How to Explain Your Chronic Pain to Others
Explain your condition., Tell them about the pain scale., Describe the type of pain., Detail your treatment., Use the spoon theory.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Explain your condition.
To start telling someone about your chronic pain, you should explain to them the root of your pain.
You may not feel comfortable giving specific details, and you don’t need to.
You may want to tell the person what hurts you, like your back, head, or entire body.
You may also choose to tell them the cause, like lupus, fibromyalgia, or IBS.If you don’t feel like going into all the details, you may suggest that the person research the condition.
You may also choose to print out basic information for the person to read. -
Step 2: Tell them about the pain scale.
Most people with chronic pain evaluate the pain on a pain scale.
You should tell the person about this scale so they can understand the intensity of your pain when you give them a number.
The pain scale ranges from one to
10.Pain that is a one to three is minor pain.
You can go about your daily activities.
Pain between four and seven is moderate.
This pain interferes with your daily activities.
Pain between eight and 10 is severe.
This pain is debilitating and causes you to be unable to do daily activities. , You can also try describing what the pain is like in terms the other person might understand.
For instance, you could use words like stabbing, dull, sharp, tingling, throbbing, feeling warm/hot/numb, etc.
It might also be helpful to to compare it to minor pain that the other person may have felt (if applicable). "It kinda feels like the pinch from a shot, but never goes away," or, "It feels like a rubber band snap."
If you feel comfortable enough, you may want to explain your treatment to the person.
That may include medication you are taking, physical therapy you undergo, or any alternative treatments you receive.
This might help the person understand what you are doing to treat your pain.You may not feel comfortable discussing your medication, but you feel comfortable talking about relaxation techniques, acupuncture, and physical therapy you undergo.
Explaining that you are undergoing treatment might stop the other person from asking questions like, “Why aren’t you doing anything for the pain?” or trying to give you medical advice. , If you are trying to explain your chronic pain to someone, you may try using the spoon theory to get the idea across.
The spoon theory assigns a common daily task to each spoon a person carries.
Someone without chronic pain has unlimited spoons, because they can make unlimited choices without consequence.
A person with chronic pain has a limited amount of spoons, and when the spoons are gone, you have nothing left to give.For example, you may give someone 15 spoons to hold.
Have them go through their daily tasks.
Most tasks need to be broken into smaller tasks, such as bathing.
Bathing includes washing your hair, drying off, getting into the tub — which can very easily be three spoons.
This idea helps a person understand how each decision matters that you make during the day and how you have a limited amount of energy to give each day. -
Step 3: Describe the type of pain.
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Step 4: Detail your treatment.
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Step 5: Use the spoon theory.
Detailed Guide
To start telling someone about your chronic pain, you should explain to them the root of your pain.
You may not feel comfortable giving specific details, and you don’t need to.
You may want to tell the person what hurts you, like your back, head, or entire body.
You may also choose to tell them the cause, like lupus, fibromyalgia, or IBS.If you don’t feel like going into all the details, you may suggest that the person research the condition.
You may also choose to print out basic information for the person to read.
Most people with chronic pain evaluate the pain on a pain scale.
You should tell the person about this scale so they can understand the intensity of your pain when you give them a number.
The pain scale ranges from one to
10.Pain that is a one to three is minor pain.
You can go about your daily activities.
Pain between four and seven is moderate.
This pain interferes with your daily activities.
Pain between eight and 10 is severe.
This pain is debilitating and causes you to be unable to do daily activities. , You can also try describing what the pain is like in terms the other person might understand.
For instance, you could use words like stabbing, dull, sharp, tingling, throbbing, feeling warm/hot/numb, etc.
It might also be helpful to to compare it to minor pain that the other person may have felt (if applicable). "It kinda feels like the pinch from a shot, but never goes away," or, "It feels like a rubber band snap."
If you feel comfortable enough, you may want to explain your treatment to the person.
That may include medication you are taking, physical therapy you undergo, or any alternative treatments you receive.
This might help the person understand what you are doing to treat your pain.You may not feel comfortable discussing your medication, but you feel comfortable talking about relaxation techniques, acupuncture, and physical therapy you undergo.
Explaining that you are undergoing treatment might stop the other person from asking questions like, “Why aren’t you doing anything for the pain?” or trying to give you medical advice. , If you are trying to explain your chronic pain to someone, you may try using the spoon theory to get the idea across.
The spoon theory assigns a common daily task to each spoon a person carries.
Someone without chronic pain has unlimited spoons, because they can make unlimited choices without consequence.
A person with chronic pain has a limited amount of spoons, and when the spoons are gone, you have nothing left to give.For example, you may give someone 15 spoons to hold.
Have them go through their daily tasks.
Most tasks need to be broken into smaller tasks, such as bathing.
Bathing includes washing your hair, drying off, getting into the tub — which can very easily be three spoons.
This idea helps a person understand how each decision matters that you make during the day and how you have a limited amount of energy to give each day.
About the Author
Kathleen Kim
Experienced content creator specializing in practical skills guides and tutorials.
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