How to End Feelings of Shame when You Have OCD
Identify feelings of shame., Recognize the effects of shame., Challenge negative thoughts., Journal., Resolve underlying trauma.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Identify feelings of shame.
Shame can occur when you feel you are unworthy, unlovable, or lesser-than others.
Shame can make you feel like you don’t deserve love, prosperity, or happiness because there is something fundamentally “wrong” with you.Shame can make you feel alone and cause you to isolate yourself.
However, the less you talk about shame, the more power it can have over your life.Shame can be behind the thoughts, “You’ll never really belong.
You always fail at everything you do.
Who would ever love you?” -
Step 2: Recognize the effects of shame.
Shame is not productive and often leads people to destructive and dysfunctional behaviors.
Feeling shame ultimately means that you feel like you are wrong or bad and cannot be improved.While guilt can be a catalyst for growth or change, shame can send you down a deep hole of emotions that seems impossible to escape.
Recognizing the role of shame in your life can help you realize how it is affecting you.
It’s important to identify feelings of shame so that you can begin to challenge those feelings.
Realize that shame will not help you cope with OCD.
Everyone has problems and issues.
No one gets by in life without having them.
OCD is a treatable condition.
Feeling ashamed for a problem you're experiencing could block your progress in helping you cope with your OCD. , Shame about your OCD may affect your thoughts, which might reinforce feelings of shame.
Therefore, you may need to work on changing your thoughts to overcome shame.
For instance, you may think, “Nobody will ever love me because I have this deep secret that I can’t share with anyone.” Or you may think, “If anyone knew my OCD struggles, I wouldn’t have any friends and I’d be all alone.” Recognize that these harmful thoughts may be contributing to feelings of shame and may not be true.To challenge these thoughts, first identify the negative thoughts.
Say, “This is a negative thought.” Then, challenge the thought.
Say to yourself, “Is this true? Is this accurate? Is this thought rational? Am I overgeneralizing? How would I respond to a friend who said this about herself?“ Once you’ve challenged the thought, replace it with a more positive or rational thought.
For example, you may say, “Even though my OCD may shock someone when I tell them about it, a real friend is someone who supports me through difficult times.” , You may feel hesitant to share your feelings with others, but journaling can be helpful in expressing your feelings of shame and understanding them better.
This might help you to overcome your feelings of shame about your OCD.
Writing in a journal can help bring clarity to your thoughts and feelings.It can also help you reflect on your life more clearly when you read it back.
Use a journal to explore your feelings related to shame.
Some possible journal entries could include: “What makes me feel ashamed? When do I feel ashamed of my OCD? What keeps me from telling people about OCD? How have I dealt with shame in the past? What are some things I can do to feel better when I feel ashamed?” You can also use your journal to track symptoms each day.This way, you can track what triggers feelings of shame and how you handle them. , For some people, OCD symptoms may result as a way to cope with the trauma.Think about your OCD symptoms and whether they started around the time of a trauma or involve compulsions that are related to a trauma.
For example, if you were hit by a car while walking, you may check for cars compulsively, not cross streets that have cars in them, or count your steps as you cross the street.
While the OCD symptoms may be bothersome, the underlying cause is the trauma of being hit.
If you have an unresolved trauma, partner with a therapist to work through the trauma and relieve symptoms of OCD.
Cognitive approaches to treating OCD may be ineffective until the trauma is resolved. -
Step 3: Challenge negative thoughts.
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Step 4: Journal.
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Step 5: Resolve underlying trauma.
Detailed Guide
Shame can occur when you feel you are unworthy, unlovable, or lesser-than others.
Shame can make you feel like you don’t deserve love, prosperity, or happiness because there is something fundamentally “wrong” with you.Shame can make you feel alone and cause you to isolate yourself.
However, the less you talk about shame, the more power it can have over your life.Shame can be behind the thoughts, “You’ll never really belong.
You always fail at everything you do.
Who would ever love you?”
Shame is not productive and often leads people to destructive and dysfunctional behaviors.
Feeling shame ultimately means that you feel like you are wrong or bad and cannot be improved.While guilt can be a catalyst for growth or change, shame can send you down a deep hole of emotions that seems impossible to escape.
Recognizing the role of shame in your life can help you realize how it is affecting you.
It’s important to identify feelings of shame so that you can begin to challenge those feelings.
Realize that shame will not help you cope with OCD.
Everyone has problems and issues.
No one gets by in life without having them.
OCD is a treatable condition.
Feeling ashamed for a problem you're experiencing could block your progress in helping you cope with your OCD. , Shame about your OCD may affect your thoughts, which might reinforce feelings of shame.
Therefore, you may need to work on changing your thoughts to overcome shame.
For instance, you may think, “Nobody will ever love me because I have this deep secret that I can’t share with anyone.” Or you may think, “If anyone knew my OCD struggles, I wouldn’t have any friends and I’d be all alone.” Recognize that these harmful thoughts may be contributing to feelings of shame and may not be true.To challenge these thoughts, first identify the negative thoughts.
Say, “This is a negative thought.” Then, challenge the thought.
Say to yourself, “Is this true? Is this accurate? Is this thought rational? Am I overgeneralizing? How would I respond to a friend who said this about herself?“ Once you’ve challenged the thought, replace it with a more positive or rational thought.
For example, you may say, “Even though my OCD may shock someone when I tell them about it, a real friend is someone who supports me through difficult times.” , You may feel hesitant to share your feelings with others, but journaling can be helpful in expressing your feelings of shame and understanding them better.
This might help you to overcome your feelings of shame about your OCD.
Writing in a journal can help bring clarity to your thoughts and feelings.It can also help you reflect on your life more clearly when you read it back.
Use a journal to explore your feelings related to shame.
Some possible journal entries could include: “What makes me feel ashamed? When do I feel ashamed of my OCD? What keeps me from telling people about OCD? How have I dealt with shame in the past? What are some things I can do to feel better when I feel ashamed?” You can also use your journal to track symptoms each day.This way, you can track what triggers feelings of shame and how you handle them. , For some people, OCD symptoms may result as a way to cope with the trauma.Think about your OCD symptoms and whether they started around the time of a trauma or involve compulsions that are related to a trauma.
For example, if you were hit by a car while walking, you may check for cars compulsively, not cross streets that have cars in them, or count your steps as you cross the street.
While the OCD symptoms may be bothersome, the underlying cause is the trauma of being hit.
If you have an unresolved trauma, partner with a therapist to work through the trauma and relieve symptoms of OCD.
Cognitive approaches to treating OCD may be ineffective until the trauma is resolved.
About the Author
Arthur Harris
Arthur Harris has dedicated 10 years to mastering lifestyle and practical guides. As a content creator, Arthur focuses on providing actionable tips and step-by-step guides.
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