How to Be a Good Girlfriend
Don't be too open in the very early days., Be honest., Speak your mind., Be yourself.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Don't be too open in the very early days.
Easing into a relationship is about ensuring that there is plenty of space for the two of you to get to know one another and trust that you're right for one another.
If you try too soon to "make" something more out of your relationship than it already is, premature pushiness can scare them away and spoil what is 'there' to be a good thing.
Instead, be patient and realize that it takes time to nurture a solid and enduring relationship.
If you want to be a good girlfriend, avoid the following things:
Don't push them to classify your relationship too soon.
You don't have to have the label girlfriend or boyfriend after a couple of dates; this risks causing them to feel that the decision wasn't their own.
Be patient and let them make up their own mind as to when the definitions, like going steady, exclusive relationship, serious dating etc start being bandied about.
If the two of you are compatible, your relationship will develop soon enough.
Don't start talking about marriage or starting a family before you've even met their close friends and parents.
Raising such issues prematurely can create tension from the outset and may stall or even bring to an end an otherwise productive and caring relationship.
Don't feel the need to show off or impress them.
You don't need to prove anything to them; you simply need to be present and engaged in listening, being attentive and sharing your interests. -
Step 2: Be honest.
While being honest to your partner is very important, to the point of being paramount, it is equally important that you are honest with yourself.
If you overreact or make a mistake, you can acknowledge your error and apologize.
If you're feeling vulnerable or upset, you can sort through your feelings and verbalize them to them in a non-accusing way.
And the most important thing here is that you will be open about your feelings as much as possible.
For example, if they do or say something that bothers you, be open about how it impacts you, without being accusing or asking them to change.
If you establish solid lines of communication from the outset, you'll know sooner rather than later whether this relationship will endure or fizzle out. , Don't be afraid to make your desires, needs, and opinions known, even when they may conflict with your partners'.
You don't and shouldn't exist solely to please them.
Besides, showing that you are your own person with your own needs, desires, and approach to life will keep them interested in getting to know and understand you as a person.
If you're comfortable with speaking your mind, then they'll be comfortable with speaking their mind, too.
Just remember to express yourself in way that doesn't attack anyone else's opinion or lifestyle in any way––you can be humble and outspoken at the same time by using assertiveness strategies and remaining considerate of their feelings too. , Don't create a fake you just to impress them.
It might be tempting if you think they'd prefer a different type of girl but usually this is just cobbling together snippets of things said or suggested and you're likely to be wrong.
After all, they want to date you, not some imagined form of perfection.
And if you really feel tempted to change things about yourself because they insist that you'd be better thinner, taller, prettier, quieter, whatever, then it's a good indication that you're not compatible.
If they actually say such things to you in a badgering, persistent manner, then it is not love, but an attempt to control you.
Don't pretend that you share their interests if you don't.
It might be amusing or "safe" to do so initially but it's extremely hurtful when they learn that you don't really love what they love; they could be basing their thoughts about your role in their future on something that isn't real and it'll end up hurting both of you. -
Step 3: Speak your mind.
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Step 4: Be yourself.
Detailed Guide
Easing into a relationship is about ensuring that there is plenty of space for the two of you to get to know one another and trust that you're right for one another.
If you try too soon to "make" something more out of your relationship than it already is, premature pushiness can scare them away and spoil what is 'there' to be a good thing.
Instead, be patient and realize that it takes time to nurture a solid and enduring relationship.
If you want to be a good girlfriend, avoid the following things:
Don't push them to classify your relationship too soon.
You don't have to have the label girlfriend or boyfriend after a couple of dates; this risks causing them to feel that the decision wasn't their own.
Be patient and let them make up their own mind as to when the definitions, like going steady, exclusive relationship, serious dating etc start being bandied about.
If the two of you are compatible, your relationship will develop soon enough.
Don't start talking about marriage or starting a family before you've even met their close friends and parents.
Raising such issues prematurely can create tension from the outset and may stall or even bring to an end an otherwise productive and caring relationship.
Don't feel the need to show off or impress them.
You don't need to prove anything to them; you simply need to be present and engaged in listening, being attentive and sharing your interests.
While being honest to your partner is very important, to the point of being paramount, it is equally important that you are honest with yourself.
If you overreact or make a mistake, you can acknowledge your error and apologize.
If you're feeling vulnerable or upset, you can sort through your feelings and verbalize them to them in a non-accusing way.
And the most important thing here is that you will be open about your feelings as much as possible.
For example, if they do or say something that bothers you, be open about how it impacts you, without being accusing or asking them to change.
If you establish solid lines of communication from the outset, you'll know sooner rather than later whether this relationship will endure or fizzle out. , Don't be afraid to make your desires, needs, and opinions known, even when they may conflict with your partners'.
You don't and shouldn't exist solely to please them.
Besides, showing that you are your own person with your own needs, desires, and approach to life will keep them interested in getting to know and understand you as a person.
If you're comfortable with speaking your mind, then they'll be comfortable with speaking their mind, too.
Just remember to express yourself in way that doesn't attack anyone else's opinion or lifestyle in any way––you can be humble and outspoken at the same time by using assertiveness strategies and remaining considerate of their feelings too. , Don't create a fake you just to impress them.
It might be tempting if you think they'd prefer a different type of girl but usually this is just cobbling together snippets of things said or suggested and you're likely to be wrong.
After all, they want to date you, not some imagined form of perfection.
And if you really feel tempted to change things about yourself because they insist that you'd be better thinner, taller, prettier, quieter, whatever, then it's a good indication that you're not compatible.
If they actually say such things to you in a badgering, persistent manner, then it is not love, but an attempt to control you.
Don't pretend that you share their interests if you don't.
It might be amusing or "safe" to do so initially but it's extremely hurtful when they learn that you don't really love what they love; they could be basing their thoughts about your role in their future on something that isn't real and it'll end up hurting both of you.
About the Author
Deborah Perez
A passionate writer with expertise in hobbies topics. Loves sharing practical knowledge.
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