How to Turn a Girl On
Warm your girl up., Make her feel you find her attractive., Be the best version of yourself., Be confident, even if you don't act like it., Clean up., Know how to treat a girl like a lady., Start with slow, gentle touches., Whisper in her ear...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Warm your girl up.
The key to turning a girl on is being patient.
As fast as guys usually get turned on, girls, and some women, need about that much build up.
This means that you'll have to lay a little ground work and take the seduction part nice and slow.
A huge part of warming her up, of course, is making her feel comfortable and safe.
You're going to see a lot of steps below about respecting her, seeking consent, and otherwise doing things that you might not think of as "turn-ons".
Don't neglect them, they're important.
Sex is very mental for many girls and women and if you help them by making it so that they don't have to worry, then that's half the battle. -
Step 2: Make her feel you find her attractive.
You know that warm, fuzzy feeling you get when you find out that someone thinks you're good looking? That's what you want to create for her.
The fact that you think she's lovely to look at is a significant turn-on.
Here's how to communicate it without going overboard:
Say "Hey, pretty lady" or "Hello, beautiful" when you greet her.
It's simple and short, but direct (and potentially patronising
- use with caution).
Pay her a compliment.
Lower the volume and tone of your voice slightly, and say something like "You look amazing today" or "I love your eyes."
Be the person who's honestly kind, a person who respects her and thinks she's more beautiful than the most picturesque sunset.
Be the person who works hard and makes it easier for her to work hard, by helping to shoulder her burdens.
This will all mostly keep you from turning her off! , Some girls like a guy who is nervous and even klutzy around her, but don't overdo it.
If the girl is shy, be confident; if the girl is confident, feel free to act somewhat shy.
Keep your shoulders straight and your chin high, and don't be afraid to look her in the eyes.
You're communicating through your body language that you're strong, brave, and worthy of her attention. , Shower, put on deodorant, shave, brush your teeth and wear clean clothes.
If you're feeling up to it, you can also do your hair and put on a light spray of cologne.
Knowing that you're at your physical best will help you act confident and in-charge. , Save the dirty jokes and discussions of bodily functions for your guy friends.
When you're with the girl you like, be polite.
Use good table manners, hold the door open for her, and say please and thank you.
Good manners aren't necessarily attractive, but bad manners are definitely unattractive, so play it safe. , You can do these in passing, at the end of a date, while you're watching a movie, whenever — the point is that they don't have to be saved for when you're already making out.
They can, however, indicate that you're interested in doing a little more. , Ears are an erogenous zone for both sexes, and the light pressure of your breath will probably feel good.
Saying the right things will also turn her on.
Try something like: "I couldn't stop thinking about you today". , Lightly brush the back of your fingers over the side of her face.
Bonus points if you can lock eyes with her at the same time. , You can gently run your thumb over her hairline if your arm is already around her shoulders, or offer to give her a neck rub.
Keep your motions slow and light. , Always be confident to make the first move; hold her hand.
If you're holding hands, lightly stroke the inside of her wrist or her palm.
A few slow kisses on the inside of the wrist could work, too. , The scalp is a sensitive area for most people, and the light (repeat: light, not hard) tugging that comes from you playing with her hair will feel nice.
Run your fingers through it, twirl it, or stroke it. , If you're fairly sure it won't be unwelcome, try laying a hand on the top of her thigh.
This works best if you're both sitting down.
Let it rest there lightly.
If she seems receptive, you can try slowly moving your thumb back and forth over her leg, keeping the rest of your hand where it is. , If it's done right, a kiss can be the most effective way of turning a girl on.
Keep your breath fresh with some gum or mouthwash and keep your lips loose.
Tight, puckered lips is how you kiss your grandma! You should also keep the tongue action delicate (at first).
The motions should be light, soft and alternate between fast and slow.
Know where to put your hands.
The back of her neck, the sides of her face, or around her waist are all good areas for your hands to rest during a kiss. , If you touch a girl in certain areas without her consent, it is sexual assault.
A simple "Is this OK?" is enough.
If she says yes, you're all clear; if she says no, stop immediately. , Many girls are way more sexual than you, potentially.
Give them credit for that and there's nothing wrong with telling them how much you want them (once you've gotten your foot in the door a bit).
This actually turns them on! Think about it: you feel turned on when you feel desirable too.
Don't be really gross about it but don't be afraid to tell them how sexy you think they are and how you can't wait to get them in bed. , If you tried some of the suggestions above and she seemed receptive, here are some more intimate areas you can work with, using light touches and soft, slow kisses.
Neck, throat, collarbones and shoulders Feet and ankles The small of her back (toward the bottom of the spine) Back of the knees Inner thighs Ears The inside of her upper arm , If you find an area where she likes to be touched, don't overuse it.
Instead, back away from it for a while and slowly make your way back, touching everything around and up to it.
The anticipation will make it more intense when you finally do touch her. , Leaving before the other person gets bored is a good rule for most social interactions, but it's particularly important here.
If you break off contact while she's still interested, you'll be on her mind constantly. , Because many girls take longer to warm up, repeated...friction can cause skin to become sensitive or even painful.
Consider getting a quality, water-soluble lubricant to keep everything slick and sexy-feeling if you plan on some prolonged fun times, but, for most girls additional lubrication shouldn't be required if they are turned on.
Don't forget that a lack of natural lubrication can be a sign that your girl isn't turned on-at all! This goes for your lips too! , Take your finger and run it very lightly around the edge of your lips.
Do you feel that? There's some very sensitive skin around the edge of the mouth.
Kiss her just at the corner of the mouth and deny her a proper kiss for a few minutes (no matter how much she tries).
You'll drive her crazy. , The neck and inner thighs tend to be the obvious spots.
So obvious, in fact, that we forget how sensitive other parts of the body are.
If you want to get her writhing, trail some kisses along the side of her ribs (that spot that's so easy to tickle), the curve of her stomach just past where her abs are, and the protruding bit of her hip bone (usually found just above or just below the waistband). , Don't undress her too fast and when you do undress her, make it a part of the experience, rather than just a hurdle.
Girls spend a lot of time making themselves look nice.
When you just rip everything off without appreciating it, it's like you got handed a pristinely wrapped present and didn't even care. , You don't have to go wild, but a blindfold or tying her hands back with a silk scarf can force her to focus on what she's feeling.
Just make sure she consents! , If you really want to get serious, one of the better ways to really physically turn her on is to make use of her anatomy.
Get a good primer on female anatomy and start experimenting.
The clitoris is your friend.
Find it.
Master it.
But don't neglect all of the other sensitive areas around it! Good luck -
Step 3: Be the best version of yourself.
-
Step 4: Be confident
-
Step 5: even if you don't act like it.
-
Step 6: Clean up.
-
Step 7: Know how to treat a girl like a lady.
-
Step 8: Start with slow
-
Step 9: gentle touches.
-
Step 10: Whisper in her ear.
-
Step 11: Caress her.
-
Step 12: Touch the back of her neck.
-
Step 13: Touch her wrists.
-
Step 14: Play with her hair.
-
Step 15: Touch her leg.
-
Step 16: Give her an amazing kiss.
-
Step 17: Look for consent.
-
Step 18: Tell her what you want.
-
Step 19: Focus on more intimate erogenous zones.
-
Step 20: Use some variety.
-
Step 21: Leave her wanting more.
-
Step 22: Pay attention to lubrication.
-
Step 23: Kiss around her mouth.
-
Step 24: Master the stomach
-
Step 25: and pelvic kiss.
-
Step 26: Take your time when you undress her once you've made sure she's happy undressing.
-
Step 27: Introduce just a smidgen of kink.
-
Step 28: Learn some anatomy.
Detailed Guide
The key to turning a girl on is being patient.
As fast as guys usually get turned on, girls, and some women, need about that much build up.
This means that you'll have to lay a little ground work and take the seduction part nice and slow.
A huge part of warming her up, of course, is making her feel comfortable and safe.
You're going to see a lot of steps below about respecting her, seeking consent, and otherwise doing things that you might not think of as "turn-ons".
Don't neglect them, they're important.
Sex is very mental for many girls and women and if you help them by making it so that they don't have to worry, then that's half the battle.
You know that warm, fuzzy feeling you get when you find out that someone thinks you're good looking? That's what you want to create for her.
The fact that you think she's lovely to look at is a significant turn-on.
Here's how to communicate it without going overboard:
Say "Hey, pretty lady" or "Hello, beautiful" when you greet her.
It's simple and short, but direct (and potentially patronising
- use with caution).
Pay her a compliment.
Lower the volume and tone of your voice slightly, and say something like "You look amazing today" or "I love your eyes."
Be the person who's honestly kind, a person who respects her and thinks she's more beautiful than the most picturesque sunset.
Be the person who works hard and makes it easier for her to work hard, by helping to shoulder her burdens.
This will all mostly keep you from turning her off! , Some girls like a guy who is nervous and even klutzy around her, but don't overdo it.
If the girl is shy, be confident; if the girl is confident, feel free to act somewhat shy.
Keep your shoulders straight and your chin high, and don't be afraid to look her in the eyes.
You're communicating through your body language that you're strong, brave, and worthy of her attention. , Shower, put on deodorant, shave, brush your teeth and wear clean clothes.
If you're feeling up to it, you can also do your hair and put on a light spray of cologne.
Knowing that you're at your physical best will help you act confident and in-charge. , Save the dirty jokes and discussions of bodily functions for your guy friends.
When you're with the girl you like, be polite.
Use good table manners, hold the door open for her, and say please and thank you.
Good manners aren't necessarily attractive, but bad manners are definitely unattractive, so play it safe. , You can do these in passing, at the end of a date, while you're watching a movie, whenever — the point is that they don't have to be saved for when you're already making out.
They can, however, indicate that you're interested in doing a little more. , Ears are an erogenous zone for both sexes, and the light pressure of your breath will probably feel good.
Saying the right things will also turn her on.
Try something like: "I couldn't stop thinking about you today". , Lightly brush the back of your fingers over the side of her face.
Bonus points if you can lock eyes with her at the same time. , You can gently run your thumb over her hairline if your arm is already around her shoulders, or offer to give her a neck rub.
Keep your motions slow and light. , Always be confident to make the first move; hold her hand.
If you're holding hands, lightly stroke the inside of her wrist or her palm.
A few slow kisses on the inside of the wrist could work, too. , The scalp is a sensitive area for most people, and the light (repeat: light, not hard) tugging that comes from you playing with her hair will feel nice.
Run your fingers through it, twirl it, or stroke it. , If you're fairly sure it won't be unwelcome, try laying a hand on the top of her thigh.
This works best if you're both sitting down.
Let it rest there lightly.
If she seems receptive, you can try slowly moving your thumb back and forth over her leg, keeping the rest of your hand where it is. , If it's done right, a kiss can be the most effective way of turning a girl on.
Keep your breath fresh with some gum or mouthwash and keep your lips loose.
Tight, puckered lips is how you kiss your grandma! You should also keep the tongue action delicate (at first).
The motions should be light, soft and alternate between fast and slow.
Know where to put your hands.
The back of her neck, the sides of her face, or around her waist are all good areas for your hands to rest during a kiss. , If you touch a girl in certain areas without her consent, it is sexual assault.
A simple "Is this OK?" is enough.
If she says yes, you're all clear; if she says no, stop immediately. , Many girls are way more sexual than you, potentially.
Give them credit for that and there's nothing wrong with telling them how much you want them (once you've gotten your foot in the door a bit).
This actually turns them on! Think about it: you feel turned on when you feel desirable too.
Don't be really gross about it but don't be afraid to tell them how sexy you think they are and how you can't wait to get them in bed. , If you tried some of the suggestions above and she seemed receptive, here are some more intimate areas you can work with, using light touches and soft, slow kisses.
Neck, throat, collarbones and shoulders Feet and ankles The small of her back (toward the bottom of the spine) Back of the knees Inner thighs Ears The inside of her upper arm , If you find an area where she likes to be touched, don't overuse it.
Instead, back away from it for a while and slowly make your way back, touching everything around and up to it.
The anticipation will make it more intense when you finally do touch her. , Leaving before the other person gets bored is a good rule for most social interactions, but it's particularly important here.
If you break off contact while she's still interested, you'll be on her mind constantly. , Because many girls take longer to warm up, repeated...friction can cause skin to become sensitive or even painful.
Consider getting a quality, water-soluble lubricant to keep everything slick and sexy-feeling if you plan on some prolonged fun times, but, for most girls additional lubrication shouldn't be required if they are turned on.
Don't forget that a lack of natural lubrication can be a sign that your girl isn't turned on-at all! This goes for your lips too! , Take your finger and run it very lightly around the edge of your lips.
Do you feel that? There's some very sensitive skin around the edge of the mouth.
Kiss her just at the corner of the mouth and deny her a proper kiss for a few minutes (no matter how much she tries).
You'll drive her crazy. , The neck and inner thighs tend to be the obvious spots.
So obvious, in fact, that we forget how sensitive other parts of the body are.
If you want to get her writhing, trail some kisses along the side of her ribs (that spot that's so easy to tickle), the curve of her stomach just past where her abs are, and the protruding bit of her hip bone (usually found just above or just below the waistband). , Don't undress her too fast and when you do undress her, make it a part of the experience, rather than just a hurdle.
Girls spend a lot of time making themselves look nice.
When you just rip everything off without appreciating it, it's like you got handed a pristinely wrapped present and didn't even care. , You don't have to go wild, but a blindfold or tying her hands back with a silk scarf can force her to focus on what she's feeling.
Just make sure she consents! , If you really want to get serious, one of the better ways to really physically turn her on is to make use of her anatomy.
Get a good primer on female anatomy and start experimenting.
The clitoris is your friend.
Find it.
Master it.
But don't neglect all of the other sensitive areas around it! Good luck
About the Author
Isabella Long
Brings years of experience writing about crafts and related subjects.
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