How to Gain an Autistic Child's Trust
Consider if the child has been mistreated in the past., Look at the child's communication skills., Consider ways you may have misbehaved in the past., Consider whether you could be scary to the child., Look at the environment., Ask the child's...
Step-by-Step Guide
-
Step 1: Consider if the child has been mistreated in the past.
Some autistic children have faced severe bullying or abuse (including therapy abuse) that may make it difficult for them to trust other people.
A child who doesn't feel safe is unlikely to be trusting.
A child who was harmed physically or emotionally by adults, or whose requests for help were ignored by adults, may not trust adults.
A child can be just naturally shy.
Don't feel bad if this is the case. -
Step 2: Look at the child's communication skills.
If the child isn't able to reliably express their needs, then it's less likely that their needs will be met.
When adults don't meet a child's needs, the child struggles to trust them.
If a child can't speak or use AAC reliably, helping them learn to do so is crucial.If the child can only use a very limited type of AAC (such as PECS or buttons to press), a therapist should be helping them expand their repertoire so they can learn to express more complex thoughts and sentences. , If you have interacted with the child before, and they don't seem to like you, it could be because you did something that was rude or inconsiderate.
Did you try to force hugs, kisses, or eye contact? Did you respect their need for quiet time when they got overwhelmed? Did you trick them? Did you treat them with respect? Did you coerce or lie to them? , Adults can be large and scary, especially if they are unpredictable or noisy.
Do your best to stay calm and consistent when you interact with them.
Unexpected sensory input, such as touch from behind or a sudden shout, can be scary to an autistic person.
Many autistic people find it scary to look into someone else's eyes.
Don't try to make eye contact, and consider wearing sunglasses so that they don't need to worry about your eyes at all. , If a child is hypersensitive to sounds, light, et cetera, then a busy environment may be uncomfortable and distracting to them.
If the surroundings are upsetting, then they can't relax enough to interact well.
This isn't an issue of trust, but discomfort.
A quiet, low-key environment is good for a hypersensitive autistic child.
When they aren't startled or distracted, they may be able to open up better. , They may have insight regarding why the child is shy or withdrawn.
They can also tell you what scares or upsets the child, so you know to avoid doing these things.
If you are going to be doing activities with the child, you can also ask the family about the child's favorite things, to give you ideas.
For example, Rose likes playing with toy cars and climbing trees.
A caretaker can use this to their advantage, so Anne can play something related to climbing trees with Rose. -
Step 3: Consider ways you may have misbehaved in the past.
-
Step 4: Consider whether you could be scary to the child.
-
Step 5: Look at the environment.
-
Step 6: Ask the child's family members and loved ones
-
Step 7: if you can.
Detailed Guide
Some autistic children have faced severe bullying or abuse (including therapy abuse) that may make it difficult for them to trust other people.
A child who doesn't feel safe is unlikely to be trusting.
A child who was harmed physically or emotionally by adults, or whose requests for help were ignored by adults, may not trust adults.
A child can be just naturally shy.
Don't feel bad if this is the case.
If the child isn't able to reliably express their needs, then it's less likely that their needs will be met.
When adults don't meet a child's needs, the child struggles to trust them.
If a child can't speak or use AAC reliably, helping them learn to do so is crucial.If the child can only use a very limited type of AAC (such as PECS or buttons to press), a therapist should be helping them expand their repertoire so they can learn to express more complex thoughts and sentences. , If you have interacted with the child before, and they don't seem to like you, it could be because you did something that was rude or inconsiderate.
Did you try to force hugs, kisses, or eye contact? Did you respect their need for quiet time when they got overwhelmed? Did you trick them? Did you treat them with respect? Did you coerce or lie to them? , Adults can be large and scary, especially if they are unpredictable or noisy.
Do your best to stay calm and consistent when you interact with them.
Unexpected sensory input, such as touch from behind or a sudden shout, can be scary to an autistic person.
Many autistic people find it scary to look into someone else's eyes.
Don't try to make eye contact, and consider wearing sunglasses so that they don't need to worry about your eyes at all. , If a child is hypersensitive to sounds, light, et cetera, then a busy environment may be uncomfortable and distracting to them.
If the surroundings are upsetting, then they can't relax enough to interact well.
This isn't an issue of trust, but discomfort.
A quiet, low-key environment is good for a hypersensitive autistic child.
When they aren't startled or distracted, they may be able to open up better. , They may have insight regarding why the child is shy or withdrawn.
They can also tell you what scares or upsets the child, so you know to avoid doing these things.
If you are going to be doing activities with the child, you can also ask the family about the child's favorite things, to give you ideas.
For example, Rose likes playing with toy cars and climbing trees.
A caretaker can use this to their advantage, so Anne can play something related to climbing trees with Rose.
About the Author
Donald Kelly
Experienced content creator specializing in pet care guides and tutorials.
Rate This Guide
How helpful was this guide? Click to rate: