confrontational to the religious establishment in which you were raised (or formerly identified).
Make sure that you frame the conversation around your lack of religion and not the fact that you find the other person's belief to be “wrong.”Try saying things like “I personally do not believe that God is real,” in place of things like “Believing in God is absolutely absurd.
There is no proof!” -
Step 3: Communicate directly with loved ones first.
-
Step 4: Choose a good time and place to talk.
-
Step 5: Use “I” statements.
Detailed Guide
Having your talking points planned out can be a huge help.
This will allow you to focus on the important parts of the conversation and get your message across to the other person.
If you need to, practice in front of a mirror or write out your main points before the conversation.An example of something you might say would be “I know that the rest of the family is religious, but I simply do not believe the same things.”
Some friends or family members will be more open and accepting than others.
These people make a good place to start when coming out as an atheist.
They are likely to have a positive and compassionate reaction.
This will build your confidence to approach your less open-minded loved ones.
For example, you might start by asking your uncle “Why is that you never go to church with everyone else?” Keep in mind that it may not mean he is atheist at all, but you can now steer the conversation in that direction by saying something like “Church is awkward for me because I am atheist.” If you have a friend or family member that is openly atheist, it might be a good idea to have a conversation with them about how they came out. , Posting the information to Facebook, or telling a friend of a friend will almost surely lead to your loved ones finding out secondhand.
Word travels fast, and your closest connections will likely be upset by the fact that you didn’t tell them yourself.
You should make time to talk to parents, best friends, siblings, etc. before coming out publicly.
Saying something like “I need to talk to you about something, and I wanted you to hear it from me,” is a good way to start this conversation with a loved one.
Naturally, they will ask what it is, and you can continue with “I am an atheist.” Failing to tell those closest to you may alienate them.
The task of telling them you are atheist can be challenging enough without added tension. , You want your loved ones to be in the right frame of mind to hear you out, instead of just lashing out at you.
If you plan to tell your religious friends or family about your lack of belief, you should do it in private, with plenty of time to discuss the matter, and at a time that they are in a good mood.A good time and place to discuss this might be at a family dinner.
On the contrary, it may be a bad idea to bring it up at your parent’s workplace, or even worse, in their church. , Coming out as an atheist can seem like a way to rebel, or can come across as confrontational to the religious establishment in which you were raised (or formerly identified).
Make sure that you frame the conversation around your lack of religion and not the fact that you find the other person's belief to be “wrong.”Try saying things like “I personally do not believe that God is real,” in place of things like “Believing in God is absolutely absurd.
There is no proof!”
About the Author
Debra Brooks
Debra Brooks has dedicated 3 years to mastering museums libraries. As a content creator, Debra focuses on providing actionable tips and step-by-step guides.
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