How to Improve Your Relationships when You Have ADHD
Help your partner learn about your condition., Ask for forgiveness and patience., Stay connected., Help your partner help you.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Help your partner learn about your condition.
Your partner may get the wrong impression that the way you behave sometimes is just “you.” If they study up on ADHD, they will likely find that some of the things you do are out of your control.
Because of this, they may have more patience and understanding.
Encourage your partner to come to your doctor with you.
This way they can ask the physician questions about ADHD and learn how you can work together to manage the symptoms. -
Step 2: Ask for forgiveness and patience.
People with ADHD don’t typically do things on purpose just to upset their partners.
Oftentimes, it is just their condition taking over.
Ask your partner to understand this and to give you grace and patience.
Also ask them to forgive you for your shortcomings.
For example, you could say, “I know my behavior upsets you sometimes, but I don’t do it on purpose.
I am really trying the best I can and I need you to be accepting of that and be patient with me.” Through this, your partner can see that you are trying and may be more willing to make an effort, as well., Relationships that are affected by ADHD can be hard to maintain; however, you should make it a priority to spend alone time together with your partner.
Set up weekly or monthly dates so that you can reconnect and remind yourselves of why you fell in love in the first place., Tell your partner what they can do to help you make this relationship work.
Doing this as a team helps them feel involved, and gets you both on the same page.
Committing to working through this together builds your trust and can ultimately improve your relationship.
For example, if you feel like your partner assumes the role of the parent in the relationship, let them know they don’t have to do that.
Show them that you are a capable adult by doing the best you can.
If you have trouble remembering conversations with your partner, ask them to have you repeat back or summarize what you just talked about.For instance, before you end the conversation, you might say, "Okay, I need to pick up the dry cleaning and you'll be home late tonight, so I should do dinner on my own." -
Step 3: Stay connected.
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Step 4: Help your partner help you.
Detailed Guide
Your partner may get the wrong impression that the way you behave sometimes is just “you.” If they study up on ADHD, they will likely find that some of the things you do are out of your control.
Because of this, they may have more patience and understanding.
Encourage your partner to come to your doctor with you.
This way they can ask the physician questions about ADHD and learn how you can work together to manage the symptoms.
People with ADHD don’t typically do things on purpose just to upset their partners.
Oftentimes, it is just their condition taking over.
Ask your partner to understand this and to give you grace and patience.
Also ask them to forgive you for your shortcomings.
For example, you could say, “I know my behavior upsets you sometimes, but I don’t do it on purpose.
I am really trying the best I can and I need you to be accepting of that and be patient with me.” Through this, your partner can see that you are trying and may be more willing to make an effort, as well., Relationships that are affected by ADHD can be hard to maintain; however, you should make it a priority to spend alone time together with your partner.
Set up weekly or monthly dates so that you can reconnect and remind yourselves of why you fell in love in the first place., Tell your partner what they can do to help you make this relationship work.
Doing this as a team helps them feel involved, and gets you both on the same page.
Committing to working through this together builds your trust and can ultimately improve your relationship.
For example, if you feel like your partner assumes the role of the parent in the relationship, let them know they don’t have to do that.
Show them that you are a capable adult by doing the best you can.
If you have trouble remembering conversations with your partner, ask them to have you repeat back or summarize what you just talked about.For instance, before you end the conversation, you might say, "Okay, I need to pick up the dry cleaning and you'll be home late tonight, so I should do dinner on my own."
About the Author
Emily Howard
Creates helpful guides on creative arts to inspire and educate readers.
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