How to Love Someone The Way He Is

Make a pros and cons list., Look for reasons to compliment him., Focus on positive feelings., Make happy memories.

4 Steps 2 min read Medium

Step-by-Step Guide

  1. Step 1: Make a pros and cons list.

    Taking time to think about all of a person’s positive qualities can help you to remember what you love about them.

    At the same time, noting what frustrates you about a person can help to put things into perspective.

    Make a list of all of the things you love about this person and all of the things that annoy you about him.

    Review the list and pay special attention to the pros, such as his kind nature, his sense of humor, or the interests you share with him.

    Remind yourself that the things that annoy you may be things that can change in time, such as being a smoker, having a hard time remembering important dates, or seeming unmotivated.
  2. Step 2: Look for reasons to compliment him.

    People are extremely complicated beings that can be seen from many different angles.

    Whatever you choose to look for in a person, you are likely to find.

    Avoid looking for negative traits, and instead look for good traits within him.

    Reinforce those traits in his behavior (and in your own mind) by complimenting him often.For example, you could compliment his intelligence. , Again, where you put your own focus is crucial to determining how you feel about someone.

    In any person, there are things that will make you feel good and things that will make you feel bad.

    If you want to love him, pay attention to the things that make you feel good when you are with him.For example, you should focus on how he notices your feelings instead of how he doesn’t keep his bedroom clean. , Any kind of loving relationship needs reinforcement.

    You can strengthen your love for him by creating happy memories.

    Do things that both of you enjoy doing and spend time reflecting on it.

    If you have a lot of separate interests, take turns doing something the other would like.For example, if you both enjoy movies, you could take turns choosing a movie at the theater or for a home movie night.
  3. Step 3: Focus on positive feelings.

  4. Step 4: Make happy memories.

Detailed Guide

Taking time to think about all of a person’s positive qualities can help you to remember what you love about them.

At the same time, noting what frustrates you about a person can help to put things into perspective.

Make a list of all of the things you love about this person and all of the things that annoy you about him.

Review the list and pay special attention to the pros, such as his kind nature, his sense of humor, or the interests you share with him.

Remind yourself that the things that annoy you may be things that can change in time, such as being a smoker, having a hard time remembering important dates, or seeming unmotivated.

People are extremely complicated beings that can be seen from many different angles.

Whatever you choose to look for in a person, you are likely to find.

Avoid looking for negative traits, and instead look for good traits within him.

Reinforce those traits in his behavior (and in your own mind) by complimenting him often.For example, you could compliment his intelligence. , Again, where you put your own focus is crucial to determining how you feel about someone.

In any person, there are things that will make you feel good and things that will make you feel bad.

If you want to love him, pay attention to the things that make you feel good when you are with him.For example, you should focus on how he notices your feelings instead of how he doesn’t keep his bedroom clean. , Any kind of loving relationship needs reinforcement.

You can strengthen your love for him by creating happy memories.

Do things that both of you enjoy doing and spend time reflecting on it.

If you have a lot of separate interests, take turns doing something the other would like.For example, if you both enjoy movies, you could take turns choosing a movie at the theater or for a home movie night.

About the Author

J

Judith Simmons

A passionate writer with expertise in lifestyle topics. Loves sharing practical knowledge.

63 articles
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