How to Know when You Love Him or Her

Ask your friends for feedback., Be sure your family likes them., Be a better person because of them., Apologize and mean it., Be yourself around them.

5 Steps 3 min read Medium

Step-by-Step Guide

  1. Step 1: Ask your friends for feedback.

    When you love someone, immediately you want to introduce them to your friends.

    When you do introduce them, ask your friends for their honest opinions about your love interest.

    Your friends might be able to be more objective than you and help you identify whether you seem in love or merely infatuated.

    It’s important before embarking on a new relationship to have at least some approval from your friends.

    Your friends know you and care about you, and it’s a red flag if everyone but you is skeptical of your new love.
  2. Step 2: Be sure your family likes them.

    As with your friends, your family can help you discern whether your crush is a good fit for you and whether what you’re experiencing is love.

    Love builds you up and is long-lasting.

    Lust or a passing crush fades, and your family can help you tell the difference.

    Ask your parents, grandparents, or aunts and uncles how they knew that they found the right person.

    Their unique stories might help you get a better understanding of whether your own situation is love or something else. , When being around this person makes you want to be the best person you can be, it is a sign of love.

    For example, if this person makes you want to better yourself by working out or taking up a mutual hobby that interests both of you, it’s a sign that you love them.

    Wanting to improve yourself for someone often means that you love them.

    Note that this is not the same as loving someone who is trying to change you into someone you’re not.

    It’s healthy to want to better yourself to be the best possible partner for someone you love.

    It’s a red flag if someone you love is trying to force you to change instead of loving you for you. , When you accidentally hurt someone you love, you will apologize and mean it.

    If you don’t really love the person, your apology might feel half-hearted.

    Truly wanting forgiveness and meaning it when you apologize is a sign that this person means a lot to you and you’re in love., Once you’re past the initial “crush” phase, if you find that you can be yourself around this person, that’s a good sign that you’re in love.

    When you can let down your guard and that person still accepts you as you are, you can be confident that you’re in love.If you feel comfortable enough to leave your makeup at home or wear pajamas for a movie night, for example, that’s a sign that you’re comfortable being yourself in the relationship and secure with your love.
  3. Step 3: Be a better person because of them.

  4. Step 4: Apologize and mean it.

  5. Step 5: Be yourself around them.

Detailed Guide

When you love someone, immediately you want to introduce them to your friends.

When you do introduce them, ask your friends for their honest opinions about your love interest.

Your friends might be able to be more objective than you and help you identify whether you seem in love or merely infatuated.

It’s important before embarking on a new relationship to have at least some approval from your friends.

Your friends know you and care about you, and it’s a red flag if everyone but you is skeptical of your new love.

As with your friends, your family can help you discern whether your crush is a good fit for you and whether what you’re experiencing is love.

Love builds you up and is long-lasting.

Lust or a passing crush fades, and your family can help you tell the difference.

Ask your parents, grandparents, or aunts and uncles how they knew that they found the right person.

Their unique stories might help you get a better understanding of whether your own situation is love or something else. , When being around this person makes you want to be the best person you can be, it is a sign of love.

For example, if this person makes you want to better yourself by working out or taking up a mutual hobby that interests both of you, it’s a sign that you love them.

Wanting to improve yourself for someone often means that you love them.

Note that this is not the same as loving someone who is trying to change you into someone you’re not.

It’s healthy to want to better yourself to be the best possible partner for someone you love.

It’s a red flag if someone you love is trying to force you to change instead of loving you for you. , When you accidentally hurt someone you love, you will apologize and mean it.

If you don’t really love the person, your apology might feel half-hearted.

Truly wanting forgiveness and meaning it when you apologize is a sign that this person means a lot to you and you’re in love., Once you’re past the initial “crush” phase, if you find that you can be yourself around this person, that’s a good sign that you’re in love.

When you can let down your guard and that person still accepts you as you are, you can be confident that you’re in love.If you feel comfortable enough to leave your makeup at home or wear pajamas for a movie night, for example, that’s a sign that you’re comfortable being yourself in the relationship and secure with your love.

About the Author

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Helen Reed

Writer and educator with a focus on practical organization knowledge.

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