How to Win Bullshit

Be Honest, If it's 9's to you, and you play 4's, even though you have some 9's, you've just created a potential crisis for yourself, which you could have easily avoided by simply telling the truth., Arrange your cards, not from A to K, but in the...

43 Steps 4 min read Advanced

Step-by-Step Guide

  1. Step 1: Be Honest

    Of course, it's not always possible to tell the truth, but when it is possible, you should do it.
  2. Step 2: If it's 9's to you

    For example, if you're playing with three people, count from A to K in your mind, accenting every third number: "A 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 J Q K A 2
    3..." and so on. the bolded numbers are the ones that you're supposed to play, and the other two are the ones that your opponents play.

    It's easy to see that the cards will come to you in this order:
    A 4 7 10 K 3 6 9 Q 2 5 8 J, then back to A. , For example, four players gives you the sequence:
    A 5 9 K 4 8 Q 3 7 J 2 6 10, and five players gives you the sequence:
    A 6 J 3 8 K 5 10 2 7 Q 4
    9.

    You should either memorize these sequences, or be able to figure them out quickly in your mind, by counting as in step
    2. , For example, there are four players, it's 9's to you, and you have only A's, 6's, and K's. what do you play? Well, look at the four-player sequence.

    K's are coming up on your next turn, so hold on to your kings.

    That way you can play them without having to lie. (See step 1).

    Neither 6's nor A's are coming up very soon, but 6's are coming a bit sooner, so you would be wisest to get rid of your A's.

    Who knows, by the time you get to 6's, you may be almost out of cards. , How many? Well, it depends.

    You're claiming to be playing 9's, so try to remember where the 9's are.

    Especially if it's late in the game, chances are someone has all four of them.

    If so, it doesn't matter what you do, they'll call BS anyway, if they're still awake.

    So you're kind of screwed.

    If you're pretty sure that one person has two 9's and another has the other two, then you can play up to two non-9's.

    If someone has three 9's, you can play only one.

    This is only a guideline.

    Exactly how many you play will depend on several things, like whether your opponents call BS all the time, or very rarely, how big the pile in the middle is, how close you are to winning, etc. , Otherwise, you might be letting them win, when you could instead be forcing them to keep playing.

    NOTE:
    If your playing elimination style you may want to wait for another person to call it so it doesn't hurt you. , When everyone at the table simultaneously shouts "BS!" at you, be sure to have an arrogant smug look on your face as you turn the card over to show them that you've won. , Plan this before your turn comes up.

    If you mess with your cards too much, people will suspect.

    Put your cards down in a clean stack, so no one can tell how many cards you've put down.

    Also, be sure to put the extra cards down underneath your four-of-a-kind; that way, if someone calls BS, you may be able to get away with just turning over the four legit cards.

    If you're still caught, exclaim that you made a mistake and you actually meant to put only four cards down.

    This trick can work with three-of-a-kind, or even with a pair, but the fewer cards you're claiming the more noticeable the extras will be. , Won't work if the other person has the specific card and knows for sure you are lying. , This works with seriously gullible people and they actually take the pile.

    But if you're caught no one will trust you again throughout the game. , If they know you have less cards, they'll call cheat on you. , This way, if they are cheating, the pile is less for you, and if they are not, then you are still going to end up with the same amount of cards you would if you didn't call cheat/BS. ,, This will make the other people think you are cheating.

    WARNING: this only works if you have a serious expression throughout.

    Also, as with all tricks with this game, don't overdo it. , it's real easy to get called when you look at you're hand and let out a few words that even shock people playing bullshit. , People will assume you are bluffing and that you accidentally forgot that jack comes after 10 and someone will most likely call BS on you.

    People will not fall for this twice so save it for the right time.
  3. Step 3: and you play 4's

  4. Step 4: even though you have some 9's

  5. Step 5: you've just created a potential crisis for yourself

  6. Step 6: which you could have easily avoided by simply telling the truth.

  7. Step 7: Arrange your cards

  8. Step 8: not from A to K

  9. Step 9: but in the order that the various values are going to come to you.

  10. Step 10: With different numbers of players

  11. Step 11: of course

  12. Step 12: the sequence is different.

  13. Step 13: When you have to lie

  14. Step 14: choose the card that comes latest in the sequence.

  15. Step 15: so you're going to play A's.

  16. Step 16: If someone has just played their last card

  17. Step 17: you should call BS unless you're 100% sure they're telling the truth.

  18. Step 18: If you follow this strategy

  19. Step 19: hopefully you will BE the person laying down your last card.

  20. Step 20: If you have all four of a kind

  21. Step 21: try to slip in a fifth card that you won't need (see step 2).

  22. Step 22: If you know you're about to be dead

  23. Step 23: and the pile is large and messy

  24. Step 24: try to stick the card in between some other cards in the pile so that if someone BS's you and turns over the top card

  25. Step 25: you can proclaim that they messed up the order

  26. Step 26: and that your card's in there.

  27. Step 27: If you're playing with noobs

  28. Step 28: and one of them catches you

  29. Step 29: laugh and make a smug face while pushing the cards towards them.

  30. Step 30: Always keep your cards in a way so that other people can't tell how many cards you have.

  31. Step 31: If the pile is big

  32. Step 32: and you have very little chance of getting away with a cheat

  33. Step 33: call cheat before your turn comes up on someone you think might be cheating.

  34. Step 34: Maintain a constant expression throughout the game.

  35. Step 35: If you are playing with people new to the game

  36. Step 36: try this for the first few times: when the pile is big

  37. Step 37: and you have the right card

  38. Step 38: make a very tiny smile or some other suspicious expression when putting down your card.

  39. Step 39: Always know what card you need next and if you have it.

  40. Step 40: If it is your turn to play a jack and you have a jack

  41. Step 41: you can play it and say

  42. Step 42: "One eleven

  43. Step 43: I mean jack."

Detailed Guide

Of course, it's not always possible to tell the truth, but when it is possible, you should do it.

For example, if you're playing with three people, count from A to K in your mind, accenting every third number: "A 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 J Q K A 2
3..." and so on. the bolded numbers are the ones that you're supposed to play, and the other two are the ones that your opponents play.

It's easy to see that the cards will come to you in this order:
A 4 7 10 K 3 6 9 Q 2 5 8 J, then back to A. , For example, four players gives you the sequence:
A 5 9 K 4 8 Q 3 7 J 2 6 10, and five players gives you the sequence:
A 6 J 3 8 K 5 10 2 7 Q 4
9.

You should either memorize these sequences, or be able to figure them out quickly in your mind, by counting as in step
2. , For example, there are four players, it's 9's to you, and you have only A's, 6's, and K's. what do you play? Well, look at the four-player sequence.

K's are coming up on your next turn, so hold on to your kings.

That way you can play them without having to lie. (See step 1).

Neither 6's nor A's are coming up very soon, but 6's are coming a bit sooner, so you would be wisest to get rid of your A's.

Who knows, by the time you get to 6's, you may be almost out of cards. , How many? Well, it depends.

You're claiming to be playing 9's, so try to remember where the 9's are.

Especially if it's late in the game, chances are someone has all four of them.

If so, it doesn't matter what you do, they'll call BS anyway, if they're still awake.

So you're kind of screwed.

If you're pretty sure that one person has two 9's and another has the other two, then you can play up to two non-9's.

If someone has three 9's, you can play only one.

This is only a guideline.

Exactly how many you play will depend on several things, like whether your opponents call BS all the time, or very rarely, how big the pile in the middle is, how close you are to winning, etc. , Otherwise, you might be letting them win, when you could instead be forcing them to keep playing.

NOTE:
If your playing elimination style you may want to wait for another person to call it so it doesn't hurt you. , When everyone at the table simultaneously shouts "BS!" at you, be sure to have an arrogant smug look on your face as you turn the card over to show them that you've won. , Plan this before your turn comes up.

If you mess with your cards too much, people will suspect.

Put your cards down in a clean stack, so no one can tell how many cards you've put down.

Also, be sure to put the extra cards down underneath your four-of-a-kind; that way, if someone calls BS, you may be able to get away with just turning over the four legit cards.

If you're still caught, exclaim that you made a mistake and you actually meant to put only four cards down.

This trick can work with three-of-a-kind, or even with a pair, but the fewer cards you're claiming the more noticeable the extras will be. , Won't work if the other person has the specific card and knows for sure you are lying. , This works with seriously gullible people and they actually take the pile.

But if you're caught no one will trust you again throughout the game. , If they know you have less cards, they'll call cheat on you. , This way, if they are cheating, the pile is less for you, and if they are not, then you are still going to end up with the same amount of cards you would if you didn't call cheat/BS. ,, This will make the other people think you are cheating.

WARNING: this only works if you have a serious expression throughout.

Also, as with all tricks with this game, don't overdo it. , it's real easy to get called when you look at you're hand and let out a few words that even shock people playing bullshit. , People will assume you are bluffing and that you accidentally forgot that jack comes after 10 and someone will most likely call BS on you.

People will not fall for this twice so save it for the right time.

About the Author

J

Joseph Thomas

Brings years of experience writing about crafts and related subjects.

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