How to Feel Good About Accepting Help from Others

Say “thank you.” Feeling resentful about being helped brings up negative emotions., Reciprocate., Offer to pay for assistance., Challenge yourself to ask for help.

4 Steps 3 min read Medium

Step-by-Step Guide

  1. Step 1: Say “thank you.” Feeling resentful about being helped brings up negative emotions.

    However, when you give yourself permission to feel good about receiving help you, in turn, feel positive.

    The simplest way to get immediate positive feelings from being helped is by expressing your thanks.

    There are tons of ways to show those who help you appreciation.

    Offer to buy them lunch in the future.

    Write a heart-warming thank you note.

    Express your creativity by composing a song or poem, or simply forward one you like.
  2. Step 2: Reciprocate.

    Some people struggle with pride, which may be why they have trouble accepting help.

    Other people may feel guilty about accepting help, feel like the person may have an ulterior motive, or dislike the idea of being indebted to someone.

    You don’t feel lousy about receiving help when you know you will return the favor.

    When others help you, simply find a way to reciprocate.

    Let’s say your coworker picked up lunch for you on Wednesday.

    You might say, “Thanks so much for the salad, Cindy.

    I’ll take care of your meal after the workshop next week.” , If you’re trying to dip your foot in the gracious receiver pond, you can start by paying for help.

    In general, humans tend to place value on what they pay for.

    You buy a new dress or an expensive coffee and you swear it’s better than one you could have gotten at home.

    Follow that same logic to learn how to be more receptive to help.

    Think about what you need and find a way to pay for it.

    For instance, if you are struggling with depression, find a local counselor whose services you can afford.Need to move? Hire movers.

    Want to help your child with math? Hire a tutor.

    If money is an issue, see what the helper needs that you can provide.

    Swap services with someone.

    For instance, if the tutor you hired has a large lawn, you might offer to mow it for a few months to pay off the services.

    Some people may be offended by your offer to pay.

    If they express offense, ask if you can at least donate to a charity in their name. , Embrace your vulnerability by making a personal commitment to ask for help more often.

    Like a muscle that you strengthen over time, you can build the grace and humility that comes with receiving help by exercising them frequently.

    Choose a week or a month to start your commitment.

    Then, challenge yourself to ask someone for help each day of the challenge period.

    You can start small and progressively make more difficult requests as time goes on.

    For instance, you might start by asking someone to hold the door for you at the local grocery store.

    By the end of the challenge you might build up to asking a friend or family member to babysit your kids.
  3. Step 3: Offer to pay for assistance.

  4. Step 4: Challenge yourself to ask for help.

Detailed Guide

However, when you give yourself permission to feel good about receiving help you, in turn, feel positive.

The simplest way to get immediate positive feelings from being helped is by expressing your thanks.

There are tons of ways to show those who help you appreciation.

Offer to buy them lunch in the future.

Write a heart-warming thank you note.

Express your creativity by composing a song or poem, or simply forward one you like.

Some people struggle with pride, which may be why they have trouble accepting help.

Other people may feel guilty about accepting help, feel like the person may have an ulterior motive, or dislike the idea of being indebted to someone.

You don’t feel lousy about receiving help when you know you will return the favor.

When others help you, simply find a way to reciprocate.

Let’s say your coworker picked up lunch for you on Wednesday.

You might say, “Thanks so much for the salad, Cindy.

I’ll take care of your meal after the workshop next week.” , If you’re trying to dip your foot in the gracious receiver pond, you can start by paying for help.

In general, humans tend to place value on what they pay for.

You buy a new dress or an expensive coffee and you swear it’s better than one you could have gotten at home.

Follow that same logic to learn how to be more receptive to help.

Think about what you need and find a way to pay for it.

For instance, if you are struggling with depression, find a local counselor whose services you can afford.Need to move? Hire movers.

Want to help your child with math? Hire a tutor.

If money is an issue, see what the helper needs that you can provide.

Swap services with someone.

For instance, if the tutor you hired has a large lawn, you might offer to mow it for a few months to pay off the services.

Some people may be offended by your offer to pay.

If they express offense, ask if you can at least donate to a charity in their name. , Embrace your vulnerability by making a personal commitment to ask for help more often.

Like a muscle that you strengthen over time, you can build the grace and humility that comes with receiving help by exercising them frequently.

Choose a week or a month to start your commitment.

Then, challenge yourself to ask someone for help each day of the challenge period.

You can start small and progressively make more difficult requests as time goes on.

For instance, you might start by asking someone to hold the door for you at the local grocery store.

By the end of the challenge you might build up to asking a friend or family member to babysit your kids.

About the Author

J

Joyce Baker

Joyce Baker specializes in lifestyle and practical guides and has been creating helpful content for over 11 years. Joyce is committed to helping readers learn new skills and improve their lives.

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