How to Talk to Your Wife or Girlfriend about Oral Sex
Talk broadly about your sexual desires and fantasies together., Slowly ramp up your sexual adventures if oral sex seems too far off., Check in about your sex lives regularly.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Talk broadly about your sexual desires and fantasies together.
This can be an awkward conversation to bring up, but it is also a light-hearted and fun conversation once you both agree not to judge each other.
What fantasies or styles do you like? What silly but sexy ideas rev your engines? Do you share any? Remember, this isn't a deep, serious conversation, but it brings up the sort of conversational intimacy that can lead to discussion of oral sex:
Make lists of your top five dream places to have sex, even if some of them are unlikely or humorous.
Browse through a sex book or website like Kama Sutra, noting fun or adventurous positions to try.
Share any fantasies or secret desires together, asking hers as well.
If you can find ways to make both of you happy, this conversation will get much easier. -
Step 2: Slowly ramp up your sexual adventures if oral sex seems too far off.
If you feel like oral sex is something you want, but it is maybe moving things too quickly, start with smaller adventures.
Make a bigger deal of foreplay, which is a safe way to take small risks and learn more about each other.
Try some dirty talk.
Kiss all over each other's bodies, getting comfortable with every inch of each other.
As these thresholds are crossed, oral sex will become less of a big topic and more of a natural next step. , If you're in a committed relationship you can't have one talk about sex and then never bring it up again.
Why would you?! Whether the conversation is about oral sex or not, checking in with each other about your sex life is important to grow and build a relationship together.
Moreover, it makes it far easier to broach the topic of oral sex when you have a history of open and honest sexual discussions.
Once you're comfortable together, are there new things you want to try (oral sex or otherwise)? Ask her the same question.
When sex comes up, don't shy away from it. "What do you think about our sex life these days," is a good, open-ended way to start talking. -
Step 3: Check in about your sex lives regularly.
Detailed Guide
This can be an awkward conversation to bring up, but it is also a light-hearted and fun conversation once you both agree not to judge each other.
What fantasies or styles do you like? What silly but sexy ideas rev your engines? Do you share any? Remember, this isn't a deep, serious conversation, but it brings up the sort of conversational intimacy that can lead to discussion of oral sex:
Make lists of your top five dream places to have sex, even if some of them are unlikely or humorous.
Browse through a sex book or website like Kama Sutra, noting fun or adventurous positions to try.
Share any fantasies or secret desires together, asking hers as well.
If you can find ways to make both of you happy, this conversation will get much easier.
If you feel like oral sex is something you want, but it is maybe moving things too quickly, start with smaller adventures.
Make a bigger deal of foreplay, which is a safe way to take small risks and learn more about each other.
Try some dirty talk.
Kiss all over each other's bodies, getting comfortable with every inch of each other.
As these thresholds are crossed, oral sex will become less of a big topic and more of a natural next step. , If you're in a committed relationship you can't have one talk about sex and then never bring it up again.
Why would you?! Whether the conversation is about oral sex or not, checking in with each other about your sex life is important to grow and build a relationship together.
Moreover, it makes it far easier to broach the topic of oral sex when you have a history of open and honest sexual discussions.
Once you're comfortable together, are there new things you want to try (oral sex or otherwise)? Ask her the same question.
When sex comes up, don't shy away from it. "What do you think about our sex life these days," is a good, open-ended way to start talking.
About the Author
Teresa Young
Brings years of experience writing about lifestyle and related subjects.
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